Dh sulking after my work night out

[Neversureofanything88]

How would your DH react in this situation as i'm not sure i am in the wrong but he's making out I am.

I have been away two days (one night) on a company offiste event. Timetable roughly as below:
Wednesday
Dropped kids at breakfast club at 730
Mad dash for bus and train and then 1h45min train journey
Got to event had to help set up, welcome people, engage with people etc
Helped support and run session for 200 people. Socialising all day
Event finished at 1700, back to room for quick shower and change
Meet direct team at 1800 for drinks
Black tie dinner and awards ceremony. Being on hand to help and support with awards and IT issues.
Dancing and drinking most of the night (didn't over indulge on the drink) but bed at 2am

Next day up and down for breakfast at 8am
Back to function room to help tidy up etc
Train journey/bus home
Got home around 3pm
Had work to finish off
Dh comes home, finds me on sofa working, moans that I have come straight in and worked and not done anything around the house (without acknowledging that I u loaded the dishwasher he hadn't done in the morning before work, and left every light on in the house when leaving to drop the kids off)
Make it through until about 9pm and absolutely exhausted. Go to bed
Dh upset I didn't want any 'quality' time with him (basically I didn't want sex as I was exhausted)
He wakes up at 5am this morning, tries it on again, I still say no so he goes to work

Hes now in a mood over everything tonight. The fact I worked until the time I am meant to. The fact I didn't hear when he said something when he was the other side of the kitchen. Everything. All because I said no as I was exhausted.

For context, I probably have had 1 work night out this year. He has had several, always comes home drunk as his don't involve overnight stays etc.

He’s a pig
no two ways about it
Thoughtless , mean and hypocritical

He's a twunt. Men who sulk and strop if you say no to sex are so unattractive and unimpressive.

I divorced such a man child op.
Twas very liberating...

My DH would have said "happy days?" and looked after children and home.

Another stroppy man.
You need to go more often OP. He needs more practice at parenting and running a home…in preparation for when you LTB.

Op he sounds utterly utterly awful and there is not a shadow of doubt in my mind when I tell you, you would be far far happier single. This sounds like a horrible horrible way to live. I can’t think of anything about being single that would be worse than this.

What a pigheaded twat.

Is he always like this?

I can’t tell you how my DH would react, because I divorced him and a billion times happier. But I can tell you that after that I would have been exhausted. I would have come home to my two gorgeous teenage girls, where we have an understanding in our house, that if someone wants alone time, they get it, instantly, and for however long, no questions asked, no one is offended. I would have ordered pizza (although my youngest might have made me a homemade mince type dish as we do that for each other when we know the other is knackered). I would have had a shower, and got in bed as soon as I could.
I’ve been single a while now, there is nothing on earth that would make me go back to a life as you describe.

You're married to a selfish arsehole.

He sounds grim OP.

I’ve just read it again and see that you’ve actually questioned whether you’re in the wrong or not. I’m sorry op, but of course you’re not, what on earth would you think you did wrong here. It is deeply sad that you have to question if this utter cunt is reasonable, because what must your life be like if you have to question this. Please op, please get out now.

He thinks you're his maid and sex worker and he's mad that you did your job instead of the ones he's assigned you to.

Are his arms or legs broke? No? Then he could have picked up the house and turned off the lights and taken care of himself when you said no to sex rather than complain and sulk like a fucking baby. He's an asshole.

Oh come on - clearly the marriage is circling the drain and this is just yet another incident to add to the long list of examples of tension between the pair of you and him behaving like a dick

Got home around 3pm
Had work to finish off
Dh comes home, finds me on sofa working, moans that I have come straight in and worked and not done anything around the house (without acknowledging that I u loaded the dishwasher he hadn't done in the morning before work, and left every light on in the house when leaving to drop the kids off)
Make it through until about 9pm and absolutely exhausted. Go to bed

Where are the kids in all this?

You were working at 3pm on a work day - what does he think you should be doing at 3pm on a work day? The offsite you’ve been to sounds exhausting and to get back and catch up on your work (that presumably you’re a bit behind on) is admirable, not something he should be moaning about!

For contrast, our teen is out so we had the rare opportunity for a bit of intimate time.

But I’m tired and just not feeling it. So I said sorry, not now. My husband just smiled and said he knew I was tired. No mood. No criticism. No sulking. No being a wanker because he can’t get his end away.

If your husband’s behaviour is always like this when you don’t want sex then you have a problem. If it’s a one-off then maybe you can have a chat and make a plan to get together when you’re more up for it.

Do you normally do all the care around the children? And is he annoyed he had to do it?

Anyway, anyone who tries to wake me up at 5am for sex will get told to f-off. If he's moody about it, he can get told to f-off again. What a child.

This is bordering on sexual abuse and coercion… bin

I would say that since the op had to question if it’s ok to say no when one is absolutely knackered, she has unfortunately moved far on from bordering on.

Did he have to do some actual parenting OP? I'm assuming he's unhappy that your work is actually impacting him for a change.

He smiled do you want abit of my sandwich remind of the song Down Under. Thats a good partner men are too reliant on self and as long as theres equal boundarys. The OP's partner has none zero and alcohol is a habit which leads to alot of marital issues.