Hearing Christmas songs makes me sad

[Cupofteaplease]

I keep hearing Christmas songs on the radio and getting really weepy. I keep thinking of my Dad and how we used to love Christmas together. I'm finding it so hard to think of 'celebrating' Christmas without him for the first time.

Anyone else feeling the same? Fairytale of New York is catching me out whenever I hear it, which is ironic as it's hardly a joyful Christmas tune! (But was one of Dad's most favourites...)

My Dad died 10 years ago and my Mum 5 years ago.

Once again this year I found myself decorating the Christmas tree, weeping, listening to Dean Martin singing 'I'll be home for Christmas'.

Now though I find it strangely cathartic. My Dad would always announce 'ah, a blind man would be glad to see that!' as soon as the tree was finished, which I now can't help declaring.

He would also, without fail, stand in front of our heaving fridge the day before Christmas and grumble 'house full of food, nothing we're allowed to eat!'

This Christmas will be really hard for you but, eventually, it becomes lovely to celebrate the traditions you used to have and pass them on to your little ones (or maybe big ones!).

I, for one, shall be casting Nigella and Jamie aside to make way for my Mum's Christmas trifle ..... complete with tinned fruit cocktail, jelly and bird's custard.