Do you look up exs on social media?

[lalalagarden]

I’ve never done this as always had the opinion you leave the past behind and don’t go looking. With a group of women having a coffee today and most of them routinely look up the lives of previous boyfriends, some going back to school.

On their encouragement I looked up the boy I went to school with who was my first love. Turns out he moved to wales, married with kids and is now very religious. Certainly didn’t expect that! But it unnerved me linking to the past like that, though not sure why.

So is this a common thing?

AIBU - everyone does this
AINBU - mad thing to do, leave well alone

I never, sometimes i think what their lives are like but never try to find them on social

Yes I think it’s pretty common to have the odd gawk. I think it becomes an issue of it becomes part of your daily routine.

I think it’s natural curiosity. Unless you have a reason not to like a traumatic break up. I have done it, it doesn’t evoke any feelings.

By this thinking, guys must look me up then? Wow. Or is this more a female thing? I’ve got a pretty low social media presence anyway and nothing of any real interest to see.

I did when I was younger

eta I’m 41 now

Well my last 3exes are Facebook friend s with me anyway so I don't feel the need

I've honestly never done this. I'm too scared of hitting the wrong button and liking something by mistake.

I have but I weirdly felt sneaky like it was cheating behaviour and I deleted the searches.

Apparently if you snoop on a Facebook profile they then get your profile in their "friends you may know" pop ups.

Oh I’d hate that. That someone knows you’re snooping on them.

I have done out of curiosity

I did recently because he had some pictures of my dog that I lost

Only via a Google search so I'm not looking with my logged in FB account, too worried about hitting the wrong button 😆.

That’s just a myth

Be careful if you look up an ex on Facebook, you’ll appear in their “people you might know list”, do you want to remind them you exist? If they appear in your “people you might know list” they’ve had a look at your profile, or tried too.

I maybe did when social media was first invented. But then I looked up tonnes of people in that initial enthusiasm- when you used to “poke” people on Facebook and friend everyone from your secondary school class.

But then I’d probably looked for them already on Friends Reunited! 😂

Yeah ive looked. I dont make a habit of it though.

My first husband left me for his secretary.

This was back in the day before the internet.

I did have a curiosity Google a few years ago and I discovered she had left him at some point (serves him right) and she was eventually left by her next husband (serves her right).

I don't wish either of them any ill will, but it was a satisfying trawl through Google, Facebook etc.

I haven't googled either of them in the intervening years...... but now I am curious again 🤣