To ask nursery to limit nap time?

[CerealEater1]

Hi all,

My son approx. 1.5 years old, goes to nursery 4 days per week from around 8-4pm. I’m happy with the care they provide, but am a little frustrated with their policy around naps which is that they wont actively interrupt them, though they may try talking around them or making the room less dim. Issue is my son sometimes naps for 3-4+ hours a day there between midday and pick up, then he won’t go to sleep until like 10pm and is really tired in morning. On days he’s with me he will just have an hour or so in afternoon and then go to sleep around 7:30/8pm. I’ve asked them to limit naps but they won’t diverge from policy. Anyway, just wondering if I’d be unreasonable to try and insist a bit more that they wake him…or do I just suck it up? I guess he’ll grow out of this at some point. Thanks!

I think nurseries had to change to this policy as it was enforced by OFSTED.

We used to ask them to do this with DS. He had a few bad nights and then made up for it at nursery which meant he didn't sleep well at night and just became a continuous cycle.

They were happy to wake him up after a certain time

4hrs sleep is crazy

most seem to limit naps and have 12-2 ish

make it clear you want him woken

do you always wake at home if only has an hour

at his age I would say anything 2/3hrs is normal but I’ve always woken up by 3pm latest so have 4hrs + till bed at 7 ish

I had this with my son’s nursery and it caused split nights where he would be awake for 2-3 hours at night. I told them to cap him at 1hr 30 mins as I wasn’t safe to drive and it was impeding my ability to parent my older child. I said I would get a letter from the GP if necessary.

they said exceptions could be made based on individual circumstances and now they wake him by the 90 mins mark.

I gave up with them on this. Once she got to about 2 she wasn’t napping at all with me. At nursery wld have 1-2 hour naps sometimes nearly 3hrs! Then I’d have her up until 10/11pm at night and or restless overnight.
I wld always say at drop off please don’t let her have a nap and if she does no longer than an hour as she’s up ridiculously late if she naps.
They stopped putting it on the app that she had had a nap and then she’d tell me herself. Actually was quite funny (well kinda) coz she showed them up too. She would come out and first thing she wld say to me is “I had a nap” and start laughing, right infront of the nursery worker.

Some nursery’s now have a no wake policy as they believe children need to sleep for their development. It’s crazy I know! but maybe they are following this new practice?

Strange how nurseries can be so different, ours has always done whatever the parents request and are always happy to adjust it. We’ve just rolled the latest time they’ll let him sleep until forward by half an hour so he’s got a longer wake window before bed, and they won’t let him sleep longer than 90 minutes (previously it was up to 2 hours). In another couple of months we’ll probably be dropping this down to an hour.

The only slightly annoying bit is that at home he naps 12-1:30 and there it’s 1-2:30 as they don’t put them down until after lunch, but they knacker him out enough to mostly offset the later wake up time.

That would piss me off tbh

mine only has 20mins now (he’s 2years 3 months) he doesn’t nap at all with me and goes to bed at 7

but even this 20 mins pushes him to 9pm bedtime which is annoying enough - but he can’t last with no nap in the nursery so I just ask they cap it for me ! they have a chart with all the times each child needs to be up and they follow it 🤷‍♀️

if he napped until he woke he’d easily sleep 2 or 3 hours

don’t think it’s an ofsted rule

My first two sons went to nursery. I had them be woken by 2/2:30pm. Otherwise I would be up with them until midnight. And have plenty of wakes between midnight and morning, it was killing me.
if they’re asleep for 4 hours in nursery that makes the nursery workers job way easier and yours way harder. That’s not what you’re paying them for ?!

They need a nap of 1-2.5h as part of 11-14 total sleep hours in a 24h period.

I think it’s very convenient that nurseries have decided that children need not to be woken from sleep, which leads to them sleeping the day away at nursery (fewer children to run round after at any given time) and then they don’t sleep at home for the parents who’ve been at work all day.

I can’t believe it’s better for children to be up late into the night due to sleeping for so long during daylight hours, rather than to be spending the day time doing activities and playing with their friends.

PS my children are much much older so no current skin in this game!

Insist they wake him after two hours. 12-2 or 1-3 is a perfectly reasonable schedule for a nap. 3-4 hours is not.

They are being lazy. It's one less toddler to run around after for them.

If they won’t deviate can you ask them to put him down quite a bit earlier? He might not be as tired and therefore won’t sleep as long, or at least he will be up earlier and have a longer time to tire himself out before bedtime? Thankfully ours have been happy to wake but I’ve had friends in a similar situation.
our nursery stops all naps at 3 anyway when they move into the older group so they try and do some phasing from 2 when they enter toddlers. Appreciate yours is younger but shows not all nurseries are the same.

I have the same issue with my nursery. Is it an English thing? We’re in Scotland but my nursery is an English hq’d chain. I’m told it’s policy not to wake but none of my friends in other nurseries have this issue.
my eldest would be awake till midnight if he even had 10 mins over the limits I set.
now I think my youngest (2y3m) needs capped at an hour so he’s not up at 5am but I know I’ll have another fight on my hands. I pointed out last time not waking wasn’t following GIRFEC because how could it possibly be good for the child to nap 2hrs 1-3 then be awake until 11pm then knackered the next day.

I would have to change nursery over this. I have heard they do it about in America. Ofcourse it makes the nursery workers job a whole lot easy if all their charges are sleeping!

if my DD isn’t worken by 1.30pm she is awake until 11pm and knackered the next day. It is not an ofstd rule that they can’t be woken. It is just a policy some (bad) nurseries have.

Unreal.
4hrs of sleep in childcare how is this ok.

I would hate to be waken from a nap so never did unless we had no choice and no wouldn't expect then too kods sleep when they need sleep

It’s extremely annoying but staff have to follow nursery policy and can’t make an exception just for your child

I would 100% change nursery over this, it’s outrageously lazy of them and having a detrimental impact on him (and you!).

Change nursery

In they wouldn't work with me I would change nursery. 4 hours. It's wild.

I had to ask for this, and if the nursery had said no then I would have changed nurseries!

My daughter’s nursery will wake her up after an hour but they aren’t allowed to wake her up before that. I think that’s reasonable

I don’t think they are allowed to limit naps any more….