To ask you to make me feel better about my wardrobe marlfunction…

[Forwardthinkingcrayfish]

…by telling me yours?

At Waterloo Station the other day. Backpack on. Halfway up an escalator and a lovely man taps me on the shoulder to kindly tell me that my dress was tucked underneath said backpack.

Bright pink pants on display (I usually wear black but Sod’s Law!). At least dozens of people would have seen before I was notified. Argh!

The man was so nice, though. Restored my faith in them a little bit!

And apparently, I cannot type!

In a club many years ago, added padding to my bra which was fully making a break for it. Under UV lights glowing away. No-one said a thing.

I have often seen this happen to women on Tube escalators but have generally been able to tell them at the top.

It often seems to happen with a heavier bag (duffel or similar) worn over the shoulder and a lighter fabric skirt. The bag combined with the movement pulls the skirt up.

This is why I have never been keen on the ‘just wear your summer dress with tights in the winter’ idea!

The outdoor rapids at a French Center Parcs were my nemesis.

I had forgotten my swimsuit at a holiday beach and walked back to the carpark for it. I unlocked the car and decided that I would just slip my suit on in there, as it was the middle of the day and everyone was on the beach so the carpark was quiet. Which would have been a good plan except that I hideously tangled the crossover straps and ended up half naked, just as people arrived back at the next car…

Formal dinner. Black velvet button through shirt. Turned on my chair to speak to my male colleague about the guest speaker. Entire front of my shirt pinged open leaving my colleague with a full view of my glorious cleavage & bra.

Anonymity would have been preferable. He still mentions it 20 years later.

I’d just started a new job and this was in the days of fax machines - all faxes had to be collected from Receprion downstairs. So after a full morning of being shown round the offices etc and introduced to various people, I was told to go and pick a fax up for my boss - and it was only when I collected the fax that the receptionist mentioned my dress being tucked into my knickers at the back. So I’d been introduced to everyone all morning looking like that and nobody mentioned it.

Only stayed at that job six months and never really felt at home there. I wonder why!

I went on a lunch date in a foreign country with a man I really liked. Very posh restaurant. I only had a limited grasp of the language.

i was wearing wide linen draw string trousers and went to the loo. As I was tying the draw string back up the bloody string broke in half, giving me a clown trouser look. I spent the rest of lunch trying to pretend that I didn’t have my very wide trousers tucked into the top of my pants whilst my lunch date gave me very odd looks.

Black tie dinner at one of the City guild halls. Beautiful 1950s dress. Split up the back as I was leaning across to grab the wine. As I walked hurriedly past industry colleagues to the loos, it split more and more until it there was only a foot or so left and I was having to sidle along with my back to the nearest wall.

Happily, there was a sewing kit in the toilets so I laboriously sewed it back again. Took me so long that I missed dessert 😞