Even Christmas isn't cheering up my little pessimist

[PourquoiTuGachesTaVie]

My poor ds is worried Santa won't bring him the right presents, hated his nativity because the other children sang too loudly, didn't like the class Christmas party because he didn't win any games and hates winter in general because it's too cold and always raining. These are just today's complaints. It's not just Christmas that makes him sad, it's pretty much everything! If we take him on a day out then he could really enjoy himself but as soon as it's over then he will be miserable and telling you all about the things that went wrong.

I try to stay upbeat but my god it's hard work when nothing makes your child happy! He has always been like this, he was grumpy as a baby and as he's got older he's just got better at expressing his dissatisfaction so we have less tantrums but more constant low level moaning.

Anyone else have a pessimistic child?

Is he learning this from someone else in the family? Is someone else a bit negative in their language perhaps?

Even things like "It was nice but the ride down was awful!" on a regular basis can affect kids.

I have one like this. It's so bloody wearing.

It's more about days out. Like a moody teen. I've just lot my shit after a while and told her to stay in the car then. Obviously she didn't (she's 8). But I warned her that if she dared complain during the day we'd go straight home.

Ah fun times.

I suspect natural personality traits fall into glass half full/glass half empty.

However, I do think that for those of the later pursuasion vocalising their discontent can become a habit (and thus make negative feelings worse).

How old is your DS?

Is he old enough to reason with and discuss how the vocalising of his negativity makes everyone around him feel?

A bit like nose picking etc

You can't stop DC wanting to do it, but you can break the habit by making them waste how it makes everyone else want to throw up!

I allow mine a full five minutes a day of moaning. That's it.

Plus it's not nice for anyone kids or adults to express dissatisfaction when people or parents have put themselves out for them or done something nice.

I tell mine that he can think things in his head, but other than the five minute moan I don't want to hear it.
Also I repeat the old chestnut if you've nothing nice to say then say nothing at all

IMO you have to come down hard on whinging from early childhood. However, it's important to ensure that you aren't expecting a DC to engage in, and enjoy, activities to which he has no inclination.

He's 5 and if he has learned it from anyone it would be his father, aka Victor Meldrew. A five minute moan sounds like a good idea. I've been saying if you can't say anything nice quite a lot lately but I can see its hard for him to hold it in. I find myself being almost too cheery to try and counter the negativity!