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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

People who believe in ghosts

179 replies

Sheandhercat · 29/07/2026 09:27

MIL came back from a trip to Edinburgh and told us of a “really spooky” thing that happened that MUST have been a ghost because there’s no other explanation. She was walking in a field, no other people around, and she got a whiff of strong rose perfume. That’s it. She said that plus another occasion where her cat was looking at something on the wall when there wasn’t anything there have her convinced that ghosts are real.

I try not to engage in these conversations with my opinion really because people can believe in whatever they want to and it’s pointless getting into a debate about it, because if someone’s already made up their mind it’s hard to convince them otherwise. But she asked me if I’d ever had anything happen and I said no I don’t believe in ghosts. This lead to a conversation where she just kept saying “well go on then, give me one possible explanation for the perfume if it’s not a ghost!” And I was giving explanations that she just wouldn’t accept. How does someone think it’s impossible that someone was around wearing perfume and the wind was just wafting the smell over, but it’s perfectly plausible and OBVIOUS that perfume has transcended into the afterlife and a ghost is the only possible option?!

even if there was no possible explanation I could think of, I still wouldn’t jump to “it must be a ghost” I’d just accept that I don’t know the answer. I don’t understand why it HAS to be a ghost when it just makes no sense. I’m just curious, how many people actually believe in ghosts and why?

OP posts:
MrsShawnHatosy · 29/07/2026 09:31

Wild roses are in bloom now.

I don’t believe in ghosts.

MistressoftheDarkSide · 29/07/2026 09:35

I honestly think there's no point in having this debate.

I've experienced weird things without explanation, and think there's plenty about our reality we don't yet understand but might have explanations for one day.

Unfortunately die hard sceptics often want to label people as unintelligent or mentally unstable above all else, and aren't really open to discussion, just "gently" correcting people to their own view point. And often never the twain shall meet.

Doowoddy · 29/07/2026 09:38

People are nutty. I've never understood how a minor mystery can 'only' be explained by something so utterly farfetched as a ghost. Ignoring all the tricks our brains play, tiredness, the fact that roses genuinely exist in the real world and if you're not a super-smeller there are probably many flowers and chemicals that smell like roses...

ETA I do believe many people are essentially pretending to believe in ghosts, like a kind of suspended disbelief in real life which I think is fun, makes the world more interesting, but there's a limit to that.

Loulou4022 · 29/07/2026 09:42

I’ve had 2 strange experiences that I can’t explain away.

1 I was on my way to see my cousin/ bestie and my car wouldn’t restart at the services rac comes out and it’s the starter motor chap says highly unlikely I can fix it at the roadside you probably need a new one but I’ll give it a go. He tinkers around and no joy tinkers a bit more still no joy. Then this is where it gets weird I start smelling cigar smoke and lo and behold he turns the key and the car roars into life! Now my uncle (her dad) who passed 5 years before smoked cigars and when I looked round the car park there was literally no one else around as I was parked at the back!! She was also in a really bad way when I got up there with work, kids and husband stress so it would have been awful if I hadn’t been able to get up to her!

The second was at the back to backs in Birmingham. I’d been absolutely fine all the way round then entered one room and came over very sick feeling and hot! As soon as I left the room I was fine again!! I mentioned it to my friend when I next saw her and she said she hadn’t wanted to mention it beforehand it case it put me off but she’d had the same experience in that same room! She’d told the guide and they’d said lots of people get the same! They’re sure there is something strange in that room as ornaments on the mantlepiece get moved overnight! No one has been in the room overnight!

BirdLandedonmyHead · 29/07/2026 09:47

I sort of believe in ghosts. But more as energy imprints rather than individual spectres wandering around wafting perfume.

My belief is that severely traumatic events can leave an impression on an area which are brains rearrange into visions etc. Which is why ghost sightings are usually linked to hospitals, battlefields, old army barracks etc.

ETA... I also believe science hasnt explained everything yet.

Gardenisablooming · 29/07/2026 09:49

Too many incidents to list but wouldn't class myself as a willing believer!

ginasevern · 29/07/2026 09:51

Well I do believe in the metaphysical and I feel that there are things we don't understand. Call it energy or inter-dimensionality if you like. But your MIL's examples are daft. I wouldn't have a massive debate about it though. She isn't (presumably) hurting anyone and she's perfectly entitled to her thoughts.

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 29/07/2026 10:52

I don't believe in ghosts. I'm an atheist, I believe when you're dead you're dead, there's nothing after it. Ghosts aren't real.

I've also experienced two hauntings in my life.

I spent three months being "watched" by something in my home. I'd catch sight of a figure out of the corner of my eye, usually jump out of my fucking skin, and when I turned to look at it, nothing was there. It'd happen while me and DP were watching TV, or it'd be standing at the bottom of the stairs as I came down, or in a doorway as I walked past. Usually about once a day for those 3 months.

During that time I also saw DP standing at an upstairs window as I approached the house, but she was sat on the sofa when I got in. She couldn't have got downstairs in that time, I could see the stairs through the frosted glass in the front door.

Something also spent a fun evening lobbing a teaspoon around my kitchen. I'm upstairs, hear something fall, come downstairs and it's on the floor. Pick it up, put it on the side. Start walking back upstairs and hear it again. Come back and it's on the opposite counter to the one I put it on. So I take it upstairs with me, put it on my computer desk and carry on gaming. About half an hour later, I hear the noise again. The spoon isn't on my desk, it's on the kitchen floor again. I'd been home alone all this time.

All of the above screams ghost right? Probably not. I was going through the most stressful period of my life at the time. My Mum was dying, DP and I were going through a rough patch, and redundancies were looming at work. Given a choice between ghost or me losing my marbles? I'm going for the second one.

The second one was actually a few years earlier, but is harder to explain. While I was a student I worked at my universities library. We used to shut at 10 in those days, and anyone working at closing had to wander round the buildings and kick out anyone still there. (I swear some students actually wanted to be locked in!) The law library was connected to the main library, but was a much older building. For reasons I'll explain that will become clear, no-one ever wanted to be the one down there at that time of night. As I was often the only able-bodied male working, I tended to end up drawing the short straw.

You'd hear things down there. Footsteps, people talking. Never loud enough to actually make out words, but definitely hushed conversation. You'd assume there were students in there so you'd wander round looking for them. Never anyone in there (noone liked being in there at that time of night, not even the students). I used to feel like someone was playing a trick on me. You'd hear stuff from one direction, head that way and it'd come from somewhere else entirely. I figured it was sound travelling through the vents or something, and then gradually got more annoyed with people, assumed another staff member was playing silly buggers when all I wanted to do was go home.

So one of the porters (basically security, although they all seemed about 80 years old. I've forgotten his name, so we'll call him Clive), said he'd lock us in one night, and we'd see if it happened while no-one was around. So 10 o'clock rolls around, and we set up shop down there. There'd been no weirdness at closing time that night, and there wasn't as we sat in the dark, reading our books and chatting quietly. 11 o'clock rolls around, then 12. Nothing. I'm mentally thinking I'm vindicated, that it has been someone pissing about, that I'm going to throw a proper strop at whoevers responsible. Thats when I hear a very clear "Why are you still here?" Young womans voice, close by. I assume I'd drifted off to sleep. But Clives looking at me with wild eyes. We both get up, and start walking the aisles. We don't hear anything so clear again, but we do get the usual. Footsteps, conversation. Half an hour goes by and we find nothing. So we head home, locking up as we go. If there is anyone still there then they're either getting stuck for the night or will have to get out through a fire escape.

Clives back the next morning to open up. I'm not, I'm a student, I don't get up before 8am for anyone. Noones in there when he opens the library.

I find that one much harder to explain away. It wasn't just me who experienced it, others did too. I work in the uni again now, although in a different building. I asked when I went to get my ID card from the library whether people still experience it. The library is open 24 hours these days, so no-one needs to venture into the law library late at night. People do still hear stuff down there though.

Still don't believe it's a ghost though.

ilovemykindle · 29/07/2026 11:01

I think I'm a logical person don't believe in ghosts or anything spooky.
We went on a trip to Beaumaris jail. DH hated it from the beginning and he ended up sitting on a bench outside.
I looked around and as soon as I went into the punishment room and for some reason I started to sob very loudly.
Came out and stopped straight away. Looked around a bit more before going back to this room again I was sobbing and it started at the door. So never actually saw the room beyond the door.
I spoke to the tour guide and he said that a few people start sobbing at the door.

Screamingabdabz · 29/07/2026 11:06

I’d love to believe ghosts were real but I’m like you op, if someone can’t possibly accept that a breeze ruffling their hair is most likely just a breeze rather than grandma’s disembodied spirit there is nothing to talk about, they’re just an idiot.

JabbaTheBeachHut · 29/07/2026 11:09

Oh I hate it when people try to push their belief in ghosts onto others with the "Go on then, explain why that happened?"

The truth is you could smack them round the head with the solid facts of why it happened, but they want to believe what they believe.

I work at an attraction, in a 15th century building and you wouldn't believe some of the nonsense the visitors want to believe.

ETA: And they always begin with "I'm the least woo person you'll ever meet but..."

Yeah, of course you are Barbara...of course you are 🤣

squirrelchops2 · 29/07/2026 11:13

BirdLandedonmyHead · 29/07/2026 09:47

I sort of believe in ghosts. But more as energy imprints rather than individual spectres wandering around wafting perfume.

My belief is that severely traumatic events can leave an impression on an area which are brains rearrange into visions etc. Which is why ghost sightings are usually linked to hospitals, battlefields, old army barracks etc.

ETA... I also believe science hasnt explained everything yet.

Edited

I'm with you on this.

squirrelchops2 · 29/07/2026 11:14

Millions of people believe in a 'god'. I've never had an experience that leads me to belive they exist
I believe in ghosts more than a 'god' as I've had experiences that lead me to believe in ghosts.

Rhaidimiddim · 29/07/2026 11:17

Sheandhercat · 29/07/2026 09:27

MIL came back from a trip to Edinburgh and told us of a “really spooky” thing that happened that MUST have been a ghost because there’s no other explanation. She was walking in a field, no other people around, and she got a whiff of strong rose perfume. That’s it. She said that plus another occasion where her cat was looking at something on the wall when there wasn’t anything there have her convinced that ghosts are real.

I try not to engage in these conversations with my opinion really because people can believe in whatever they want to and it’s pointless getting into a debate about it, because if someone’s already made up their mind it’s hard to convince them otherwise. But she asked me if I’d ever had anything happen and I said no I don’t believe in ghosts. This lead to a conversation where she just kept saying “well go on then, give me one possible explanation for the perfume if it’s not a ghost!” And I was giving explanations that she just wouldn’t accept. How does someone think it’s impossible that someone was around wearing perfume and the wind was just wafting the smell over, but it’s perfectly plausible and OBVIOUS that perfume has transcended into the afterlife and a ghost is the only possible option?!

even if there was no possible explanation I could think of, I still wouldn’t jump to “it must be a ghost” I’d just accept that I don’t know the answer. I don’t understand why it HAS to be a ghost when it just makes no sense. I’m just curious, how many people actually believe in ghosts and why?

I do, because of things that I have seen and experienced that cannot be debunked. And, believe me, I have tried to debunk them.

ShodAndShadySenators · 29/07/2026 11:23

Your MIL's examples are just daft though. Many people have experienced something they can't logically explain, hers are very easily explained with "roses exist outside, often in field hedges" and "cats are nutters".

I've had my cat sitting on my knee staring at the wall behind me, tracking something with her eyes. It's most likely a tiny fly that I haven't noticed. It's kinda creepy but not indisputable evidence of other worldiness. She's like Fox Mulder, "I WANT to believe"... Lots of people don't seem to want to look for alternative reasons, where others will try to find rational explanations that aren't "Ghosts innit".

See also: white feathers wafting around, random appearance of robins and rainbows, popular songs coming on the radio.

StormGazing · 29/07/2026 11:26

Whilst I don’t believe in ghosts as such, I think it’s very shortsighted to think we have the capability to see everything, and I don’t think that everything we
encounter is all there is - the universe is far more complex that we can even imagine

MsIceSandwich · 29/07/2026 11:29

All cats stare at things that aren't there, it's hardly proof of the supernatural.

Middleagedspreadisreal · 29/07/2026 11:29

I've seen one so am a believer now!

LettiSpaghetti · 29/07/2026 11:34

Middleagedspreadisreal · 29/07/2026 11:29

I've seen one so am a believer now!

Was it when you saw her face?

Loopylalalou · 29/07/2026 11:37

BirdLandedonmyHead · 29/07/2026 09:47

I sort of believe in ghosts. But more as energy imprints rather than individual spectres wandering around wafting perfume.

My belief is that severely traumatic events can leave an impression on an area which are brains rearrange into visions etc. Which is why ghost sightings are usually linked to hospitals, battlefields, old army barracks etc.

ETA... I also believe science hasnt explained everything yet.

Edited

Agree. I also believe objects such as furniture can hold that imprint. What people allege to see is their interpretation alone.

MrsShawnHatosy · 29/07/2026 11:50

I spent three months being "watched" by something in my home. I'd catch sight of a figure out of the corner of my eye, usually jump out of my fucking skin, and when I turned to look at it, nothing was there. It'd happen while me and DP were watching TV, or it'd be standing at the bottom of the stairs as I came down, or in a doorway as I walked past. Usually about once a day for those 3 months.

This sounds very like the effects of infrasound to me. Infrasound is sound too low for the human ear to hear, could be caused by something electrical in your home. Although can’t hear it, infrasound can induce feelings of unease and cause micro vibrations of your eyeballs, thus making you think you are seeing shadowy figures out of the corner of your eye.

(I love Dr Kieran O’Keefe!)

JabbaTheBeachHut · 29/07/2026 11:52

LettiSpaghetti · 29/07/2026 11:34

Was it when you saw her face?

This really made me laugh! 🤣🤣🤣

user67392097643 · 29/07/2026 12:08

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 29/07/2026 10:52

I don't believe in ghosts. I'm an atheist, I believe when you're dead you're dead, there's nothing after it. Ghosts aren't real.

I've also experienced two hauntings in my life.

I spent three months being "watched" by something in my home. I'd catch sight of a figure out of the corner of my eye, usually jump out of my fucking skin, and when I turned to look at it, nothing was there. It'd happen while me and DP were watching TV, or it'd be standing at the bottom of the stairs as I came down, or in a doorway as I walked past. Usually about once a day for those 3 months.

During that time I also saw DP standing at an upstairs window as I approached the house, but she was sat on the sofa when I got in. She couldn't have got downstairs in that time, I could see the stairs through the frosted glass in the front door.

Something also spent a fun evening lobbing a teaspoon around my kitchen. I'm upstairs, hear something fall, come downstairs and it's on the floor. Pick it up, put it on the side. Start walking back upstairs and hear it again. Come back and it's on the opposite counter to the one I put it on. So I take it upstairs with me, put it on my computer desk and carry on gaming. About half an hour later, I hear the noise again. The spoon isn't on my desk, it's on the kitchen floor again. I'd been home alone all this time.

All of the above screams ghost right? Probably not. I was going through the most stressful period of my life at the time. My Mum was dying, DP and I were going through a rough patch, and redundancies were looming at work. Given a choice between ghost or me losing my marbles? I'm going for the second one.

The second one was actually a few years earlier, but is harder to explain. While I was a student I worked at my universities library. We used to shut at 10 in those days, and anyone working at closing had to wander round the buildings and kick out anyone still there. (I swear some students actually wanted to be locked in!) The law library was connected to the main library, but was a much older building. For reasons I'll explain that will become clear, no-one ever wanted to be the one down there at that time of night. As I was often the only able-bodied male working, I tended to end up drawing the short straw.

You'd hear things down there. Footsteps, people talking. Never loud enough to actually make out words, but definitely hushed conversation. You'd assume there were students in there so you'd wander round looking for them. Never anyone in there (noone liked being in there at that time of night, not even the students). I used to feel like someone was playing a trick on me. You'd hear stuff from one direction, head that way and it'd come from somewhere else entirely. I figured it was sound travelling through the vents or something, and then gradually got more annoyed with people, assumed another staff member was playing silly buggers when all I wanted to do was go home.

So one of the porters (basically security, although they all seemed about 80 years old. I've forgotten his name, so we'll call him Clive), said he'd lock us in one night, and we'd see if it happened while no-one was around. So 10 o'clock rolls around, and we set up shop down there. There'd been no weirdness at closing time that night, and there wasn't as we sat in the dark, reading our books and chatting quietly. 11 o'clock rolls around, then 12. Nothing. I'm mentally thinking I'm vindicated, that it has been someone pissing about, that I'm going to throw a proper strop at whoevers responsible. Thats when I hear a very clear "Why are you still here?" Young womans voice, close by. I assume I'd drifted off to sleep. But Clives looking at me with wild eyes. We both get up, and start walking the aisles. We don't hear anything so clear again, but we do get the usual. Footsteps, conversation. Half an hour goes by and we find nothing. So we head home, locking up as we go. If there is anyone still there then they're either getting stuck for the night or will have to get out through a fire escape.

Clives back the next morning to open up. I'm not, I'm a student, I don't get up before 8am for anyone. Noones in there when he opens the library.

I find that one much harder to explain away. It wasn't just me who experienced it, others did too. I work in the uni again now, although in a different building. I asked when I went to get my ID card from the library whether people still experience it. The library is open 24 hours these days, so no-one needs to venture into the law library late at night. People do still hear stuff down there though.

Still don't believe it's a ghost though.

No idea about your spoons! But sound is an odd one - a local pub has made a big room into a restaurant. Ceilings are high, it’s a long/thin-ish space. You really struggle to hear what the people you are sat with are saying, but you can hear perfectly what the group at the other end of the room are saying - its a fun night out for a nosey person😂

Middleagedspreadisreal · 29/07/2026 12:30

LettiSpaghetti · 29/07/2026 11:34

Was it when you saw her face?

Whose face?

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 29/07/2026 12:47

MrsShawnHatosy · 29/07/2026 11:50

I spent three months being "watched" by something in my home. I'd catch sight of a figure out of the corner of my eye, usually jump out of my fucking skin, and when I turned to look at it, nothing was there. It'd happen while me and DP were watching TV, or it'd be standing at the bottom of the stairs as I came down, or in a doorway as I walked past. Usually about once a day for those 3 months.

This sounds very like the effects of infrasound to me. Infrasound is sound too low for the human ear to hear, could be caused by something electrical in your home. Although can’t hear it, infrasound can induce feelings of unease and cause micro vibrations of your eyeballs, thus making you think you are seeing shadowy figures out of the corner of your eye.

(I love Dr Kieran O’Keefe!)

Edited

Haha, so do I!

Although I do feel like he seems to be turning a bit to the "Woo" side in some of the recent episodes of Uncanny! He seems to be actively pointing out stuff he can't think of explanations for