Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

4 months old baby doesn't bat at toys

26 replies

bunny85 · 18/03/2016 17:25

Hi all

I'm very worried about my son who is almost 18 weeks old and isnt batting at toys. He isn't trying to reach for them either. He smiles a lot and coos and generally seems to prefer the company of people rather than toys which is not bad in itself but I'm sick with worry that he's so late. He of course is interested in them nevertheless, looks with interest etc but never tries to bat or reach. Anyone has any words of wisdom? Thanks a lot

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
GiveMyHeadPeaceffs · 18/03/2016 17:29

Was he prem? My ds is 9 months and 4 weeks prem and didn't really interact much with toys until he was about 5 months old. He gurgled away to himself, interacted and smiled as your wee one does. I wouldn't worry too much! And you'll hear this over and over again, all babies are different and learn things at a different pace.

bunny85 · 18/03/2016 17:32

GiveMyHead thank you, well he was born at 38+2 so not considered prem. Still earlier though. Do you think it could be the case? I thought about it

OP posts:
Questionsagaintoday · 18/03/2016 17:40

Children do things at different speeds. 38+2 isn't early. Anytime between 37-42 is an at term baby. The due date is simply the rough mid point of a due period.

bunny85 · 18/03/2016 17:51

Thank you Question. So that means he is late with this particular skill?

OP posts:
ACatastrophicMisintepretation · 18/03/2016 17:58

My little boy is 18 weeks and exactly the same! If I give him toys he will get involved for a second or so, teething rings a little longer, but generally isn't interested at all. I asked the HV last time I took him to get weighed and they said at this age they are more interested in mum and dads voice and face, he grins at me all the time and occasionally giggles at me too!

I try not to worry and just think that all babies are individual little things, mine is a sleeper more than a player definitely and I think he will be late in everything cos honestly, sleeping is just his absolute favourite hobby and I'm not going to keep him awake and make him play... Although I do feel guilty sometimes. Think the health visitor said a lot of babies don't take an interest in toys til 6 months so we have 2 more months before we need to start worrying!

GiveMyHeadPeaceffs · 18/03/2016 18:39

My ds was prem and the HCP's referred constantly to his "corrected age" as a reason for him not doing x,y and z. At 9 months he has no interest in crawling, standing or even sitting up whereas other friends dc's are doing all of these! I suppose my main advice would be don't worry and they really do all go at their own pace Smile

bunny85 · 19/03/2016 10:50

ACatastrophic, good to know I'm not alone! My little one also loves his sleep, even though it has been increasingly difficult to actually make him sleep (4 month sleep regression??). Otherwise you could be describing my ds! I really do hope he'll start batting soon as I'm getting really obsessed over it. Glad to hear until 6 months some of them are not interested in toys. Well mine is, but certainly prefers people still.

GiveMyHead thanks I'll try not to worry even though so far I haven't been very successful about it Confused

OP posts:
purpleme12 · 19/03/2016 13:16

My little girl didn't reach til 7 months. Yes this was very late for reaching but she was and is completely normal.I never worried. She was 5 weeks early but even with her corrected age that means she didn't reach til nearly 6 months.

bunny85 · 20/03/2016 10:19

Purpleme, thanks a lot for reassurance. Worrying so much and can't help it. Good to hear other people's positive stories!

OP posts:
scarednoob · 20/03/2016 16:50

What kind of toys do you have? DD started by batting at things on her play gym, ie they had to be dangling over her. she started reaching for other toys after this.

4 months really isn't that late, but if you are worried - and it is horrible worrying about little babies! - maybe have a word with your HV?

Zaurak · 20/03/2016 19:41

If they're alert and interested in looking at things then I wouldn't worry too much. Maybe she's more into faces just now?
Ds for example can roll over, I've seen him do it, but he doesn't, unless there's something in it for him. Whip out a boob within rolling distance and he's there in a shot, but mainly, he doesn't do it. Either he can't be arsed or he doesn't like doing it. My mother tells me I never crawled and she was worried, until the day I just stood up and walked off.

Mention it to your HV but if they're alert and engaging otherwise I'm sure they'll just do it in their own time.

bunny85 · 20/03/2016 20:42

Thanks everyone! This is going to sound really silly, but incredibly tonight all of a sudden and out of the blue he started swiping, batting and even grasping at first one, and then all other toys in his playmat! Such a coincidence that it happened right after I complained, I was so emotional when it happened, started kissing and hugging him much to my dh's and dm's amusement! I realise now he did grab at things in the past, my hair (many times) or his cloths, he also brings he hands together and sucks on them. Just the fact he hasn't been batting has been worrying me so much, now I see that you lot were right as always! Babies do get there in their own sweet time. Thanks for all your support and advices!

OP posts:
poocatcherchampion · 20/03/2016 20:47

In the nicest possible way, you need to chill out a bit. You don't need to monitor his every movement - there will be plenty of signs if anything is amiss. Otherwise just enjoy your baby!

ACatastrophicMisintepretation · 20/03/2016 21:04

Haha Bunny, coincidentally I was thinking about you and this thread today as my little boy has started grabbing this weekend too, admittedly it's not been for his toys but the wet wipes on his changing table but still! It's like they knew we were talking and worrying about them and wanted to reassure us that they're just fine.

Also, funny now that you mention it, my baby boy also grabs my hair, his muslin cloths and chews his hands and has done for weeks.... Talk about not seeing the wood for the trees!

Thank you (and everyone else)for helping me to reassure a worry that I wasn't really allowing myself to have

bunny85 · 20/03/2016 21:44

Poocatcherchampion, I know I need to chill out, everyone says that. The thing is, I had a very complicated pregnancy and it made me extremely anxious and watchful. I can be really ott sometimes. I'm working on it though!

ACatastrophic, couldn't agree more! So happy your little one has reassured you too. What mothers are like Grin Now that I think back and realise how many times he has grabbed muslins and his clothes and other things, and sucking hands and playing with them all the time, and I couldn't see it coming either! Could have saved myself few sleepless nights (but hey he keeps me awake anyway!). Good luck and enjoy your baby boy Smile

OP posts:
ACatastrophicMisintepretation · 20/03/2016 21:54

Thank you and you! Can't believe I forgot the hair grabbing... It really, really hurts! Thanks

poocatcherchampion · 21/03/2016 08:08

Flowers for you!

murphyslaws · 21/03/2016 08:12

As loads of people will say. Your baby will get there when they get there. Keep playing with toys and at some point they will pick it up. Mine has only just started to move along floor (not crawl) she is 10 months. Everyone was saying she should be crawling by now. She will get there when she can.

Don't worry Thanks

Ferguson · 21/03/2016 19:47

99.9% of the time YOU DO NOT NEED TO WORRY about progress, development etc. It will happen when the child is ready; ignore all these timetables and 'leaps' that so-called experts try and inflict on modern parents.

Give plenty of love, stimulation (but NOT over-stimulation), play in the park or garden, talk a lot and read, and not TOO MUCH screen time. Let the child set the pace and agenda.

Ohmyttre8 · 13/08/2023 23:40

Hi there. I’m sure there’s no way you’ll ever even see this message but in 2016 you posted something about your baby at 18 weeks or so not batting or reaching for toys. I would be so appreciative if you could tell me what ever happened after that. I hope you see this and will reply. Thanks SO much in advance!!

bunny85 · 31/08/2023 23:39

@Ohmyttre8 I'm so sorry, I only just saw your post! Of course I'm happy to share. What happened is that my older son is now nearly 8🥰 and is absolutely amazing. He's smart, really good at maths, loves reading and wants to become a scientist! As you can see, his slight (if any) delay at batting at toys as a baby wasn't a sign of anything significant whatsoever, in fact since then I had another baby and more experienced now😂 and don't worry anymore about this kind of things. I hope this was helpful? Happy to share any other info that can be reassuring 🙂

OP posts:
Ohmyttre8 · 02/09/2023 06:47

I’m very glad that your son is great! Also, thank you very much for responding. We have to all support each other at times. I truly thank you once again!

bunny85 · 04/10/2023 11:52

@Ohmyttre8 that's not a problem at all, I wish you and your little one all the best x

OP posts:
Strawberrybuba · 25/10/2023 20:04

Seeing this has really helped me, my baby was born early and just under 4 months of age and I have been so worried it's become a bit consuming! This has given me some peace of mind 😊

bunny85 · 17/11/2023 12:02

@Strawberrybuba that's so good to hear x

OP posts: