How to handle attention-seeking and showing-off behaviour in a nearly 8yo

[thistooshallpassbutwhen]

Finding it hard to know how to deal with dd, 7 nearly 8 at times. She is bright, usually confident and makes friends easily. Has quite a lot of close friendships with other girls.
Lately though I notice a lot of attention-seeking and showing-off behaviour - talking in a very loud voice, clearly wanting people to notice her, sometimes trying to dominate conversations.
I have never forgotten an adult telling me not to show off at a similar age, and it really knocked my confidence. I had thought I was being funny/charming and it made me feel small and silly. I have a tendency to low self-esteem and self-consciousness as an adult, and I always vowed I would never tell my daughter not to show off.
But do I worry she’s a bit of a nightmare at times. I try to guide her in less shaming ways - pointing out when she’s being too loud or reminding her to let other people speak.
Any ideas how to handle this? Is it fairly normal for some nearly 8yo girls?! I keep hoping it’s a phase she will grow out of.

I think it depends entirely on the situation. There are some occasions when she will need to learn to be quieter but being exuberant and loud is also fine in others.

It's great that she's confident and also great that you recognise the potential damage in how you handle it.

Also, good for her!

@WishIStudiedScience Thanks for replying! Yeah I find it a tricky balance - I’ve always been keen to build her self-esteem and not shame her. But sometimes I worry that could go too far the other way if we’re not careful.

I’m not sure but you could point it out if you see an overly loud adult and have a conversation based on them rather than your daughter

@Nelly44 Good idea! I might try that. There is also a lot of very "performative" behaviour, e.g. putting on a fake voice, feigning more enthusiasm than she seems to feel about certain things, etc. I find it irritating/jarring but again, it feels hard to correct without shaming her. Guess I just wonder how typical it is.

Most probably this is a phase but it is always better to guide children what is right and what is wrong so you should always focus on her behavior and also notice the people she spends most of her time as environment also influences.