To leave most of my jewellery to DD

[JaceLancs]

Inspired by DIL and jewellery thread it’s made me think
I have DS and DD - both adults - my will splits everything equally between them
We’ve always joked about who gets what else when I go - they get on well and always have, so never envisaged it being an issue
DS a while ago requested a few pieces of jewellery which are more unisex and family things like my DGF signet ring and DF wedding band
I naturally suggested everything else went to DD as I now have a DGD who would eventually get it but there’s a huge disparity in value
The few pieces DS wants would be less than £5k the rest would probably be valued for well over £75k which doesn’t seem fair
I have a large collection of antique pottery and heaps of Lego which one day may be worth something so could even it up that way or am I just overthinking this and just leave them to sort it out between them

Watching with interest. I’ve got beautiful rings, bracelets and necklaces from grandparents and my husbands grandparents (he is an only child) and I have a boy who wouldn’t be interested in those and my girls would. However they are likely worth a fair bit and certainly would be a gap like yours so watching with interest on this one

I would leave it to them to split as they see fit, whilst you have enjoyed adding to your collection of jewellery, pottery, and Lego, those left behind may not want the whole collection of whichever one.

I think you are overthinking it.

It’s stated in my Will that my DD is to receive my jewellery. The children decide between them who gets what house contents when the time comes.

My DD is to allow my boys to select one piece of jewellery each with some pieces excluded that I definitely want DD to have.

Everything else is to be divided equally.

I only have a few pieces worth anything and nothing like the value you have. My son gets his Dad’s wedding ring and my DD my engagement and wedding ring - none worth more than £1000 individually. My DD gets an emerald and diamond ring that was my mothers. The rest they can give away or whatever.
Frankly if you own jewellery worth over £75k the rest of your estate has some value? If I passed away today, my kids will get, after IH, about £500k each. The smaller items: car, artwork etc they can agree between them. I don’t think you need to even up every thing, but you could say, for example, your car goes to your son which might offset the value of the jewellery a bit?

If it helps my mother left all her jewellery to me. I knew before she died, she said it was because she didn’t want my brothers giving it to their wives, so it ultimately stays in the female family line. Since one of them got divorced, she had a point.

My grandma left her jewellery solely to her daughter and then split the rest of the estate in 3. This was essentially because she didn't want any of her sons giving it to their wives and then getting divorced. (She corrected predicted the divorces.) The value wasn't what you are talking though.

I think it's difficult either way, because jewellery is lovely but perhaps not as directly useful as cold hard cash. So I think it depends whether you'd mind your daughter selling it?

With family jewellery I find it more about the sentiment than the value. When we lost my grandparents we chose the pieces we wanted, I have no idea what any of it was worth as we have no intention of selling them

When Mum and Dad died, my sister and I just decided between us who got what when it came to personal possessions. Value didn't come into it - no idea what anything was actually worth. We just chose items that we particularly liked, and didn't fall out over it.
I wouldn't worry too much.

Can you say you want them to get an equal split of assets, with the jewellery being counted towards your DD’s half (and if you have any other pieces you want to leave specifically to your son, those go towards his half). So they get the same in the end, but keeping hold of the specific things you want to pass down.

I don’t think you can leave one the jewellery and the other lego

perhaps have the stuff valued and make sure son gets £75k more from the estate

Alternatively, start giving it away now?

Same, daughter will get my jewellery, probably only about £12k worth so just a small amount of the estate.

If your ds has a wife by then (and / or a daughter), perhaps leave some of the jewellery to them?

My DS is the only GDS of my parents. Lots of GDDs. Jewelry is going to the GDDs with a token gold coin going to my DS. It's fine. Not everything in life will be equal. If my dad had a classic car, pretty sure DS would get it (he's a classic car fiend) but he doesn't so that's that. If I owned a Monet, it couldn't be split between 7, I'd have to leave it to one person. That's the way it goes, sorry I couldn't afford to buy 7!

Get the jewellery valued and ensure your DS I
is given that additional value from the estate. Yes, prices will change but get them revalued in 10y or whatever.

Or if you're minted, buy some sovereigns to a similar amount as the jewellery is currently valued & leave them to him. Split the rest 50/50.

But I wouldn't give your DD a tidy chunk of gold & then gift your son the guilt & inconvenience of either storing or offloading large amounts of plastic bricks and pottery.

There is another way around this. Specify the distribution of any sentimental or family pieces, then stipulate in your will that the rest be liquidated so the value can be divided equally. If you have 75k in jewellery then it’s highly likely that your estate including property will go over the 325k threshold and require professional chattels inventory and valuation anyway.

Jewellery will go to my daughter 💯.
Your DS can take the lawn mower and any power tools hanging around. I would never give mine or my mother’s engagement ring to my DS.

It’s pretty normal for jewellery to go down the female line. As it’s family jewellery intended to go onward to granddaughters then the value is somewhat irrelevant, as they hopefully will never be sold.

Unless your Lego collection and pottery is worth approximately £70k, I think this would be unreasonable.

£80k worth of jewellery becomes family wealth not something sentimental that you leave to your DD just because it's jewellery. It's highly unreasonable to leave her that without allocating equal value of the estate to your DS.

DS is gay so no future DIL and has never wanted children either
I quite like the idea of buying gold for DS, and he can certainly have my car
Another option I’ve considered is to take out some extra life insurance and make DS the sole beneficiary
I’m not that wealthy - just love jewellery and prioritise buying it over other things

I got all my DGM jewellery from DGF when she died as DM had little interest in it and he knew how much it meant to me - he bought DB a car instead

Start handing over now and keep to the female side all female jewellery and male side male jewelry.

My mother inherited jewellery from her MIL, on the basis it would pass to me (my aunt has no children). When my Mum died my brother was a bit miffed that it went to me and there was nothing for him/his wife.

The way is see it is that I’m simply the custodian for the next generation. There are no girls in the immediate family, so it will eventually go to any DILs/granddaughters if I’m lucky enough to have any.

Tricky - it's hard to say what to do, as although I can see why you want to pass it to your DD, it's not all that fair on your DS, as DD will have had £75k worth of jewellery. If you adjust this in the will, by giving DS an extra £75k, then that's not really fair either, as DD will probably feel obligated to keep the jewellery (and may want to anyway), but doesn't have the monetary benefit of it. Also, if your estate is over the inheritance tax threshold, the jewellery will need to be taken into account for that, and tax paid the value.

I'd speak to your children. If you pass the jewellery to DD with the caveat that it may not be sold, but has to eventually be passed on down the family line (can you do that in a will - I'm not sure), then that would be fairer.

I do think with regards to jewellery only it should be passed down the female line.

I have 2 nice rings (4k each) but no daughters or granddaughter. I have 3 nieces so it has crossed my mind what am I going to do with them?
Giving them to future DIL's seems wrong.
Maybe I will have some granddaughters in time.