Anyone else already dreading Christmas

[Justanotherusername27]

Just that really. Lost my precious mum in March probably 20/30 years too soon. Christmas was always a massive deal for my family but now it fills me with dread. Anyone else?

My mum died in May this year. We lived quite far away from each other and didn't spend Christmas together but we had things we shared in the run-up to Christmas. She had a November birthday, and I have a December one. So every year for the whole of my life it's been her birthday, then two weeks to my birthday, then two weeks to Christmas. We'd always talk a lot around this time of year, planning what to get for each other's birthdays. I was in a card shop yesterday and couldn't help picking a birthday card she'd like (I bought it, pointlessly). Every year she sent me, DH and the DC a box of foodie treats for Christmas. We'd talk a lot on the phone and on WhatsApp, looking forward to Christmas. And she'd been looking forward to the Gavin and Stacey Christmas special. I'm having a bad day today and am crying at the thought of autumn and winter without her. It feels unbearable today, but I know I'll have better days when it'll feel easier.

@EveningSunlight I bought a birthday card for my mum too. Saw it in a shop, it has a beautiful painting design of lots of ladies swimming in a swimming pool. It's the perfect card for my mum. I'm not sure what I'll do with it when mum's birthday comes in October. I honestly can't put that specific feeling into words. Thank you for sharing. I hope you're having a better day🙏

We have booked a long haul holiday for 2 weeks - taking my mum. We didn’t want Christmas without my Dad so it’s cancelled.

@TashBear that makes me feel less weird that you also bought a birthday card for your mum. I'm sure she would have loved the card you've chosen her. I am having a couple of better days fortunately. I hope you are having good days too.