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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

do you give your children a choice of what they want for tea or do you just give them what everyone else is having and they eat it?

58 replies

jojostar · 12/09/2008 22:40

I have always given my children 6,9 a choice of what they want for tea however this is beginning to be a pain in the arse as they want something different and we have 'no i don't want that, this, the other' I'm thinking that at that age I was just given my tea and I just ate it. I'm considering just doing that and have tried but they look at me like an alien has landed. Do I do the tough mum bit? Thats it or nothing...What do you do?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

MrsFluffleHasAWuffle · 12/09/2008 22:41

Get what you are given or go hungry I cannot abide faffing with food

NoblesseOblige · 12/09/2008 22:41

are you running a restaurant? or a hotel? unless there are menus and you are paid a salary - you are the boss, you choose the food - they eat it. end of

themoon66 · 12/09/2008 22:41

I always just shouted 'dinner on table'.

They never had a choice.

twinsetandpearls · 12/09/2008 22:42

She has what we are having or goes hungry unless it is something I know she genuinely doesn;t like. It has been confirmed on here now that I am a tyrannical bitch.

lilymolly · 12/09/2008 22:42

dd eats what we have- although I will ask her sometimes what she wants to have- so she is involved in decision but usually I just make what whatever me and dp fancy

Hulababy · 12/09/2008 22:42

I do the menu planning and cooking,s o on the whole I choose. I do ask DD (and DH too) when menu planning and doing the online shop what they fancy beforehand.

I would not be cooking several meals a day though, unless there were medical or allegy reasns, or vey specific dislikes.

Original poster

jojostar · 12/09/2008 22:43

ta think I'll go with the tough mum bit doubt they'll be skeletal anytime soon....

OP posts:

angrypixie · 12/09/2008 22:51

We have a family meal all eating the same - adults & children. For a light supper I might offer a simple choice e.g. beans or cheese on toast?

Elkat · 12/09/2008 23:00

I'll consult with the girls with what they fancy and offer choices on what I am prepared to cook... but it is one meal for everyone.

cory · 12/09/2008 23:58

We all eat the same.

I have told the children that I will make an effort to remember three food stuffs each which they really do not eat(though not basics like potatoes); these I will try to avoid, or if they are served they don't have to taste them. For ds atm I believe it is spinach, liver and Bolognese sauce. (no changes may be made to this list after the week's shopping has been done).

Other than that, they do at least have to try, and I do not cook alternatives. I really do not like wasting food - or my own time.

I should add that I do also try to remember if there's anything they particularly like so I can offer that from time to time.

Both dc's have gone through a fussy phase and emerged on the other side and now seem to enjoy their food.

bellavita · 13/09/2008 00:43

They don't get a choice (11 & 9). I am not running a cafe or hotel.

Pawslikepaddington · 13/09/2008 00:50

I always give dd a choice of two or three things I am wanting to eat-there are only two of us in the house though, so it's not like I'm cooking for a whole family. Sometimes we end up with weird meals-tonight I really wanted pizza and dd wanted chicken with rice, but then I fancied the chicken and rice and she fancied the pizza, so we did half each. Normally it's one meal for both of us though.

juuule · 13/09/2008 08:38

I tend to do mix and match meals.

sarah293 · 13/09/2008 08:51

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AnarchyAunt · 13/09/2008 08:56

DD (5.6) gets what she is given and if she doesn't eat it then tough. But I do make sure there is always something that she knows she likes on the table.

Why on earth should you run around cooking different meals for everyone?

herbietea · 13/09/2008 09:00

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likessleep · 13/09/2008 09:04

I've given up being vegetarian after 20 years for this very reason - I don't want to cook different meals.
Me and DH used to eat different meals, as he eats meat, but I don't want DS thinking he can dictate what he eats.
My SIL cooks 3 different meals for different family members and I just think I couldn't be bothered! Plus I am more likely to cook something healthy if I do just one meal.
Essay over

notsoteenagemum · 13/09/2008 09:08

We usually all eat the same however I will take suggestions when deciding the meals for the week.
If theres something I really like and the DC's don't I make their tea earlier and DH and I have ours when they're in bed, tey eat pretty much anything though.

sarah293 · 13/09/2008 09:40

This reply has been deleted

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paddingtonbear1 · 13/09/2008 09:45

dd has what we have, unless we're eating later than her (which does sometimes happen in the week), in which case she gets to choose, within reason.

juuule · 13/09/2008 09:53

Herbietea - I'm not sure how giving the choice of eating something they don't like or not eating anything avoids dislikes. Some children would rather go hungry with a choice like that. Although it does sound as though your children are not in that group.

As riven says - what's the problem with children having a dislike/like for something?

Buda · 13/09/2008 09:54

I feed DS around 5.30 or 6 but DH doesn't come home till 7.30ish and I usually eat with him so I do different things anyway. DS is pretty fussy so I tend to rotate things I know he likes.

SmugColditz · 13/09/2008 09:57

I take requests if it's food I like - ie might consider a roast chicken dinner for the family, would not do one for 1 five year old boy.

I don't serve sweetcorn or peas, and when I put onions and mushrooms in stuff I make them big and pick out-able

Once I serve it, it's eat it or wait until the next day (they might get an apple) because I don't serve food they don't like, but neither do I faff.

ByTheSea · 13/09/2008 10:14

We all eat the same. Sometimes I'll ask for a request if I'm out of ideas. DD1 doesn't like salmon but the rest of us do so she tends to have the sides and a sandwich when we have salmon, but that's about it.

aGalChangedHerName · 13/09/2008 10:18

I don't eat food i don't like and i don't expect my dc to either. Also wouldn't make them go to bed hungry if they are given something they don't like.

If i want fish(the dc don't like it) i eat later when dh gets in and feed the dc earlier.

I remember having to boak my way through meals i didn't like as a child and i still don't like them now so making food they dislike doesn't make them good eaters does it??

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