In march 2011 my youngest daughter died in her sleep she was 13 months old and very healthy. she was walking talking dancing and had the most cheeky and beautiful smile. On the sunday night when i put her to bed she was fine we had a big cuddle and lots of kisses but on the Monday morning when my eldest woke us up for school we found her face down in her cot not breathing i dont really remember much other than screaming and waking my husband up and trying CPR but nothing worked, while i was in the ambulance outside with them working on my princess i remember looking at the house and seeing my other two daughters stood looking at us and shouting get them in side they dont need to see this. it all happened so quick but i went in the ambulance and my husband stayed with the girls until his mum arrived and then he rushed to to hospital. when we got home from the hospital i think the girls knew even tho we asked no one to tell them, because they didnt ask where she was. We sat them down and told them and tried to comfort them but we were in no state for much so our families took over with the girls. it has been nearly a year now and i know i am still not dealing with my grief but i am trying to be so strong for the girls. they are fighting more, crying over silly things, shouting at me if they dont want to do something, and really have changed so much. i understand in the same way that i am never going to be the same again neither are they but i suppose i just need/want advice on how to help them understand and cope with all of the things that must be going through their little heads. they are 6 and 4.
if anyone has any ideas i would be really grateful. thanks