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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Anyone else scared of telling people your DC's name?

21 replies

MB34 · 09/12/2012 11:46

Just wondering if it's normal to feel this way or does it mean that it's not his name?

DS is 2 weeks old and we think we have decided on a name but I'm scared to tell people and I don't know why!

Has anyone called their DC one thing, then changed their minds before you've registered them? How did family/friends react to the change?

OP posts:

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Bluestocking · 09/12/2012 11:49

Have you told anyone at all? Family members, close friends?

teaoclock · 09/12/2012 11:56

you're probably just nervous that you've made the right choice. its a big thing to name a real person and everyone will have an opinion. i was nervous too! not as bad as my cousin though, she changed her son's name 3 times. even once after he'd been registered. and we all went with the flow

sparklechops · 09/12/2012 12:00

I have just posted on another thread about this so sorry if I am repeating myself!

We announced one name when DD was four days old, then changed our minds and registered her as the original name we had decided during the pregnancy.

The announced name was very cutesy and we decided it was not strong enough to carry her through life. We also got a bit of a negative reaction to it. So we opted for our original, more grown up choice when we went to register her at six weeks.

Hilariously, the people who were originally critical of the cutesy name were then outraged that we were 'changing' her name. (in laws).

We got round the whole thing by using the cutesy name as her nickname and the longer one is used for official stuff and will be the name we register her with at school etc. We told people by sending out the name change in thank you cards.

The fact that you are not proud to say the name might mean you prefer another one. I felt like that too in the early days.

It is still such early days for you... you could easily change, especially as you have not yet registered the name. What do you have in mind?

ISeeThreadPeople · 09/12/2012 12:03

I loved both of my dc's names but you do feel a bit weird saying it out loud at first. I think it's the novelty of the situation. People come with names. So John at work is John and Aunt Maud is Aunt Maud. You never have to assign names to people. Choosing a name is a bit like choosing a whole identity and it's odd. And it doesn't fit at first because you're not used to it. It took me a few months both times for who they were and their name to fit together properly.

rachel234 · 09/12/2012 12:26

"Choosing a name is a bit like choosing a whole identity and it's odd."
Not sure about that, personally .

But I agree about it taking some time for a person to 'become' his/her name. Do you love the name you chose, does it go well with your surname, is it not already used by thousands others? Then I think you should be proud and confident to use it!

Wishfulmakeupping · 09/12/2012 12:35

I feel that way isee although little one isn't here just yet I feel weird when people ask about baby by name they know we have chosen, but that said I love the name, it's a big responsibility!

BackforGood · 09/12/2012 12:43

Well I have to disagree - if you are worried about what people are going to say, why would you inflict such a name on your lovely ds ? He's going to be having to give people his name when he introduces himself for the next 90 years or so.

RooneyMara · 09/12/2012 13:00

I feel the same....mainly because I want people to like it, I love it and I don't want them to look confused or embarrassed and feel they have to say something positivew when they really hate it.

It is unusual, a lot of people DO like it, but others have found it a bit of an interesting one to get used to....I think it is beautiful though.

And I'm giving him a less odd middle name so he can choose which he prefers later...lots of people disliked ds2's name, and that was awful, they just went silent when I told them. I've offered him the use of his middle name, too, but he likes his first name and is determined to keep it! Fine with me - and people are used to it now.

Original poster

MB34 · 09/12/2012 13:37

I've posted so many times about his name, you're probably sick of me being undecided! The name we've chosen is Tal.

Blue we have told some people and they've all been really positive about it but (and maybe in my hormonal state, I'm just over thinking things) I feel they're just being polite. Like Rooney said I don't want them to feel they have to be complimentary about it.

Sparkle I have grown to love the name even though it wouldn't have been my first choice but DH and I have had to compromise.

Maybe it's also to do with not being able to decide on his full name and my mum putting pressure on me/us that the name is too short and not to double barrell DS's surname!

OP posts:

DillyTante · 09/12/2012 13:49

I agree with the poster who said if you're to scared to say it imagine how your son might feel.

Bluestocking · 09/12/2012 14:52

I remember you! You're the poster with the Welsh partner. I prefer Taliesin or Talfryn with Tal for short - Tal just doesn't sound like a "real name" to me. If you feel apprehensive about telling people, perhaps you aren't really convinced it's the right name? I loved telling people DS's name for the first time, and was thrilled to see it written down in all its multisyllabled glory!

Welovecouscous · 09/12/2012 14:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RooneyMara · 09/12/2012 16:44

I think it's absolutely fine, for short - but I think you should probably think about giving him a longer name it can be short for.

It might easily get mistaken for 'towel' on its own

So it'd be helpful to have a 'proper' name with another syllable or two, for those tricky phone calls and so on.

But it's fine for short. I like Taliesin, as well.

sparklechops · 09/12/2012 16:53

I don't think there is anything wrong with Tal - I've heard much more 'out there' names at the baby classes we go to. (recently met a baby Thor).

However, personally, I would register him as a long name so he has the choice when he's older - you can always tell people later that he has a full name even if most people are calling him Tal. Then he has the choice when he's older.

The fact that you are stalling over announcing it suggest that you are not quite sure. Maybe have another think? There's no rush to tell people the name - he's only two weeks. Honestly, I felt rushed into our announcement at four days and regretted it.

squoosh · 09/12/2012 17:01

Oh please register him as Taliesen and call him Tal day to day. Taliesen is lovely and to be honest everyone he meets will ask 'Tal? What's that short for?'.

FriggFRIGG · 09/12/2012 17:12

Taliesen is a gorgeous name,Tal for short is great...

Welovecouscous · 09/12/2012 17:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

almapudden · 09/12/2012 17:38

Or Taryn? I love that name.

pinkandyellowbutterfly · 09/12/2012 20:15

I agree with the other guys, Taryn or Taliesen are both beautiful and underused names with a real depth to them. Tal is lovely as a short form of a longer name, but if it were me I'd be worried that my child would feel short changed. Its a bit like putting 'ron', or 'val' on a birth certificate its just not substantial enough for a complex human being.

MoelFammau · 11/12/2012 00:17

Tal is fine!

I took fucking months to get used to saying DD's name. It took hearing other people say it repeatedly for me to accept it.

Give it time.

persephoneplum · 11/12/2012 04:56

Your baby, you name him what you want. If Tal is enough for you, then Tal it should be.

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