Child maintenance are reducing his payments for travel even though I travel further

[looellen]

My ex lives 3 hours away. Pays child maintenance. He has contacted them to have his payments reduced because he has to travel to see his child. He travels a 3 hour round trip once a month to his sports training then a 6 hour round trip once a month to where I live. We picked a sports event near his home so he would have to do less travel, and I do a 10 hour round trip to the sports training and pay for a hotel overnight. I am fine with this. So I have a very similar amount of travel to him (actually an hour more of driving) yet child maintenance are still reducing his payments because he still has to travel. Is it just me or does this seem unfair? I pay more in travel costs than he does yet he gets his payments to me reduced?

Well CMS doesn’t know you have the same costs do they?

I ma confused.

You both live hours and hours away from this sporting venue? But chose it because close to his home?

They do. I have spoken to them at length about it. They said it doesn't make a difference and they only look at the cost for him to travel.

Yes I thought it would be nice for his dad to be involved in his sport more and for him to have a club he can visit when he stays with his dad rather than being excluded from the sport he loves so much when he stays with his dad for 1-2 weeks each school holiday.

I guess the sports training isn't really relevent. It's the handover driving that matters. If he does all the handover driving then I guess that's what they're considering.

Bloody weird your kid does a sport that is miles away from both of you and he only goes once a month. How the hell does a kid get into a sport like that.

So move the sports training venue.

It’s nuts to be travelling for 5 hours to a sports centre that’s clearly further away than your house than your ex but closer to him.

Forget fighting over who pays what for contact and start looking at what’s practice for you as the RP.

It isn't only once a month. It is solo sport (think mountain biking) where they have regional series races and you have to do them once a month to get a ranking. He has his club near us, and then his club near his dad to he still has a club to go to when he is with his dad rather than having to stop for 2 weeks when he visits him which makes him miserable. The one that is 1.5 hours from his dad is the nearest one to him. He was extremely happy about it and it has made his relationship with his dad a lot better. He did not want to go and see his dad at all when he knew he would have to stop his sport for however many weeks a year.

There are many children who travel a significant distance each month when they are involved in competitive sports. It isn't that abnormal.

Who moved when you split up?

You chose a sporting venue involving a 3 hour round trip from ex
and a 10 hour round trip from you

he see his son EOW?

Yes I've already explained this. We have done what is best for our child with discussions between all 3 of us. My question isn't about the logistics of this, it is about the way child maintenance is calculated and whether it sounds fair based on the amount of travel we both do.

Who moved away? If you moved away then you have created the travel situation. If he did then I would argue the point.

Yes, this.

The sports venue is totally irrelevant to anything.

This.

if you moved, that is why the travel costs are on you.

Irrelevant
CMS have said it is fair. And they know a darn sight more than us about the financials involved in this situation

He moved a long distance, back to his parents then bought a house near them. I moved back near my parents 30 mins from where we lived before we split so I didnt go far at all.

Yes i am aware of that - My DS has competed for GBR in his sport. We often travel Loooonnnggg distances for flights, national/British comps or for
him to attend training camps.
But I wouldn’t be travelling a 10 hour round trip once a month to a facility if there was one closer he could attend. And if I made that choice I would expect to absorb the costs myself if there was an alternative option.

However his training centre where he trains twice a day is 20-30 mins away depending on if it’s 4.30am or pm!

Child maintenance do not care that he moved away. I have argued this point with them, as well as the fact that I travel a further distance. As I said I don't care about the travel as such as it means our son now has a club and friends not too far from his dad where he can feel part of something, and it has been a godsend, but I am pissed off that his dad had called CMS and asked for travel costs to be taken off and they have agreed to this. They called me to confirm everything before they reduced his payments and they said the fact that I travel, the fact that he moved are not what they are looking at, they literally just look at the cost for him of contact.

So you’re asking is CMS policy fair

Cant answer because they know much more about yours and your partner’s financial situation than we do

just don’t now spite him by finding a different venue

Did your child have a parent who lived hours away though, which meant they felt miserable snd depressed when they couldn't do their sport because they didn't have a club near him? 3 weeks off last summer holidays resulted in him withdrawing and the time spent with his dad being extremely strained. I am trying to do what is best for my child, he already knew a lot of the kids from this club as they all meet at national events and he is a happier child because of it.

I would never do that. My son has a solid group of friends there. It is one if the reasons why we chose it.

Child maintenance really dont know that much about us. They know how much he earns, how much I earn, and how far he travels for contact, how much this costs, and that is it. My ex has obviously told them whatever he has told them, and I gave the arguments I gave on here. They dont usually have in depth conversations with most people, it is only because my ex has applied for travel cost reductions that they even had contact with us.

I'm slightly confused. Why are you driving to the sports complex? Do you have a court order that states you need to drive also? I certainly wouldn't be driving 10hrs plus an overnight stay to facilitate Dads access.

Are his salary/bonus details up to date? If not I'd be asking for an income reassessment, if you are certain they have increased.

Because he needs to be there on the Saturday by 11 and his dad finishes work late on the Friday so the only way is by us coming up on the Friday after school.

How old is your son?

I’d stop travelling for the sport. Your ex can collect him and take him there on his weekends if they both want that.