AIBU for worrying about this road rage

[FollowMrSpoonz]

Today I was driving along a 20mph road. I was driving a bit above 20 (Speedo 25 so probably 23) and the car behind me was aggressively tailgating me. They eventually overtook me and sped off.

About 3 mins later I approached a roundabout and spotted them in the queue waiting to go right. I was going left so drove alongside them in the left lane. We were stationery next to each other. I looked at them and did a sort of shrug gesture (like “wasn’t much point in you overtaking me, it didn’t get you very far”). This obviously wound them up, they proceeded to nose their car very close to me, honk their horn, then opened their passenger window and threw a hard object at my car. It must have been an open drink bottle as my car was wet where it was hit. No obvious damage, maybe a small scratch but that side of the car already has a few scratches from when I scraped it 8 years ago and never got it sorted.

We then both entered the roundabout and went on our separate ways. My 11 year old was in the car and was a bit shaken.

Obviously I now regret my little shrug action but I don’t think it warranted their reaction! It has really wound me up. AIBU for feeling stressed about this?

You are not responsible for their behaviour

you ‘shrugged’, you did nothing wrong 🤷‍♀️ It’s not ok that women (i assume you are one) are constantly being made responsible for others behaviour.

Shrugging was a bit pass agg and although you aren't responsible for the other person's behaviour you will perhaps come away from this incident understanding that every action has a reaction.

Just ignore these things in future, my DH always wants to let them know he's annoyed, they don't care and they are probably bigger and younger than him. Be safe.

I don't know what you were trying to achieve by your shrug. You got your answer, luckily they didn't go too far. It isn't right but there are people who are spoiling for a fight. Don't give them cause when you have your child with you.

I tend to find that people like that want a reaction, so don't give them one.

That's not to say their behaviour is your responsibility tho, no one should ever react violently bc someone shrugged.

What would your reaction be if she was a he?

really don’t see the relevance to be honest . Someone overtook her, didn’t cause issues, she then made a gesture that was unnecessary.

no harm, no foul

Yeah I was a complete idiot making any gesture, I accept that. Not necessary and there’s no situation in which it would have gained anything.

We were both female.

Lesson learned - always rise above it. Also overtake me if you want! It was the very close tailgating that wound me up and the fact their dangerous driving didn’t get them anywhere quickly. Just not necessary. But agree, neither was my reaction.

You're not an idiot, it was a natural reaction. She's still the one that was 100% in the wrong.

Unfortuately most of us find that out the hard way, too. Try not to react, ignore the bastards and imagine how sad and unhappy they must be.