I'm completely at end of teather

[MyPeriodFeatures]

DS1 went off to Dad's for a week for the first time (as per court order issued in Aug)

A happy settled 3 year old has come back, continually whinging, snarling at me, called me ugly - 'lthat's what daddy says' He's also talked about seeing pre-school at daddy's.

He also had a bruise in a non accidental injury site that has been checked and we've been opened, then closed to social care this week.

Social care were great and said write everything down as it may be that contact needs to be reduced as it will be emotionally harmful to your son in the long term.

I have had nightmares this week about his dad trapping me in a room and have also felt so overwhelmed when DS talked about Daddy showing him the pre-school that I've had the instinct to run, and literally have (I used to get this while we lived together when he was abusive)

I feel so so so so gutted, mine and DS life has felt calm happy and manageable, now I feel like I can't cope.

I totally understand why DS is bossy and angry and demanding with my but I'm struggling to cope with it to the point that I really shouted at him this morning. I then came downstairs and had a cuppa to try and calm down.

I've got loads of family support and support from nursery but I don't know how to get him back, us back, to the place we were.

I feel like the last 5 days have been really tough and im just appeasing a really demanding angry child and all the boundaries and calm have gone.

I feel like I can't put boundaries and routines back while we are this stressed and I'm in survival parenting mode. Using telly etc to get through the day

Could you not go to the police about the injury and then to court? As a way of protecting your son and stopping any immediate further visitation?

It sounds Dreadful and I feel for you.

There's no evidence of who did it. I've got it documented and think we will have to ride it out for a bit longer. Anymore issues and we'all be off back to court. If I go now then i''all look obstructive.

Unfortunately social care have rubber stamped the injury as NFa so I can't address this again.

My mum has had him for a couple of hours, even she's said he's really testing.

I ansolutly hate myself for shouting at him and seeing him cry. It's not his fault at all.

I can't bear it. I feel like he just needs complete full on attention which I can't manage as I need to cook, clean, pee etc.

He asked to sleep in my bed last nigh and he never does that. Ever.

I feel like I also almost disassociate with it all and that's not a good state to parent in...