This is burnout, right?

[cautionmindyourstep]

I am exhausted. Stressed. Anxious. I work in the charity sector. Fairly small organisation. Wearing many hats. Had a big deadline recently (3 months ago) that led to me piling up 60 hours of TOIL. Even before this I was feeling pretty shattered. Initially I thought the deadline had just taken it out of me. But I feel awful.

I feel completely detached from work. I could stare at my screen quite happily all day and do nothing, but obviously can't. I can't sleep. I feel completely overwhelmed and find no enjoyment in the job I feel like I loved a year ago. I can't think straight enough to actually do my work to a high standard and find myself quite tearful at times at the start of the day. I then find myself logging back on in the evening and working until silly o'clock to catch up on what I genuinely just couldn't physically do during the day.

Somehow, my manager doesnt seem to have noticed, and seems quite happy with my output.

I feel this is all compounded by the fact that I am a single parent to a child with additional needs, and I also have ADHD. I have told my work place I have ADHD but it isn't something I really like to talk about so it hasn't been a discussion beyond that.

I just feel like I have hit a brick wall, and I dont know what to do as I dont see a way to fix it. I am exhausted. I feel mentally more than physically. I can still go out running and I feel a sense of relief when the weekend arrives, it's just my brain that feels like it has shut itself down.

Other than this, I am actually quite happy. My child is amazing. I don't have money issues. I am fit and healthy. Find joy in exercise and my friends. I just can't cope at work.

Does this sound like burnout?

I also work in the charity sector and hear you.

Yes you are burned out. Have you been to the GP? There are medications hat can help.

I've just started my first job in education. I have ADHD (diagnosed) and probaby AuDHD. It's part time and I started managing my stress before I started as I know how this could go. I've been burned out before.

It sounds like you are now. If you keep pushing through you are going to make yourself really ill, and take a lot longer to recover. You need to rest. So take some time off right now, or go off sick and speak with your GP. Do not worry about the job, why should you? They're piling so many extra hours on you without checking in on how you are, and it's not your responsibility. I'd start by telling your manager you've done too much, and need some of that TOIL now to recover, and go from there depending on the reply.

What would you say if this was a friend telling you this? I bet you'd say look after yourself and your family first.

The deadline is over. You’ve built up the time.

Now is the time to take it back. Other team members being off sick is not your problem to sort. Or if it is (ie you are the senior leader responsible for hiring!) then get an agency on it today to find short term cover.

You need some time to recover before you get worse and have no choice. Right now it looks like you can take a step back in an orderly fashion, that’s better than it all blowing up one day without planning.