Aibu or too sensitive. Alone in the world

[lonelyladyl]

I’ve got 4 children. Great Co parenting situation. But it’s all about the kids of course
I’m estranged from all my family due to toxic childhood which lead into adulthood. It was quite abusive which u won’t dwell into.
I have a nearly 90 year old Nan who adores me and I adore her but I don’t go to her for support as she’s old and I’d never want to upset her.

I talk to kids friends mums etc but they are not friends if that makes sense.
I feel so incredibly alone. I have no adults at all to speak to. To go for a coffee with. Someone to ring. Absolutely nothing and lately I’ve been crying a lot when I’m away from the kids. I feel so alone and isolated in the world.
what would you do in my situation?
my children are ages 18 months to 16 years so big age gaps etc and I don’t have much freedom. I don’t have babysitters or anything the kids come with my everywhere and that’s ok. But just stating I don’t have the opartunity for groups or me time to be less lonely.
i adore the kids and we’re close but i can’t talk to them about my deep sadness etc because it’s not their place to support me.
I’m so sad I see other people with their mums etc and I wish I had it x

Aw. Im sorry youre feeling this way, being a parent can be very lonely. And its really hard to make friends as an adult too! Best advice i can give is to try out social apps for parents like peanut, but make sure you do put in the effort to chat to people on there as its hard going otherwise! Whereabouts in the country are you if you dont mind saying?

Aw that sounds really rough. I'm sorry. Do you go to any play group type things with your youngest? They can be a source of friends especially if you go regularly to one and let yourself be a bit more open with people than you might usually be?