3 month old night and day feeding mixed up?

[LittleWaveyLines]

Hi. My ebf DD feeds about 4 hourly during the day, and 2 hourly at night - this is most frustrating and I need more sleep!

I really need to sort this as she only naps 30-40mins at a time during the day so I can't catch up on sleep, and I'm so run down I have constant sore throats etc.

I also cannot get her to take a bottle, or feed lying down. We do cosleep so I've made it as easy as I can, but night feeds take about 30mins, by which time I've woken up, especially as I have to sit up to feed her. I keep it dark etc.... (day feeds take about 15mins)

So I know she can go 4 hours, but she won't at night (tried ignoring her but she's persistant) and I've tried upping feeds during the day - but she won't.

Help!

Hi LittleWavyLines, I cant help but you have my sympathy! My 15 week old DD has finally dropped off to sleep now but she'l be up in 2 hours from now on until 7am! She will go about 4 hours in the day - I have tride to make her take feeds more often in the day to top her up but she wont have any of it! Then night time comes round and she wants boob every two hours! I am thinking now that she surely cant be hungry and its more of a comfort/settling thing, but Im so exhuasted that its just easier to plug her on rather than try and comfort her back to sleep. She doesnt nap in the day either, I have to walk her around in the pram or rock back and forth - as soon as i stop walking or rocking her little eyes pop open! Really want her to be settled as shes getting very grizzley in the day because of lack of napping. ooh its so tricky! Cant do controlled crying, but I am really needing some ideas too!

If you don't already use a sling, that might be helpful in getting her to feed more often in the day, especially one you can use skin-to-skin. Four-hourly seems quite widely-spaced for a three month old so there should be room to move.

But it is completely normal to do this, they are very distractible in the day, and our prolactin levels are higher at night, which indicates that historically babies have fed more at night. So you're fighting thousands of years of evolution!

My daughter hasn't slept for more than three hours at a time in seven months (and usually it's one-two hours).

I always feed lying down, so I think working on that some more is your best bet for more sleep.

It's developmental, they'll get there in the end :)

sc2987 thanks - about the sling - do you mean just carrying her all day? I use a sling for walks, but she complains about it unless I have a fair pace on, so theres no stopping for chats or shopping! I suppose endless walking around the block would be good for the weight loss though

LittleWavey don't think it would be possible to carry her all day, you'd be exhausted! Will she go into the sling while you do things like make breakfast/washup/hoover?

What she is doing is completely normal and is called reverse cycling, there is some info and ways to deal with it here.

Some things that could help are getting her dressed in day clothes when she's had her first feed and then changing doing some sort of bedtime routine in the evening. Also make sure she has some time outside in the daylight. Once she's dressed you could maybe take her in the garden with you and have a cuppa outside while she wakes up properly.

She's also having very little sleep in the day and whilst this is normal for some babies, mine always slept better if they'd had better naps during the daytime. Will she go to sleep if you take her out in the car/sling/pushchair?

There is some info here on 31 ways to get your baby to sleep and stay asleep, thought it may help .

Do you go to a bfing group LittleWavey? At that age I found that going along and chatting to the other Mums and Mums-to-Be made me realise that what my LO was doing was normal and helped keep me sane.

Thanks for those links.
I thought reverse cycling was to do with sleeping so I've learnt something new! From the kellymom link I would have to say she comes under the distractable baby category... I do try to get her to nap better but she's just so alert she fights sleep - taking her out in th sling or pram keeps her awake as she is constantly looking around - I have to studiously ignore her in a quiet place to get her to nap, or feed her to sleep....

LittleWavey feeding her to sleep is absolutely fine. Ignore everyone who says its not, she won't want feeding to sleep when she's at school .

If think she is distractable, have you tried both getting in the bath and feeding her there? Four hours is a very long time for a bf baby to go in the day, I think your first priority should be try to get her to nurse more in the daytime.

Have you spoken to a BFC?

No I haven't spoken to a BFC, I did talk to the lady at the baby weighing, but she just said to try to feed her more often. I do try, but she just pulls away!

Well last night she skipped a feed - I cuddled her instead and she went back to sleep, so she might feed more often today? She really is doing very big feeds overnight - both breasts drained. Daytime tends to want just one side, and that not drained....

Its probably worth giving one of the helplines a call, they may be able to give you some tips on how to get her to feed more during the day. Hope it gets sorted for you soon.

I have found feeding her up stairs in our bedroom makes her take more in the day - I guess she thinks we're off to bed. We lye down on my bed together and have some nice quiet day time feeds. Shes less distracted this way and think she feels like shes in control of it, rather than me holding her and directing her head towards the boob. Maybe this will help you too?

Right, well have tried quiet daytime feeds, and she is now taking more. SoSo she is now feeding 1 1/2 - 2 hourly during the day as she used to....which is great!

....... trouble is her night time feeds are still 2 hourly and big feeds! Is there a 14-15 week growth spurt..?

YES theres always a growth spurt!!! Im now in the 4 month regression apparantly! waking all the time, every 2 hours till 4am then every hour! oh the joys