sleep, eat and drink habits at 12 months? Your versions please!

[sleepylion]

Hi,

My angel of a daughter for the last 12 months has become the most out of control, helplessly screaming, miserable, tantrum fuelled child and I have zero understanding of how to get things back to normal again. For the last 2 weeks it has got worse, and I am losing my sanity and my focus. I fear of my actions. Besides that she has had 2 tummy viruses it seems. I am in the dark about what her babits should be at this stage, and am getting no response or support from the clinic. I'm a single mum. Alone abroad. I need some advice. She used to be in the most perfectly structured routine. She still sleeps through the whole night as always. But during the day there is a total lack of rhythmn and life is total and utter hell, with non stop tears.

Can those of you with a 12 month or approx 12 month year old please send me an overview of their sleeping, drinking and eating habits durng the day. How much fluid. What fluid? Food - what and when. Daytime naps - 2 per day, or is it better to switch over to one long nap in the middle of the day. Would like to hear a variety of success stories so I can assess what I should be doing.

thankyou, Lou

My DS2 is 12 months.
He wakes at about 7.30am
8am breakfast (weetabix mixed with fruit and milk) plus water to drink
10am ish - nap for 1 hr

12pm - Lunch and water

2pm - sleep for 1 hr

5pm - dinner and water
6pm - bath, stories etc
6.30pm - weetabix and milk
7pm bed

Between 2am and 5am he wakes up for milk (I know, I know )

Ds2's (12 months) routine (in theory) is roughly as below

7.00am wake up
8.00 breakfast
11.00 breastfeed
1.00pm lunch
3.00pm bf
5.30pm tea
7.00 bf and bed

He gets water with every meal and in between if he seems thirsty.

I try to stick to the above but as he is trying to drop a nap at the moment it frequently goes pear-shaped. Nap times vary wildly from day to day. It's always difficult when they go through a 'dropping a nap' phase. They don't really want that extra nap but can't quite make it through the day without it. I think ds1 also went from 2 - 1 naps at around 12 months. It wll pass

My DS is 1 in about 2 weeks. We've never done more than a loose routine depending on both of our moods and now I follow the general structure of what he does the three days he's a nursery. Overall though, I find he's different almost every week.

This last week he was up at 4-5am every day. He had a bottle and then went back to sleep in our bed. He had breakfast at 7am, fruit, toast and porridge...then most of my porridge. A snack and water at about 10.30 then a 40 min nap. Lunch and water (and half of my lunch) at around mid-day and another nap from about 1-2pm. Another snack at around 3pm with a full bottle. He had dinner about 6 (and a helping of my dinner) then a bottle before bed at about 7-7.30.

The week before he was up between 6-7am and had half a bottle. He sucked half-heartedly on some toast and waved his sippy cup around a bit. He threw his snacks on the floor and rubbed lunch and tea into table and his face. Had a couple of ounzes of milk at bedtime and that was it. Tried putting him down for a couple of naps, but despite being obviously tired he just spent 30 minutes kicking the mattress singing 'ya ya ya yahhhhh' before getting bored and screaming to be brought down.

Some days he's the happiest, smiliest most playful little darling you could imagine. Other days he's a whiney, bolshy and, frankly, irritating little so and so. I let him get on with it as much as I can and we seem to do ok, more happy days than grumpy so far.

ds2 is 12 months old.

He does this:

wakes 6ish - shares room with ds1 and one always wakes the other up

7 breakfast - cup of milk (barely touched), bowl of cereal and fruit

9.30 - brief nap (20-30 mins)

mid-morning - banana or biscuit

12ish lunch - toast, yoghurt, cup of water

12.30-2.30 nap

mid-afternoon - offered water, doesn't drink much

5.30 dinner - eats heartily. Has cup of milk with it (drinks half)

6-7 bath, stories, bed

Mine has gone from being smiley and laid back to an angry young man in the last few weeks. He is very close to walking, but can
't quite do it, and the frustration is dribing him potty (I remember ds1 doing exactly the same). Lots of tantrums over things too.

When DD was 12 months old she was sleeping 7:30 - 5am and refusing all solid food by throwing it at the wall/floor. Wailing loudly and walking into walls on a regular basis. Naps were whenever she tired of screaming and throwing things.

She's 2 and a bit now and it's all better. Thankfully, otherwise we'd have ebayed her by now

It does get better! The frustrations of being so close to being able to communicate/move effectively do pass too!

my ds is 12 mths and has started having tantrums, hardly eats NYTHING - THIS IS WHEN HE ASSERTS MOST OF HIS INDEPEDANCE. BFS ALL NIGHT - EVERY HOUR - NAPS TWICE ABOUT ONE HOUR AND HALF EACH TIME. COMPLETE RUMPELSTILTSKIN, USED TO BE VERY ANGELIC TOO.

i think its normal at this stage to be 'expressive'

sorry for caps, clumsy.

When DD was 12 months her schedule was:

waking: any time between 6-7 - 3oz formula

breakfast an hour later or at 8 at the nursery
weetabix or Plum porrigde with cows milk and toast

nap: at home from 9-10.30isch, at nursery random

lunch at 12-13, at home mostly a sandwich or something small, at nursery the full menue

nap: at home appr. 2hr, at nursery random times

snack at 4isch: yogurt, cheesestraw, muffin, scone, cereal bar

dinner at 6.30pm: either sandwich (on nursery days) or normal cooked dinner with us

Milk at bedtime at 7.30-8pm (3oz)

She drinks water at mealtimes and I offer her a beaker in-between, esp. after naps. amounts still vary between a couple of sips and 10-12oz a day. With 13 months I swapped to cows milk as I didn't think it made sense preparing the small amounts of formula esp. as she never accepted a bottle and was drinking from a cup.

As she didn't nap well at the nursery I kept the 2 naps per day until she decided she just needed one. That was with 17 months.

They have a growth spur at 1 year and can get grizzly. It wasn't too bad for us, honestly the 18-months one was worse (sorry, you don't want to hear that) but after 2 weeks world was back to normal. They learn so much in this small amount of time, no wonder they aren't always happy. Going out worked wonders for us.

Keep going, they are a lot of fun later.

Hi Loula - My DS just turned 1 on Saturday and I feel your pain. He's pretty much dropped his morning nap and now has an afternoon nap lasting anywhere from 45 minutes - 2 hours. In the past couple weeks he's taken to dropping much of his food on the floor (to the dog's great delight). We had a terrible 5 nights about 2 weeks ago when he was trying to figure out how to pull himself up. His brain was working overtime on that but he has since settled down. I can't imagine what it's going to be like when he decides it's time to walk. As for schedules, here's ours (on an ideal day):

0730 - Wake, BF
0830ish - Breakfast, usually porridge with fruit puree mixed in & water
1030 - Snack - banana or other fruit & water
1230 - Lunch - often something on toast with yogurt, fruit, water
1300 - Nap
1500 - BF
1700 - Dinner - meat, starch, veg, fruit - usually whatever I'm having
1830 - BF & bed

He often wakes up during the night for a bf. I'm trying to end these night feeds but since I'm currently a geographically single mom it's difficult - I often take the path of least resistance because I want to get back to sleep!

Oh Loula it seems we have the same child!

My dd is 13months (23.01.08) and I am due to have my second dd on 23.05.09! God help me thats all I can say.

My dd1 was a magical child up until 1 and after her 1st bday she turned! She grizzles all day, won't eat, I'm worried she doesn't like the food give her, she's started waking earlier etc.. for example today...

5am- woke up and gave her 7oz bottle
6am-9pm- slept in my bed
9.30pm- offered water and kind of yelled at me, refused her normal breakfast of weetabix and banana and had a piece of toast instead
10.30pm- ate a yoghurt
12.30pm- offered lunch ate one triangle of cheese sandwhich, bit of water....

1pm- off loaded to nanny's house

5pm- who knows!!!!!

also one habit that she has developed which really pisses me off is that evertime she wakes she screams until I go and get her and especially if it is a day time nap she's vile for at least an hour!

Before this phase she used sleep 7pm-7am then nap at 11am for 40 mins and then again at 3pm for 40 mins, now it can be anything from 2 hours between 11-1pm which I hate because she is moody all day or like today I have tried to inspire nanny to put her to sleep at 2.30pm... doubt she will though!!!!!!

My DS is nearly 11 months:

7:30am wake up, Breakfast. Cereal and 6oz of formula

11:00 - 12:30 nap

1:00pm fruit for lunch and 5oz of formula

3:30 - 4:30 nap

5:00 Dinner and water

7:15pm Bath time

7:50 8oz of formula and off to bed by 8:00pm

This is the basic plan but sometimes we have just 1 long nap instead.

Good luck

Hi Loula, DS4 was 1 on Sunday and his routine is:-

7am - wake up and have 3-5ozs milk
8-8.15 (has to be this time to fit in with school run) - breakfast of a one weetabix or bowl of ready brek. He will also nibble on whatever the over DSs are having
9.30 back to bed and will sleep for anything up to 2 hours (I catch up on housework)
12.30 - lunch of chicken/fish/mince and veg with fruit/milk pudding/yoghurt. Water from a cup
1.30pm nap of 60-90 mins depending on how long he slept in the morning
2.45pm I offer milk sometimes he will have up to 4ozs
5pm -tea of soup/finger food with a pudding of maybe cake/custard
6.45pm milk, up to 5ozs
7pm bedtime unless one of the other DSs has an actvity then he goes to bed after I have picked them up but always by 8pm

I know this seems like he eats a lot but he's spot on the 50th centile and has recently started crawling so he's on the move most of the rest of the time and he's a great sleeper at night

He's pretty even tempered so far but he knows how to shout if he's not getting what he wants. When the older boys are at home he's happy just to be where they are and join in the general melee. He cries when he's tired but that's about the only time.

I'm a great believer in giving babies as much sleep as they need during the day and I haven't found that it has a knock on effect during the night and if you don't have to go out (I know this isn't always possible) I'd say let your DD sleep esp as she hasn't been well and don't rush to drop the morning nap if she still needs it. I know Gina Ford isn't popular on MN but if you can get her books where you are the weaning one has lots of good recipes and will give you an idea of what kinds of foods to try and how much water to drink etc.

Like some of the other posters I've never given anything other than water to drink.

Sorry this is long

wow everyone - thankyou SO much for all your feedback.

This all goes to show me that I just need to go with the flow. And I feel relieved to know this is a very common phase with regards to behaviour! Mumsnet has saved my sanity a little !!!

Naps are varying so much. It's hard to know what to tell the nursery when I drop her off. Will just have to insist they go with the flow as well. Hopefully shell pick up more of a rythmn again soon.

She's become so impatient all the time. Feels like she bosses me around and pulls on my every nerve, and thats something I find hard to handle. I feel its general frustration, and also that she isn;t walking yet - I'm hearing from friends that it helps when they can start doing that.

I only recently switched from herbal tea to very watered down juice, which she happily drinks. I was just glad to see some fluids go in, as she was off drink altogether for a couple of weeks during the day and i was worried about dehydration. She also refuses to feed herself with a cup, and will only take drink from a bottle - fed by me! It feels like she should be past this stage by now. Any tips on that one?!

Can I ask what the reason is that you all stick to water? Maybe I should try going back to that??

Thanks!