I am getting married shortly. In my group, it is usual for people getting married or going on maternity leave to receive a card and some kind of gift (everyone puts some money into a collection).
Since I announced that I was engaged, I have been treated like absolute shit by some of the top bosses. My assumption is that they think I'll immediately TTC and so they want rid of me now. On the back of this, I decided that I didn't want a card/gift from the team. I felt that I really did NOT want to receive their so-called "good wishes for the future", as it would be completely phony.
I've heard that the "office girl" (who always organises these things) has gone and organised a card and collection anyway. I am absolutely furious. Would it be unreasonable to tell my colleague that she has to get rid of the card and return any cash? Or would that just look ridiculous? I am just so so cross about this that I can't decide what the reasonable, mature thing to do is! Advice please!