AIBU to hate being called darling all the time by DH?

[RantingMenoWoman]

DH won’t stop calling me darling. It feels like it’s becoming every other word, I fucking hate it! I find it inane and patronising! I’m sure he’s ramping up the darlings too, and he’s currently unaware of how much I dislike it (I was rather hoping it’d finish as suddenly as it apparently started.)

Before I snap, AIBU and it’s my hormones rather than my husband?!

Has anyone else developed a strong irrational hatred of what is generally thought of as a term of endearment?

True.

Mine calls me Love.

He’s Black Country and it’s the norm here but I hate it. I tell him, he stops, he forgets and starts it again.

My 12 year old literally thought my name was Love until she was 5.

Call him snookums every time he does it.

Or she could be an adult and tell him she doesn't like it. He's not a mind-reader!

My dp, when we first got together, queried why didn't I call him darling. So I do now. It's a term of endearment. But if you don't like it, tell him! 🙄

Maybe tell him you would prefer if he used your name and that it’s starting to feel insincere as he’s overusing darling. Good luck 😉

Mr Pony calls me, "Darling" or "Beautiful". I bloody love it.

Because hormones can make you feel even more fucking irrational.

I find the quickest way to stop any of my lot using irritating words or phrases is to segue into an 80s or 90s classic song that contains the phrase.

Oooooh, good tactic!

Have you… spoken to him yet?

Maybe it's like a vicious cycle. He's calling you darling more frequently thinking it's being supportive when he suspects you're feeling a bit 😡😤. When in truth it's actually making you feel 🤬😡😤🤯🔫

My husband calls me darling and I hate it….have reminded him that I actually have a name ! We have been married for over 30 years and he has used my real name only about 20 times ever ! It feels so impersonal using a name that’s not my name 😩

Start calling him sweetheart or poppet see how he likes it.. hope it doesn;t backfire though and he loves it!!

So unlike the OP you have explicitly asked your husband not to do this and yet he just ignores and cracks on?

After reading another thread that refers to a woman calling her partner " A Greedy Warthog" Darling doesn't seem so bad now!

He's patronizing and doing it intentionally. Tell him stop it and start calling him Henry lets see how he feels

How on earth do you know that??

The Op has never mentioned to him even I. Passing that she doesn’t like it

Mine calls me hen or darling (both scottish) I just reply what arsehole? Or yes/no arsehole. 😆 🤣 😂

Jog on as its seems your more concerned with others comments

Sorry?

Come back @RantingMenoWoman and tell us his response when you finally mention to him that you don’t like being called darling!

Mine calls me 'Sweetheart' in a patronising way if I have failed to grasp/remember something which he thinks I should know ie ' It's the blue bin that gets collected today, sweetheart ' . I could wring his neck.

I agree. We dismiss 'hormones as being something that derail our true 'personality'. In my experience hormones have a profound impact on how we feel and act, after all they are strong drivers of evolution . Post menopause I am definitely less 'caring' or obliging. In evolutionary terms I'm probably supposed to be dead by now and I think sometimes my husband wishes I was!😊

Told him! He looked a bit flat, but it also looks like he didn’t realise how much he was saying it. Didn’t say I hate it and find it tediously patronising (particularly when used so much), I used an example of some friends of ours who are now divorced who used to say it to each other in increasingly heated arguments.

🤞 it’ll stop now, or at least to a sensible level.