wish me luck...i have decided to stop breastfeeding DD2 aged 22 months

[Greythorne]

I have been breastfeeding the DC now for 4 years (DD1 for 2 years, now DD2 for 22 months) and the time has come to stop!

I realised this at the weekend when I went to a wedding and was matron of honour and there was a whole raft of organisational hoo haa to allow me to be at the wedding + breastfeed DD2. Long story, but entailed DH leaving the wedding, taking DD home, coming back to wedding etc.

So. how do I do it?

Distraction techniques welcome for those times when she will be clawing at my top and no amount of milk from the fridge will work.

Any tips on what to do when, say, she has hurt herself in the way toddlers are wont and at the moment, the best plan if to whip out the boob for a quick top up?

Bedtimes?

Can I go old-school and put something foul tasting on my nipples? (Only half joking)

Oooh. I've been wondering the same thing myself as I've considered stopping with DS2 now he is 19 months ish. I've been breastfeeding for 4 years and I think I've had enough. I've no idea how...

I don't have the answer- I have the same problem. I'm still feeding dd aged 2.3 and have no idea how or when to stop! But it's becoming logistically difficult.

Just marking my place.

Hmmmm
It's just such a habit.
We went out for a quick supper tonight after school because DH was home (not at work this week, so we thought let's do something we never normally do). We went to a big family friendly chain and whilst we were waiting for the menus and first course, DD2 was getting restless and she was hungry and she was bored and I could see we were heading for disaster a challenging meal if the food did not arrive pronto. My first reaction was: give her a quick top up!

If I am honest, it's my response to 90% of difficult situations!

Anyway, tonight, I resisted and tried diversionary tactics.

Which was fine. As a one off! Cannot face the thought of months weeks of trying to divert attention and do entertainment in all manner of situations.

Plus, have NO idea how to cut the bedtime feeds......

DD is 26 months and i have tried a couple of times half heartedly to stop in the last few months. However, she onyl feed once each day, just before bed. but it is very ingrained in her routine.
initial plan was to get dh to put her to bed for a week, but he always seemed too busy to start this !, so on the advice of the health visitor at her belated 2 year check i have just been telling it has finished (actually hv said empty but i though finished was a better word as i use this with food - no more biscuits - finished etc).also offering her fod at this point - she won't take a milky drink of any kind so have been giving very watered down apple juice . lying her down a bit and rocking in the dark, everything really without the bf.
so far, 3 days no bf.
ist day - asked and looked a bit put out, asked a couple of times
2nd day - asked then looked confused at answer
3rd day - tried to lift top up i said milk finished, she repeated finished? and then gave up
4th day - didn't ask
we're only four days in but its' going ok.
having said this, i think my little boy would have been much more stroppy but i stopped him at 1y2m.
i had been trying to shorten length of feeds and saying finished after a few minutes for the last few weeks.
i have found it difficult to get used to as well tbh although i did want to stop.

offering her drink at this point - sorry

My elder son just suddenly lost interest at around 2.9 years. I didn't have a method or a strategy. I think he decided that it was just for babies (I had a 3 month old at the time) so I didn't need to worry about it.

Part of me feels that I should wait for DS2 to self-wean but I'm not sure I can continue for another year or so.

I stopped feeding DD1 at 2, but like Concordia said, she was down to a single feed to go to bed at night, had stopped the night feeds ages before and it was quite easy. plus I really had a big motivating factor; i was pregnant with DD2 and did not want to tandem feed, so i knew I had to stop during pregnancy.

but whilst I have a mental need to stop feeding DD2, I really cannot get over how useful it can be as a parenting tool.

I mean, DD2 was ill a few nights back, vomited and was shivering, temp went down to 34 degrees . Cue much breastfeeding in our bed basically all night. I am at atotal loss to think what I would have done if the boob had not been an option that night.

ikwym greythorne, i did consider keeping on through the winter for that reason, as last winter when DD was sick, bit dehydrated and ended up in hosp, i fed her all the time 24 hours or so, as if she was a newborn, and it worked a treat.

I know what you mean about it being useful. Though sometimes I suspect I only kept at it this long because fundamentally I'm quite a lazy parent and whipping out a nork is usually easier than anything else.

LOL at "whipping out a nork"

Someone on here wrote a stern message recently about "breastfeeding should never be used to stave off boredom in a child" and I was a bit "whooops!". It is my number one back up in case of boredom :)

with dd1 I had to stop suddenly because I went on meds that meant I couldn't - so that's what I told her. It had to work and it did.

With dd2 , I just told her I couldn't any more, with remembered gravitas from the last time. She also accepted it.

So I would recommend just firmness (for all concerned)

I cut my DS daytime feeds out when he was 18months. He was not a happy chap but with lots of distraction he got over it. He was always fed to sleep so when I cut out the day feeds the naps also stopped. I kept feeding him at bedtime till 21 months. Had no clue how to stop that one. Then one night I just cuddled him instead of immediately whipping my boob out and he fell asleep! Same thing the next night and the next. Job done. Though I think I got off lightly. He asked again when I had DD who is now 7 months. I just said it was just for babies and he was ok with this.

Good luck!

Quick update: breastfed DD2 when she woke up (ie breakfast) but then did not feed her again all morning, despite the clawing at my jumper, whinging and general grumpiness :(

By lunch time, she was so exhausted from being grumpy and having had no milk, she actually went a lay down on her bed spontaneously and fell asleep!

Only the second time ever she has taken a nap without a breastfeed first!

Seems like it really does require lme to have made the mental decision which she then picks up on.

Fingers crossed.

That's good greythorne, hope it keeps going well. i guess distraction and being firm / sticking to it is the key. i'm not much good at that though!