I actually think we may never, ever find another baby name which fits our criteria. What are yours?

[Psammead]

I am British. DH is German. We live in Germany but spend a lot of time in the UK.

The name must be pronounced very similarly in both languages, if not the same. This means no 'th' sound, no 'j', no 'e' at the end. R can also be a problem.

The name must also be spelt in a logical way that comes naturally to both languages. C and K can be problem letters here. As can Z and S, and sometimes C and Z.

The name cannot be too modern or too old-fashioned in either country. Fashions in the two countries do not correlate with each other.

It should not be too biblical, too nerdy, should not be the name of people we know, or people we disliked at some point in our lives. It can't be too long, start with an M, or have any negative cultural associations.

It would be nice to have a nice nickname potential, and a not utterly hideous meaning.

Oh and it can't be French. Or too British or too German.

I think the next one will be named Bob. Regardless of sex.

Tell me about your criteria!

Must be the name of a past king of Scotland.

It's a simple yet very awkward criteria.

Alexander for both of you, then!

I suppose it depends on how many sons you have, OvO!

Typical conversation in Casa Psammy

Me: James?
DH: Too butlery.
Me: Benedict?
DH: too popey.
Me: Rory?
DH: too... Rory
Me: Ah. Hector?
DH: too....
Me: Troy-ey?
DH: Exactly.

Edith, we can't use it. I like it a lot, but it's a no-go.

I can think of quite a few, although of course I have no idea of any personal associations which may rule them out. But you aren't asking for suggestions, are you?

Do it, Percy! Hit me with 'em.

Oliver
Oscar
Ben
Dan
Sam
Karl
Peter

Thanks for the suggestions.

Thomas
Robert
Patrick
Dominic
Christian
Philip
Frank
Ralf

Susanna
Anna
Karin
Andrea
Diana
Sophia
Barbara
Christina

probably none of them are any good for various reasons.

No criteria of my own, but suggestions:

Linnet

Hector

See, a lot of these would work, if it wasn't for my DH.

Is The Perfect Name decent grounds for murder, do you think?

Personally, I would have loved to have had a name that was pronounced slightly differently by either side of my family, like Angela or Brigitte, say. It would be like having a choice of two names.

:(

Anton/Antonia

Ours is something which is Scottish and/or Irish.

Must not be too hard to spell or pronounce.

We had a boy and a girl and that's it, we can't have anymore because we can't agree on a single other name in the world other than those two. Except maybe Daragh but since we might have a girl I couldn't possibly risk it as I almost murdered dh when choosing dd's name.

I am not sure. I have an American friend here with a Jakob. Whenever I see them I say 'hi there Ja, yay, j, y, Acob.' She says either will do, but I always trip over my tongue.

Plus I couldn't bare the odd looks we would get when introducing the child here with the English version. Small town.

Leftmylistletoe, hooray! Someone understands!

oh, i share your pain.

same set up (I am British, dh German). same issues re: name 'working' in both languages (and ideally in French too, as have family there as well).

I am expecting number 3 soon. we are struggling for names, to say the least.

dh currently liking Dominic, which is ok imo, but doesn't grab me. girls names are a real problem, so better hope for a boy.

See, I like Dominic, but DH made disgusted noises.

We named DD Lucia, thereby circumnagivating any German v. English problems.

dh hasn't lived in Germany since he was very young, so is not bang up to date on name fashions, which may have something to do with it.

I could live with Dominic. I quite like it. But dh wants to spell it Dominik, which is an absolute NO! from me.

we have 2 dds, and neither of them have names that are pronounced the same in both languages, but the names, and the name connotations are ok (although my uncle hates dd2's name - thinks it is awful and we should never have saddled a poor child with it. mind you, he thinks Dora would be a better option )

See, this is why I gave DH a shortlist of names and told him he could pick anything he liked from the list. Worked a treat even though he picked my bottom of the list name

it's good for winding up inlaws, though.

with both the last pregnancies, I hinted very strongly to my MIL that Heidi was my all-time favourite name, and I would love to call my daughter that, etc. (I do actually quite like it, but not sure I'd use it, iyswim?) MIL all but fainted with horror, and thus when each of the girls was born was so relieved that I hadn't committed the hideous crime that she has been quite complimentary about their names

Pixie, you genius. Sounds brill. Might try it.

I like Heidi too! Couldn't do it, though.

Oliver. About 50% of the European bilingual couples I know have an Oliver.

Gregor

Otto

Luther

Tobias

Andreas

Albert or Anna

Anthony or Helen