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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Girls named after their Mother... What do you think?

28 replies

HappyWifeandMum · 22/04/2011 06:19

We have some friends who have several children, including boy/girl twins. They named the boy twin after his father, and the girl twin after her mother. First name for first name. Just always seemed a bit strange to me... I totally agree with the concept of naming sons after their father, but it just seems odd to have a daughter named directly after her mother. Do you agree? Would it be any different if say they gave the daughter the mother's middle name as a first name? Should any part of a mother's name ever be given to her own child? What are your thoughts?

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nooka · 22/04/2011 06:29

I don't think that giving a child the name of either parent is a good idea personally. That you feel it is fine for a dad but not on for a mother is however a very strange point of view. Perhaps you could explain it?

cupofteaplease · 22/04/2011 06:34

' I totally agree with the concept of naming sons after their father, but it just seems odd to have a daughter named directly after her mother. Do you agree?'

No. I can't see a difference. If it's ok for the male then why not the female? I think it's unimaginative to name both children after both parents though!

Original poster

HappyWifeandMum · 22/04/2011 06:38

Actually I cannot... I started this thread to try to figure out why in the world I would feel that way, as admittedly, it is very self-contradictory! I think it just seems natural to me for sons to be "Jr's", but a bit odd for a mother and daughter to have the same name. I was hoping your input could help me sort it out! :) Thank you!

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dexifehatz · 22/04/2011 12:21

Boring and unoriginal.

Cattleprod · 22/04/2011 12:25

Arrogant and egotistical on the part of the parents.

Women are usually more sensible. That's why it's more common for sons. Horrible, horrible tradition.

Tuggy · 22/04/2011 12:28

It's just as stupid and ridiculous for a mother/daughter as for a father/son

You cant say it's fine for one not the other!

Whatevs · 22/04/2011 12:49

Doesn't bother me in the slightest. It wouldn't be my choice, but I can't see the harm in passing names down the generations. Not everyone wants to be 'you neeeeeek'

Bue · 22/04/2011 14:49

It's a silly idea, but it's equally silly to name boys after their fathers.

thumbbunny · 22/04/2011 14:51

Stupid idea.
But am very at you being ok with the men doing it, but not the women.

Perpetuallypregnant · 22/04/2011 16:03

I am pretty indifferent. I wouldnt do it myself but my DS does have my Grandfathers names as his mns. I liked the names anyway, if I hadnt I wouldnt have used them.

I really love the name Kate but its very similar to my own name and so I chose not to use it.

4pudding · 22/04/2011 16:21

Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith went similar but opposite ex, Willow and Jayden. Only occurred to me the other day.

TrillianAstra · 22/04/2011 16:23

I don't like naming children after parents.

But if I thought it was ok and normal to name a son after a father, it would be equally normal to name a daughter after a mother.

It's not though. It's weird.

Emelene · 22/04/2011 17:15

My friend's middle name is her mother's name. I think it's OK, but personally I wouldn't do it and if I wanted a "family" name I would use it to pay respect to a particular member of the extended family.

NorkilyChallenged · 22/04/2011 17:25

My dad and his sister (first boy & girl born in the family) were named after their father and mother respectively. It didn't strike me how weird that would be til I had my own kids... I personally wouldn't like it but think it's been pretty standard practice historically for a long time.

I do agree that the same applies for father as mother, don't see any difference there at all.

CarefulWithThatAxeEugene · 22/04/2011 17:47

Silly? Stupid? Ridiculous? Arrogant? Egotistical?

If people like their own names enough to pass them on, what business is it of anyone else's? At least they've road-tested the names themselves! It's a damn sight more honest and practical than giving their offspring a ludicrous name that is likely to make them a laughing-stock.

nooka · 22/04/2011 18:53

I think in practical terms it just doesn't work very well, and if you have both parents and two children even more so. The result is likely to be that the children aren't actually called their given names at all and end up being called 'junior' or 'baby' or some other horrible non name. Or they get 'little / wee / young' added to the name which I also dislike.

I like the idea of using family names, and I'm OK with parents names as middle names for their children, but prefer going up at least another generation. My dd for example is named after two great grandparents, so she has a bit of family history without being over shadowed or there ever being an confusion. Her name is very much her name, not a shared name.

It's a total straw dog to suggest that if you don't use your own name for your child you have to choose something outlandish or made something up - there are hundreds if not thousands of tried and tested names to choose from.

CarefulWithThatAxeEugene · 22/04/2011 20:58

It's a total straw dog to suggest that if you don't use your own name for your child you have to choose something outlandish or made something up

Oh, come on, that's not what I said. I said it's better than one other possible route, not that there aren't any other choices.

(You did mean straw man, I take it, and not straw dog )

nooka · 23/04/2011 01:54

Oops yes I did get that wrong. It didn't seem quite right at the time, but I got diverted into thinking about the movie and wondering why it was called that and didn't think to check.

I wasn't just responding to your post though Eugene, someone else also brought up unique names, and I think it is a bit irrelevant really.

Original poster

HappyWifeandMum · 23/04/2011 02:04

So let me clarify, so I understand the general consensus here... If you don't really like your mother/grandmother's name but are OK with it, then it is good to name your child that name, but if you think your folks did a great job of naming you and love one of your own names, then using that name is tabu, because it is not generationally removed?

(BTW, on the Will Smith and Jada P-S note, we also have some friends who did the same thing... The father's name is Victor Jesus, the mother's name is Emily Jane. They named their children Victoria Jane and Emilio Jesus. Interesting... Not my style, but interesting.)

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Original poster

HappyWifeandMum · 23/04/2011 02:15

By the same token, if your name was Claudia Bernadette, and you didn't care much for Claudia, but had always loved Bernadette, would it be off-putting to name your child Bernadette?

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ohnoshedittant · 23/04/2011 02:29

I think the general consensus is;

naming children after their parents isn't a very popular choice.

it's no different for boys/girls. Either it is ok to name after the mother/father or it isn't. To say it's ok for fathers/sons, but not mothers/daughters is really very silly.

That's what I concluded from all the posts....

nooka · 23/04/2011 04:55

I don't think that anyone has suggested it would be a good idea to call your child a name that you don't like. I think that ohnoshedittant summed up the responses pretty accurately.

I don't think there would be anything wrong with using your middle name for your child (assuming it's a nice name), but most people I know who like their middle names but not their first names are known by their middle names.

everlong · 23/04/2011 06:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bonsoir · 23/04/2011 07:01

I think that in the interests of drawing clear boundaries between parent and child that parents' first names should not be used for their children's first names under any circumstances. The practice of naming children after parents seems positively medieval to me. Modern psychology hates that practice.

ChildofIsis · 23/04/2011 07:44

In my family daughters are given their mum's middle name or version thereof.

My dd4 is the fifth generation to have this.
We think it's a lovely tradition and one that includes a lot of thought about middle names, they're going to be around a long time so need to be something timeless.

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