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What happened to my lovely sweet girl?

4 replies

Whitesock · 08/08/2026 21:06

My DD (14) was the sweetest, most delightful little girl growing up. She loved sports, did well at school and was very loving and caring.

Towards the end of primary school she started to get a little moody but we put that down to hormones. Only it never improved. Her behaviour over the last 2 years has been horrendous. She's constantly angry, mean, disrespectful, rude. There is not a single day when she has been nice to me. She has been in trouble at school more times than I can remember. Ive not had a hug from her for as long as I can remember. She's so cold towards me. I arrange days out etc so we can spend time together but she just spoils it every time.

She occasionally meets up with friends but likes to spend her days either in front of the TV or shut away in her room.

I was noticing some possible ADHD traits so I took her for an assessment but was told she is possibly borderline but no further action needed.

She's utterly filthy too, sleeps in the clothes she has worn during the day, her bedroom carpet and bedding are covered in food. She just doesn't care. Whenever I try and talk to her about her behaviour she won't engage. She will just call me things like a liar - because I have promised her things like a Starbucks for example and ive turned the car round and drove her back home as she has been rude.

I just don't know what else to do. Ive asked her if she feels sad or depressed but she just laughs and says no. Im really at a loss.

Any advice?

OP posts:
PurpleTurtleMoose · 08/08/2026 21:28

I'm so sorry you're going through this, it sounds utterly soul destroying.

I have to admit i feel like I was a bit like this as a teenager, and it was due to depression and very poor self esteem. Sometimes the people we love the most bear the brunt of the reaction because they're our safe place, and we can be more raw with our feelings in front of them. It's not pleasant, but maybe it's the one place she can be her sad, angry self.

Keep showing your daughter you love her, and I really hope that she comes around. It's so, so tough. Xx

Devilsmommy · 10/08/2026 08:15

She does sound like she has depression tbh. Though I don't know how you'd go about getting it sorted if she doesn't think she is depressed. So sorry you're going through this, it must be so hard.

omghereistrouble · 11/08/2026 13:33

Teenage years are so very hard. It might be time to revisit the Dr and maybe get him to refer you to CAHMS.

omghereistrouble · 11/08/2026 13:33

Teenage years are so very hard. It might be time to revisit the Dr and maybe get him to refer you to CAHMS.

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