I’m posting because I honestly don’t know what to think anymore and I’m feeling completely overwhelmed by everything.
My little boy is 18 months old and he has no words at all and very little babbling. He doesn’t point or wave, doesn’t really follow instructions and doesn’t seem to understand much of what I say to him either. He also doesn’t consistently respond when I call his name.
He does communicate in other ways. He reaches for things he wants, takes my hand and leads me to things, reaches his arms up when he wants picking up and sometimes copies clapping. If I hold a drink in one hand and a snack in the other and give him a choice, he won’t point, but he will reach for whichever one he wants.
He’s also had quite a lot of problems with his ears. He had several ear infections between May and July and there have been ongoing concerns about glue ear/hearing. What has really played on my mind is that I feel like he used to babble more before he became ill, so I keep wondering whether his ears/hearing could be behind some of what we’re seeing.
The health visitor came today and we went through the ASQ:SE questionnaire. His score was 150, which I understand is high. She didn’t really say much at the appointment because she wants to go home, complete the scoring properly and then let me know whether she can refer him to the Child Development Unit (CDU).
I’ve since found out that the CDU waiting list could be around 18 months, and honestly that has terrified me. I know these things take time, but when your child is already 18 months old and you’re worried about their development, 18 months feels like an eternity.
He has a hearing assessment booked for Friday for VRA and tympanometry, so I’m hoping that might at least give us some answers about whether his hearing/glue ear is contributing.
I’m finding this all completely consuming. I’m constantly watching him and analysing everything he does or doesn’t do. Every time he doesn’t respond to me or doesn’t understand something, I worry. I find myself comparing him to other children his age and then feeling awful for doing it.
I don’t know whether I’m worrying unnecessarily, whether his ear problems could explain more than I realise, or whether there is something else going on that we need to understand. I don’t want to jump to conclusions or diagnose him myself — I just want to help my little boy and make sure I’m not wasting precious time.
So I’m really hoping to hear from other mums who have genuinely been through something similar.
Did your 18-month-old have no/few words, very little pointing or gesturing, limited understanding and an inconsistent response to their name? What happened?
Did you go through CDU? Were you referred to SALT or other services? If you had a really long CDU waiting list, were you able to get support while you were waiting?
And if your child initially had very delayed communication but things improved, I’d really love to hear that too.
I’m not looking for anyone to diagnose my son from a Mumsnet post. I think I just need to hear from people who have actually been in this position, because right now I’m frightened, exhausted and desperately hoping I’m doing everything I can for him. ❤️