Can anyone tell me what to write in a condolance card?

[MrsFogi]

This is the first time I've had to write one - it's for a friend of my mother's who's lost her husband after a number of months of illness, I know them both pretty well. Can anyone tell me what you normally write in sympathy cards?

I normally write

"Sorry for your sad loss" or "Thinking of you at this time"

Normally if it was anyone I am really close to I will also put a bit at the bottom saying if they need anything all they have to do is ask.

Yeah I'd do the same as FFF2

It's so difficult to put in words what I want to say, sorry seems so inadequate.

Well, my mum has just died and my dad and family have received lots of sympathy cards. The ones I like best describe how they remember my mum - specific or general memories, thoughts about what they thought of her as a person etc etc. Some people are also very good at expressing sympathy for the situation and providing comforting thoughts about coping with the future, but if you don't know where to start with that, maybe best not to attempt it! But I think it is nice to put something of your own thoughts and feelings rather than make it too brief.

Personally, I always write a letter and not a card. I say that I am sorry for their loss. Then I try to say something about the person's life, and then offer any help that might be welcomed.

If you know them well, it should be fairly easy to write somethign meaningful about what you appreciated about the person who's died and what you will miss about them. I agree with monkeybar really. the ones I appreciated most were the ones that made me cry - its part of the process of grieving.

Agree with harpsi too - I didn't put any of the cards I received up, it just seemed wrong.