Run out of ideas for 11 year old daydreamer

[mumtogingernut]

My son has started secondary school and all through primary school he daydreamed, needed one to one to get him to produce any work and can't follow instructions without lots of help. He started secondary school well enough but has soon slid into being totally disengaged, disorganised and producing very little work. He can be distracted by his own heart beat. He has no learning difficulty as he has had numerous assessments. I feel useless at getting him motivated, he seems to think that he's good at IT so he doesn't need to bother with anything else. I'm frustrated, sick of nagging him and sick of school meetings telling me he isn't working etc. Anyone else with a similar set of characteristics in their child? What approaches improve it?

That sounds quite extreme OP. How does he present during the daydreaming? Is he fiddling with things, or talking about other things?

Fish oils are meant to improve concentration.

Could he have tasks broken down into very small steps? Or rewards for completing work?

The only other thing - and not said to worry you, just as a slightly out there consideration, but has he had an EEG to check that he's not having any absences or similar? (Can look like daydreaming, but can be hard to spot).

Daydreaming is sometimes a deliberate means of escape, " I can't do this, *. so I'll think about something else", rather than just inability to concentrate.

What do his teachers think?

(Where "this" could be anything that is causing anxiety.... School work, class room , whatever. )

Could he have adhd without the hyperactivity bit. It is a genuine condition that some kids have. Was he premature?

read up about inattentive adhd

From the NHS website
Inattentiveness (ADHD)

The main signs of inattentiveness are:
•having a short attention span and being easily distracted
•making careless mistakes – for example, in schoolwork
•appearing forgetful or losing things
•being unable to stick at tasks that are tedious or time-consuming
•appearing to be unable to listen to or carry out instructions
•constantly changing activity or task
•having difficulty organising tasks

Thanks for the ideas. We also thought his lack of eating or drinking is not helping concentration either; he is not bothered about food and so skinny. He was only a week premature. He's started music lessons at his own request, hoping that will help his self discipline and self belief; its one to one lessons of course so that helps. Never considered 'absences', would explain some things; think I'll keep a check on when he zones out and get him checked if it seems its more than just not listening. Don't know much about inattentive adhd, but I'm cautious not to medicalise it.