My 3 year old is out of control!

[1fedupmama]

Ok I understand that all kids push the boundaries but this is completely breaking my sanity!!
He has a severe attitude problem, all he does isn't fight with his brother. He bullies our dog! He's forever crawling about on top of her & pushing her etc, Our cat has had kittens which he terrorises. He sneaks out the gate & runs away (not seriously he waits till I see him then bolts thinking he's funny) he isn't only like this at home, others have started complaining about his behaviour & refusing to have him, which is putting further strain on me.
Tonight he has really pushed my buttons, firstly I went up to check he was sleepin got to find him in my room, makeup all over the walls & the dog covered in his skin cream. After a telling off etc he was put back in bed,.... then I went to check again to find him throwing, I repeat, throwing kittens about, to the point of one got caught on a coat hook on the back of the door and was stuck!!! I swear to god I could have killed him, what has that poor little kitten ever done to him!?!? I actually have no idea what to do with this child he is getting worse!! Help!?!?!?

Firstly, please don't leave him unsupervised with your animals. They need protecting until he's able to be gentle with him.
Have you spoken to your health visitor or GP, ask to be referred to parenting classes and also to have him checked to see if he is developing as he should be. Does he go to nursery? Do they have any suggestions? Tactics that work? If others are complaining it seems like it's time to get advice about how to move forward with his behaviour.

These incidents happen when he is supposed to be in bed, asleep. He isn't usually left alone with the animals. He is at nursery, they have no comments on his behaviour apart from he keeps himself to himself. But I have witnessed a few incidents of him fighting etc like he does at home & yet no one from the nursery ever mentions it to me, even after I ask about it they apparently don't know what I'm talking about. I've done a parenting thing (wouldn't call it a class) Parents as first teachers, it's was a great help with my oldest son, but none of it seems to make a difference with my youngest. I've tried naughty steps, time outs, getting sent to bed, grounded (no outside play, no tele no tablets etc) I've even tried a smacked bum & nothing seems to bother him! He could spend all day on a time out & every time he comes off he will continue his awful behaviour & get out back on & it doesn't seem to phase him. My next plan is contacting the gp again. It's now the school holidays, there is no way I am going to survive 7weeks alone with him at this rate!!

It does sound tough. Would you consider rehoming the pets?

He sounds like a real handful, unfortunately some kids are. Hopefully he'll grow out of it. Just reading your list it's all negatives, would any positive strategies work for him? Sorry I'm no expert but I wonder if you could do a bit of research about more attachment type, time in rather than time out strategies.

He sounds like a real handful, unfortunately some kids are. Hopefully he'll grow out of it. Just reading your list it's all negatives, would any positive strategies work for him? Sorry I'm no expert but I wonder if you could do a bit of research about more attachment type, time in rather than time out strategies.

The kittens will be getting rehomed soon but they are only 4weeks old at the moment. Don't think I'd have the heart to get rid of the others.
I've tried positive reinforcements aswell, ignoring the bad behaviour & rewarding the good, as health visitor instructed but that doesn't seem to have made much of a difference either. I'm stumped. I thought DS1 was hard work but DS2 is mission impossible in comparison x