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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

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Original poster

Is Despicable Me Too suitable for a newly bereaved child?

14 replies

harrietspy · 26/07/2013 17:54

My son's best friend - let's call him Adam - lost his dad very suddenly 2 weeks ago. He's 11 and his dad was in his early forties.

Adam is having a really tough time as you'd expect,, but his mum says it really helps him to spend time with my ds away from the house. Adam is one of 7 children and I want to do whatever I can to support him and his mum. They're doing lots of outdoor play but I'd like to take them to the cinema next week as well.

I want to avoid anything with massive themes of loss - just wondered if Despicable Me Too would be ok. Any thoughts?

OP posts:

pizzaqueen · 26/07/2013 18:02

not seen it yet but we saw monsters university too a couple of weeks ago and it was fab! I loved it as much as ds.

the three girls in despicable me one are orphans...

dontcallmehon · 26/07/2013 18:04

I saw it on Sunday and it doesn't focus on loss too much - it's quite an uplifting film.

taleteller · 26/07/2013 18:05

you might be better to go for the Monsters University movie which has just come out. Havent seen Desp me 2 but my DC have seen it and if I recall they said there was stuff about them getting a new "mother" - all very lovely and a good movie etc but maybe not quite right for your situation.

craftykits · 26/07/2013 18:06

We saw it this afternoon - this one focusses less on the orphans and more on getting the baddies etc, the 'orphaned' girls are now happy in their home so it's not so much about them. It was a good film though with lots of funny bits with the minions and some good lines. Don't know if that helps but I would prob have taken one of my friends girls who have recently lost their mum....similar age.

ArthurCucumber · 26/07/2013 18:06

The three girls are orphans and there's a part with the younger one being sad because she doesn't have a Mommy on Mother's Day. There's nothing else of that sort in it that I can remember.

SirChenjin · 26/07/2013 18:07

We saw it today, and it's very funny. There is a bit where the youngest is reciting a poem for a mother's day thing at school and gets quite upset at not having a mum (although it's just one small scene), and at the end of the film they are delighted at having a new mum. Tbh, I think it might be a bit much for him - it's difficult to say, but maybe better to err on the side of caution at the moment and see something else?

Sirzy · 26/07/2013 18:08

It depends how sensitive he is but I would probably pick something else.

Most of it would be fine and light hearted fun but there is the back story of the littlest chidl being upset at not having a mum and then being happy at the end when Gru remarries.

Original poster

harrietspy · 26/07/2013 19:09

Thanks so much - I think Monsters University might be a safer bet. I'd completely forgotten about the kids being orphans...

OP posts:

northernlurker · 26/07/2013 19:16

I think you're doing a really nice thing OP. Not easy to care for a recently bereaved child at such a tricky age. Good luck to you

NatashaBee · 26/07/2013 19:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

harrietspy · 26/07/2013 19:26

Thanks, northern, but it just feels like the absolute least I can do in the terrible circumstances. I'm so proud of my ds - he's only 10 and is being a lovely friend.

Adam and my dc are currently leaping about doing their own version of Gangnam Style after wolfing down pizzas. Lots of shrieking and laughing. I'm completely playing this by ear, but I suspect it's good for Adam to be able to laugh and not feel guilty, or worry about his mum...

OP posts:

SirChenjin · 26/07/2013 20:13

Poor lad

It will be a relief for him to have a break from his grief, and I hope you all have a lovely day

northernlurker · 26/07/2013 23:13

I'm sure it is good for him and it may seem like the least you can do but I'm 100% sure that what you and your family are doing for him now - being there at the worst possible time - is something that he will remember for the rest of his life. Good from you.

northernlurker · 26/07/2013 23:14

winstons wish website is very good btw.

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