what do i say to my friend....

[plusone]

meeting a group of friends tonight for a drink one of whom miscarried twins over xmas. Ive only text and sent a card etc and said when shes ready to face the world and meet up etc let me know. This is the first face to face contact and i really do not know what my first words should be im not very good with these situations.

I would give her a big hug (if you are the sort of friends who hug each other!) and say something like "I've been thinking about you a lot since Christmas - how are you?"

But please make sure you mention it otherwise it will be a big "thing" hanging over the conversation until someone brings it up.

That's what helped me when I had a miscarriage anyway.

thanx tommy that really helps and was what i was thinking

I really agree with Tommy on this one. Please do bring it up, even if she doesn't. Otherwise you assume that people don't care about what you went through.

HI, I agree with Tommy please do mention it this will have been a huge thing for her. When I had my missed MC I found it very hard when I met friends after and it wasn't mentioned it was as though that baby never existed, which of course is not how I was feeling, and I am still feeling it now even though I am pregnant again my previous due date is looming.