Clingy baby won't let anyone else look after her

[123naomib]

Hi all
Looking for advice. I have a 20 week old baby and she won't have anyone else look after her or she just screams. My dad has babysat for her twice and for the whole time (around five hours) she did nothing but scream and cry until she fell to sleep. Similarly my mother in law has looked after her and she just cries until me or my partner pick her up. The other day I left her with my mother in law while I went to the supermarket (for about 40 mins) and when I got back she was hysterical. My MIL tried to reassure me that she'd only been crying for about 5 mins but I know that wasn't true, she fell fast asleep when I put her in the car so I know she'd been upset for longer than that.

I also know the issue isn't anything to do with the people babysitting her as for example, if someone else comes to visit and picks her up, she cries within seconds. Even when I am stood right beside her. How do I get around this? She'll be going to nursery when I go back to work so I really need her to get used to being with other people soon or we are going to have hell when she starts. 😔
Thanks

Hi, sorry you're having such a hard time it's very stressful for you both! I think a good start would be having people round but not letting them pick her up if she doesn't like it. Not in a bad way but almost like a dog let them play and her go to them, it takes time but she will accept them in time. Also in regards to nursery try not to worry too much, they will be used to settling babies in and will work with you to make it all go smoothly.

Thanks for your reply. Yes I may start asking them not to pick her up, I haven't tried that yet. I was thinking that might be a step back but actually you make a good point that she might get more used to them that way. Thanks I'll give anything a go!

Lots of babies are more clingy at that age, it’s normal. It’ll pass quicker if you can offer more reassurance and don’t push socialising - it will pass! My DD was similar at four months but quickly resumed interest in people again.

Thank you for your reply. I've noticed she is happy to chat and smile and play with others, but when they try to hold her she gets upset, so just trying to focus on these positive interactions for now and hoping she'll grow out of it. I could really do with a babysitter soon so fingers crossed 😂