I agree this is important.
My DP suffers with anxiety and tbh it can be really hard at times to remain supportive and understanding when it overtakes everything. I sometimes felt I was being lost and had no voice in the relationship, almost like he was taking up all the space and his were the only needs that mattered. I wasn’t getting any of the things one needs from a relationship, I ended up feeling like a cross between his mum and his therapist.
We took a break, remaining friends, he tried some new medication, found other avenues for support and we’ve since got back together. We’re getting on so much better now that he doesn’t lean quite so heavily on me and he’s able to be an equal and supportive partner.
He was really hurt and said it was his worst fear that he was a burden to those he loved, but he also understood that it’s hard for me, as he’s been on the other side of the situation with an ex and knows the toll it can take on a partner when you’re deep in depression or anxiety.
Obviously without knowing the exact impact it has I can’t say for sure, but if you’re anything like my DP, it’s not fair to treat your partner as being unreasonable for wanting his relationship to bring him some joy and happiness, and not to just be a one sided thing where he has to commit to a lifetime of essentially being a carer. Be honest with yourself about how this relationship benefits each of you, and whether he’s really unreasonable for wanting to give it some more time before agreeing that this is his life forever.
That’s not to say I don’t have huge sympathy for you dealing with this but I don’t think the flippant posts saying to get some self respect and dump him are really seeing the bigger picture.