Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

Original poster

My dad has died and I'm really struggling

5 replies

Autumnsunshine54 · 03/10/2026 17:43

My dad died 3 weeks ago and I'm really struggling. We had been really close but due to his actions 6 years ago (complicated, very traumatic event) we had had a tricky relationship in the last 6 years. I'd tried to make things better between us but never really succeeded. I cant believe now that he's gone. Probate and funeral both very complicated. Difficult family dynamics. I juat feel like I'm drowning. No partner and whilst I dont normally mind being single, I'd love to have someone looking after me at the moment.

OP posts:
helpfulperson · 03/10/2026 17:48

That must be incredibly hard. Do you have good friends you could reach out to support? I totally get where are coming from about generally being happy single but wanting someone in your corner in this situation.

Topseyt123 · 03/10/2026 17:58

That's very hard, and now I guess that you are grieving too for the sort of relationship you had lost with your Dad, but hoped to be able to get back to.

I can only really offer a handhold. A virtual one. I've lost two close family members myself this year (my DH and my elderly mother, within three months of each other). I am not on my own as I do have our three adult DDs, but in the midst of winding up two estates simultaneously is quite a long and lonely position which makes me feel weighed down by avalanches of paperwork.

Do you have some other family and friends able and willing to spend time with you and help support you? It's possible to be normally happy in your own company, but need someone with you in circumstances such as these so you know you are not alone.

ghostyslovesheets · 03/10/2026 17:59

I feel for you x Grief is awful and complex - can you access any bereavement counselling?

My dad died in May, very distant relationship, only two of us ‘responsible’ for all his stuff - he lived abroad and we didn’t even make the funeral- I found counselling has helped me sort through the conflicting feelings and the panic x

be kind to yourself and lean on support x I’m also single and I get you x

Original poster
Autumnsunshine54 · 03/10/2026 18:19

helpfulperson · 03/10/2026 17:48

That must be incredibly hard. Do you have good friends you could reach out to support? I totally get where are coming from about generally being happy single but wanting someone in your corner in this situation.

Yeah, I do have a handful of friends. I've contacted one to see if i can pop round tomorrow.

OP posts:
Original poster
Autumnsunshine54 · 03/10/2026 18:20

Topseyt123 · 03/10/2026 17:58

That's very hard, and now I guess that you are grieving too for the sort of relationship you had lost with your Dad, but hoped to be able to get back to.

I can only really offer a handhold. A virtual one. I've lost two close family members myself this year (my DH and my elderly mother, within three months of each other). I am not on my own as I do have our three adult DDs, but in the midst of winding up two estates simultaneously is quite a long and lonely position which makes me feel weighed down by avalanches of paperwork.

Do you have some other family and friends able and willing to spend time with you and help support you? It's possible to be normally happy in your own company, but need someone with you in circumstances such as these so you know you are not alone.

Edited

Yeah, I've got two estates to do too. Both complicated and £££
I just feel exhausted

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page