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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Tidying of room

26 replies

Katymac · 30/06/2007 15:17

dd IS 9

We have done the
"let's all tidy the room together"
"bet you can't do it in 15 mins"
"look you show me & I'll tell you where to put it"
"if you don't do it you won't go to nanas/brownies/youthclub"
"if you don't do it you can't have pocket money"
"if you do it I'll give you more pocket money"

I am at the end of my tether

WHY WILL SHE NOT TIDY HER ROOM - her father is going to go balistic

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Sparkler · 30/06/2007 15:23

you have my sympathy

watching with interest

DD is now 8 and still won't do anything. Should have seen the fight we had earlier when I asked her to write some thankyou's for her birthday presents

charliecat · 30/06/2007 15:23

Try, if its not all done by 6 pm its going in the bin.
And once its done we can sit and watch XYZ or whatever.
Every 15 mins holler up...whatevers still on the floor is going in the bin. I will be checking under the bed.
Anything stuffed under there is going in the bin too.

AbRoller · 30/06/2007 15:37

I second Charliecat. I got to the point where I was fit to be tied and though I felt like a really rotten Mam, I binned the lot - anything that was not in it's place or some place neat at the least went in the bin. After threatening to do it several times she didn't think I'd do but she has never left the chaos that she used too.

She got all her stuff back the following week BTW

HTH

Tortington · 30/06/2007 15:38

sit on bed with book and brew. until it is done

charliecat · 30/06/2007 15:41

Also has everything a place? Books for book shelfs box for lego etc.
I also give them a box for anything that hasnt got a place.
So they go through lego/playmobil etc then theres a sort that later box.
BTW for most of the time you cant see the carpet. But when im sick of that I make them do it...like that.

MaureenMLove · 30/06/2007 15:41

dd is 11 and I've tried all those things! - Still didn't work! The most effect way I've found is to pile everything onto the bed that has to be put away somewhere. Then she knows that the only thing she has to do is clear the bed. I think sometimes, they just don't know where to start - so if its all on the bed, there's only one thing to do!

noddyholder · 30/06/2007 15:41

Do it together she is very young and it probably seems a mammoth task.Why will her dad go ballisitic?

saffy202 · 30/06/2007 15:50

DS1 is 13 and I'm forever nagging him until I explode then funnily enough it gets done
Tried telling him if he kept on top of it after it is nice and tidy that he wouldn't have as much to do but it goes in one ear and out the other. Have tried bribery, even resorted to offering extra pocket money but no joy.

Original poster

Katymac · 30/06/2007 15:54

noddyholder - she is very young????She has been tidying her own room for the last 6 yrs

There is a binbag of her stuff in my wardrobe from about 3 weeks gone that she can't get her room tidy enough to have back

Every bit of jewellry money etc left out in the house has been confiscated - and she hasn't noticed I have over £5 up there plus her christening necklace - which she hasn't admitted to loosing (necklace found behind toilet money built up from about 15/20 "drops")

OP posts:

janeite · 30/06/2007 16:38

DD is 10. about a month ago, she started letting her room get into a dreadful state. We made a star chart, with a reward to work for and the threat of binning one toy for each day it was untidy. Has worked so far.

MaureenMLove · 30/06/2007 18:47

Lovin your style Katy! I do that too. I left a note on the stairs once saying 'Management has the right to remove anything left on the stairs for more than 2 weeks, as clearly it is not needed or wanted!' I don't think 9 is too young either. We have turned a corner actually. She now has a mobile phone and if she wants credit on it, she has to earn money. So she gets a payday, the same as us and if she does her jobs everyday, she'll get paid. Its also in arrears, that way, I can deduct if things aren't done or she's naughty! I haven't had to clear the stairs, her bedroom or empty the dishwasher for 3 months now!

juuule · 30/06/2007 19:24

Close the bedroom door and pretend it's not there

TheLadyEvenstar · 01/07/2007 23:50

Katy, I too went through similar thing with my ds who will be 9 in july. So i after asking nicely for a week went into his room and threw away 16 bags of toys....ok he has too much and is spoilt lol. BUT it worked, he now cleans his room up after playing and volunteers to do other things around the home. He has always been taught to take his plate out from an early age, and as he got a bit older he got more odd jobs to do. for instance, he loads washing machine with his washing sets programme and starts wash, washes up after his breakfast and any other snacks he has through the day, makes his own bed, puts his clothes away when I have ironed them, feeds cat n fish everyday, cleans cats tray, hoovers his room and hallway. He doesn't get money for doing these things BUT he does gain the knowledge that a home needs to be kept clean. Pocket money is not a wage in this home it is a treat. But to be honest I don't give him pocket money, he knows he gets all he wants however I do save all the coppers up in 2 jars one for him and one for me, once a month we count it up and decide what we are going to do with it, so far he has £45 in coppers that he just wants to save.

Maybe I am hard but he is now capable of cooking himself and others a simple meal and loves to do this when his playmate comes up, he and her go into kitchen and he is teaching her how to cook. The way I look at it is one day he will be a man in his own home and I do not want him to be a man like his father who was not capable of boiling an egg even.

sparklygothkat · 01/07/2007 23:55

I do the 'whatever is left on the floor will be binned' too, as soon as that binbag comes out, they all rush around picking up their stuff...

bananabump · 01/07/2007 23:57

wow....how on earth did you manage to do that? And can you come here and teach my dp the same? seriously, I'll pay you!!

TheLadyEvenstar · 02/07/2007 01:15

Banana lol i have just taught him from an early age. well from when his father walked out to be exact and he was 22 months old then. At first it was silly things like take your plate out after dinner and put it in the sink, then it was rinse it under tap and it prgressed from there. As for hoovering he has loved that since he was tiny...am sure thats how he learnt to walk lol he had a toy hoover so he wouldn't nick mine. The rest has come naturally over the years. Cooking he has always loved, and when I first allowed him to cook himself some fishfingers (ok not gourmet) he was so proud of himself. now he cooks whenever he can, even if it is just helping me.

Original poster

Katymac · 02/07/2007 10:31

DD can cook quite well

But it just her room - which at the moment is spotless

DR Who was a very effective threat

OP posts:

TheLadyEvenstar · 02/07/2007 22:23

Ahhhhhhhhhhh Katy you have that amazing trick up your sleeve too lmao, I use that when needed....mind you we will be stuck for next few months no more Dr Who until Christmas Special lol

kickassangel · 02/07/2007 22:46

apparently madonna removes one outfit of clothing from lourdes room each day until it is tidy. she claims that someitmes her daughter only has school uniform left. true or not, i like the idea.

Original poster

Katymac · 04/07/2007 18:08

I think Dr Who would work better in my house

OP posts:

TheLadyEvenstar · 04/07/2007 22:41

Katy mine too.

Did you see last episode??? I watched it Saturday, Sunday and am watching it this friday. Mind you if i stopped him watching it I would be gutted at missing it lol right s'pose i better do my bedroom eh lolol

SconesandMajesticSandwiches · 04/07/2007 22:47

Admittedly DTDs are a bit younger at 6. I got sick of the clutter that built up day by day until you couldn't see their floor.

We tidied it together until it was spotless and everything had a home.

Then I made a star chart. If when they go to bed their room is spotless they get a star. Once a week they get a 'reward' if all stars have been filled for the week. They have had a reward for 5 weeks out of the last 6 (and the 6th was a 'ink on the carpet ssue' not tidiness). At the moment it is working well for us.

They are working well to tidy away their things daily rather than all at once monthly.

Original poster

Katymac · 05/07/2007 20:58

S&MS - we do that about 3 times a year...sorry

I didn't like the last Dr Who that much - it seemed a bit flawed

OP posts:

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House · 05/07/2007 21:30

Charliecat the only problem with your suggestion is my mum used to do to me nad i used to go round saying 'well that can go and so can that and so can that' and she used to get really p*ssed off!

TheLadyEvenstar · 05/07/2007 22:32

Katy....weren't you shocked to find that captain jack was the face of bo???

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