AIBU to worry about second pregnancy

[pennyforthoughtsx]

Ive just found out today that I’m pregnant with my second. I have DS 19 months and a stable long term relationship.

We’ve always spoken about having a second but now it’s real and happening. I was really happy when I found out this morning but now I’m starting to get worried just down to the financial side of things.

We’re fine with how everything is going now but we all know how expensive new babies are. My main concern is we are renting a 2 bedroom (buying is impossible in our area unless you have a huge deposit, plus I’ve lived away from home since 18 so have constantly paid rent with no room to save) my partner has a good paying full time job, I work every evening only for a couple of hours just for some extra money for us.
We wouldn’t be able to rent a 3 bed due to my income being low for part time.

I guess I’m just reaching out to see if anyone has been in the same boat as me. Is it selfish when we haven’t got the biggest of space and only 2 bedrooms? I know it isn’t the end of the world for kids to share. I just don’t want to set myself up to fail if that makes sense.

I also told my MIL as we are close and wanted to let someone know as well as my partner but her response was “you can’t drink on holiday now” which is next week as if that’s my biggest concern? (It’s not, I actually loved being pregnant and feeling fresh everyday with no hangovers!) but I guess the response has made me feel deflated, she didn’t even say congratulations or anything like that.

sorry if I'm rambling, it’s just hard when you can’t speak to anyone else!!

Congratulations on your pregnancy ❤️

Fwiw my brother and his partner lived in a 2 bed flat when their eldest was born, and they stayed there until their 3rd child was 6 months old. It's a squeeze but it's manageable and they were very happy there but ultimately decided to move so they could have a garden.

Thank you! We live in a maisonette so we’re lucky to have a garden which is a life saver in the summer!

If your income is that low and you are renting, have you checked if you can claim UC? And can you pick up some more hours while pregnant now that DC can get funding for nursery?

Yeah I get some help, not massive but definitely helps! I’m not sure if we tried to move if a landlord would be funny about my income plus benefits. On paper we could afford a 3 bedroom plus extra money for bills etc.

Funnily enough I went to a nursery visit today and he’s starting next January (waitlist). My plan was to do my same job in the evening but also do more hours during the days he’s at nursery, I just do cleaning at the moment as it was the easiest thing to find for my hours.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

My DH and I lived in a 1 bed flat with 1 baby until she was 14 months old.

My niece lives in a 2 bed flat with 3 children age 7,5 and 3 and they get on great. Don’t worry about the size of your accommodation. Stop worrying and enjoy your pregnancy.

Your MIL was very rude not to congratulate you and to only comment about not being able to have an alcoholic drink!