My 4 year old is out of control

[mychildrenaredrivingmemad]

My 4 year old DD is driving me insane. She has been biting and hitting for a while; me, her sister (mainly her sister) but it feels like since she has started school it has ramped up a whole new level. She throws things at me, screams, shouts, point blank refuses to listen to what I say or ask her to do. This evening this resulted in my having to manhandle her into bed (she is on a top bunk) and take the ladder away.

I don't know what to do. I've tried reward charts and tangible rewards. Nothing seems to help. Please can someone tell me how I can make this situation better because at the moment my weekends are a living hell.

Can you think of any particular circumstances/triggers that might set the behaviour off?

When I say no to the things she wants (for example more crisps when she has just had some, chocolate at breakfast) it if I ask her to do something (get dressed, brush teeth/hair)

There's a book called 'the explosive child' that often gets recommended here.