Help me stop bf my 13 month old....By Monday!

[virgo1979]

I need your help, I know it's my fault for leaving it so late but I didn't think it would be so hard.....

On Monday I am having a laparatomy - have endo and has resulted in bowel being stuck to ovary and all messed up so ovary to be taken out and bowel and everything else cleaned up, hopefully bowel will stay intact. Appendix also coming out. Have to take bowel prep medicine on sunday at midday, then go into hospital sunday night as will be nil by mouth and need to go on drip so not dehydrated. Will be away from DS for about 4 nights . DH is great with him though, so no worries there apart from.....

DS is still b-fed, never really had a bottle - maybe about ten times in his whole life, all before he was 6 months though. He is a good eater, but the last week has been teething and with the warm weather is not too interested in food, just sort of picking at his meals. Eating yogurts and fruits ok though. Last week started him on cows milk, he has had it in his weetabix for months now anyway so not a new taste to him. The first day was great as it was a novelty for him, but he is not drinking enough milk at all, say 1oz each time i give him some milk. He also still has a milk feed about half 4 in the morning so am worried about that too. Have tried bottle, beaker, doidy cup, his cup with straw......but no difference in how much he drinks.

So, can you tell me what to do about the following;

• shall I try formula instead of cows milk? Will he be more likely to drink it than cows milk? Could get a stash of ready made cartons?

- If he has 4am feed, 11am feed and 8pm feed, and I just stop on Sunday, will I get engorged boobs? - If I don't feed him for say, 5 days will I be able to feed him after or will my milk have dried up? Am thinking it might be easier after op to lie down with him and feed ?

Hope this makes sense. Thought I was ready to give up bf but now am trying to its so hard and I am going to miss it so much... Anybody been in a similar situation?

TIA

I wouldn't worry about intake too much. At this age it should be about a pint so if he has milk on weetabix and a yogurt every day you're more than half way there anyway. A few 1oz drinks of milk and either another yogurt or some cheese would cover it if you can't get him to take a full drink from a cup. If you're going to resume bf anyway then I really wouldn't worry about what he manages over that 5 days.

I'm not really sure about whether you will still have much milk after 5 days, I think it's different for different women tbh - a friend was still very engorged after 2 weeks but I wasn't engorged at all and it seemed to go away very quickly (possibly something to do with being pregnant..).

Thanks apple. Anyone else?

I'm probably being really stupid but I can't see what age your LO is. If he is over a year then just use a hand pump to keep your supply up and get DH to take the milk home with him. You say you are going to be away for four nights, will you not see LO at all? Can he be brought in for a feed once or twice a day towards the end?

My milk took about two weeks to dry up when I stopped, though the supply was seriously diminished within a few days.

As it's such a short time, I would not be too concerned if he missed milk for a day or two. If he is eating yoghurts and other dairy he will be getting some calcium.

as world says, use a hand pump as often as you usually bf, but bear in mind if you're on certain drugs i.e. painkillers etc you will have to discard the expressed milk. That should keep up your supply until you're able to bf directly again. Don't give up until you're really ready, I made that mistake and did regret it.

as apple says, I wouldn't worry to much about your DS's food intake for the week. If he gets thirsty, he will drink. You could try cartons of formula, as you've suggested, but as he's 13 months he could equally have cows milk. He'll have a lovely time with your DH. Try not to worry too much. Good luck!

Apparently formula tastes horrible, so he's less likely to drink that than cows milk.

If you were going to wean permananently, I wouldn't suggest this, but chocolate milk might get some dairy into him if you thought he wouldn't be eating enough in yoghurts/cheese/milk on cereal.
DS wouldn't touch normal cow milk, but would drink chocolate milk.
That's what breastmilk tastes like according to him.

The main thing is you not getting engorged and developing mastitis, so you need to pump or hand express which will help keep up your supply too.

After over a year of breastfeeding your supply should be fine I would have thought, even after a 5 day gap, though it will be much more comfortable for you to hand express, even if you need to get rid of the ebm.
I agree that cows milk would be nicer for DS than breast milk.
In your shoes I wouldnt worry about weaning, all a bit stressful to try and achieve this in only a couple of days, just give him cows milk until you are ok to feed him again.

thanks all. DS is 13 months world. Don't wnat to feed DS in hospital due to anaesthetic, mega strong painkillers etc, and last time i had a laparscopy and BF ds after few hours, my blood pressure dropped right down and had to be put back on drip :(

Will perservere with the cows milk, and am sure he will be ok, will just need to decide whether this is good time to wean or not?

Might be worth giving these guys a ring to discuss meds if you decide to express?

I stopped BF my son at 13 months as I had to leave him for 2 nights for a family funeral. I was OK with stopping so if you are too I'll give you my advice (for what it's worth). Some good advice above if you don't want to stop permanently.

DS was being fed morning and night up to the point I stopped. We had skipped the very odd feed up to that point without any engorgement so I wasn't too worried about that.

He never took a bottle but would take a sippy cup of either cows milk or ready made formula from about 10 months (wouldn't touch the powdered stuff - don't blame him!). If I was starting with non-BF milk where you are I think I would say stick with cows milk in a cup - saves you having to then wean him off bottle/formula (which is quite sweet I think).

I definitely agree with AppleandBlackberry that you can probably cover his calcium requirements quite adequately without stressing too much about volume of milk at specific times.

To avoid engorgment perhaps you coud skip the 11am feed for the next couple of days. I supsect it will be the easier one to get past by distraction etc. Presumably the 4am feed is a comfort feed anyway so your DH will probably just have to ride that one out with cuddles etc as milk from a beaker etc is unlikley to do the same job anyway.

Wishing you lots of luck with the op and a speedy recovery.

I stopped bf ds1 when he was 14 months or so, because I thought I should, even though I didn't want to. he was fine, I have always regretted it. if you don't want to stop, don't. if you can hand express a little in hospital it sounds like this would keep your supply going, and your ds can always up it if he wants when you get home.

hoping everything goes well and you recover well.

Virgo, mothers have c/s under general anaesthetic, have strong painkillers and IV drugs and then bf a newborn.

Check with your doctors cos it's unlikely anything they give you will affect a 13 month old.

Godd luck with the op

Thanks all for above comments, some really useful advice there. Will try and drop 11am feed for next couple of days matthewwright and offer cows milk from cup as well. Feel better about his calcium intake not too, he happily has yogurts and cheese, so no worries there. Am more nervous about leaving him than the op and being cut open!