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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to wonder why a pensioner struggling financially would not use housing equity?

559 replies

Powerbungalow · 22/07/2026 10:29

I'm not being unsympathetic

Theres a lady on the news at the moment, saying how times are tough and shes only cooking one meal a week - imagine she's eating cold food.

One thing that stood out though "I own my own house and it costs in maintenance" Depending on where she is, would you not get a life time mortgage or sell and rent? She has a big asset, why not use it to have a better life? I know I would.

She may be holding on to it for inheritance, but she didn't say - if so, then can her family help. It just seems totally crazy

OP posts:
Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 16:12

StealMySunshining · 23/07/2026 16:19

Lie about what? Am I in court?

Me.

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 16:16

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 23/07/2026 16:22

People name change for privacy reasons - I don’t think it is fair to assume @StealMySunshining is doing it for any malign motivation.

Well she is as she has lied about me and there’s no context as she’s name changed so I can’t refute her claims of me moaning about what I ‘get’ when I “get” sfa as I live on my private pension that I paid into for 43 years.

If she stopped name changing I could see the context and refute it.

Cowardly imo.

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 16:20

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 16:16

Well she is as she has lied about me and there’s no context as she’s name changed so I can’t refute her claims of me moaning about what I ‘get’ when I “get” sfa as I live on my private pension that I paid into for 43 years.

If she stopped name changing I could see the context and refute it.

Cowardly imo.

Just admit you’re in love with me.

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 16:24

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 16:20

Just admit you’re in love with me.

I think you’re not very well if that counts?

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 16:35

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 16:24

I think you’re not very well if that counts?

Then maybe stop quoting me?

GasPanic · 24/07/2026 16:45

Katypp · 24/07/2026 12:50

I imagine the calls for older people to release the equity in their homes is - as is usual with threads like this one - driven by envy and spite.
For some reason which I cannot fathom, people at the beginning/middle of their mortgages seem to think they are somehow disadvantaged because they haven't acquired the equity people much further down the line have.
It shouldn't come as any surprise to anyone that a house bought two years ago that it has not increased in value at the same rate as a house bought 50 years ago, but it seems to be driving ridiculous bad feeling towards pensioners.
To all those griping about the value of pensioners' houses: If you are paying off a mortgage now, the overwhelming likelihood is that your house will increase in value over your lifetime.
The years of raising children are the most expensive years of your life - there is nothing unique about struggling as a young family, and before another urban myth is trotted out, it has not been commonplace to have just one breadwinner in a family for decade now.
The truth is, every generation has its struggles. Young families now are finding housing difficult. My generation found it easier to buy a house, but struggled with very high interest rates and negative equity.
Stop being so entitled and accept the old person living in a house worth much more than they paid for it WILL be you one day. I only hope that your children are kinder to you.

"I imagine the calls for older people to release the equity in their homes is - as is usual with threads like this one - driven by envy and spite."

Or alternatively driven by the fact that the people making those calls believe the country is maxed out in terms of taxation of working class people, services are poor, we need to spend more money on things like defence and there just isn't the cash around to allow some people to sit on millions of pounds worth of assets while getting further state support.

"Stop being so entitled and accept the old person living in a house worth much more than they paid for it WILL be you one day."

I am yet to be convinced that most people today will see the gains in property that occurred in the SE during say 1995-2005. An example include the changes in the London flat market which will feed into housing at some point. My place has barely risen in inflation over the past decade.

Unless you see scope for people getting considerably richer with more money to spend on housing (how is that going to happen?) then it is unlikely that house prices will rise significantly, unless we are going to allow a whole load of money to pile into the country from outside to chase up prices ?

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 17:03

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 16:35

Then maybe stop quoting me?

Well no as you blatantly lied about me.

Katypp · 24/07/2026 17:15

GasPanic · 24/07/2026 16:45

"I imagine the calls for older people to release the equity in their homes is - as is usual with threads like this one - driven by envy and spite."

Or alternatively driven by the fact that the people making those calls believe the country is maxed out in terms of taxation of working class people, services are poor, we need to spend more money on things like defence and there just isn't the cash around to allow some people to sit on millions of pounds worth of assets while getting further state support.

"Stop being so entitled and accept the old person living in a house worth much more than they paid for it WILL be you one day."

I am yet to be convinced that most people today will see the gains in property that occurred in the SE during say 1995-2005. An example include the changes in the London flat market which will feed into housing at some point. My place has barely risen in inflation over the past decade.

Unless you see scope for people getting considerably richer with more money to spend on housing (how is that going to happen?) then it is unlikely that house prices will rise significantly, unless we are going to allow a whole load of money to pile into the country from outside to chase up prices ?

House price growth isn't measured in just 10 years but over the course of, say, 40 years, it is pretty much unheard of for house prices not to rise substantially.
If you want to cherry pick a decade, I'll give you 1988-98, when interest rates rose steeply and house prices slumped into negative equity in some cases.
Prices recovered then and they will in the future.

Powerbungalow · 24/07/2026 17:21

Pistachiocake · 23/07/2026 15:02

No, why should she give away what she wants to help her family? If they've all worked hard and paid enough tax, while others spent their money on something else, she should have the right to give it to them.
We're a strange society: we don't insist richer people use private healthcare/education, and we don't mind if people spend their wages on luxury, but insist older people with money pay for their own care homes.

If she is choosing between heating, eating or leaving money to her family then that's completely stupid

OP posts:
Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 17:22

Powerbungalow · 24/07/2026 17:21

If she is choosing between heating, eating or leaving money to her family then that's completely stupid

Can you post three examples of people doing this?

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 17:30

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 17:03

Well no as you blatantly lied about me.

Oh my god what are you talking about? This is an anonymous, online forum. Get a grip. Stop quoting nonsense at me and stop stalking me across Mumsnet, it’s pathetic.

panfrydish · 24/07/2026 17:31

Katypp · 24/07/2026 17:15

House price growth isn't measured in just 10 years but over the course of, say, 40 years, it is pretty much unheard of for house prices not to rise substantially.
If you want to cherry pick a decade, I'll give you 1988-98, when interest rates rose steeply and house prices slumped into negative equity in some cases.
Prices recovered then and they will in the future.

But if you look over the last 40 years you will see a very different pattern. The 80s was responsible for huge growth for example particularly in London.

We aren’t going to see that huge growth again because of a number of different factors eg demographics, lending criteria, wage stagnation, affordability etc

panfrydish · 24/07/2026 17:33

Katypp · 24/07/2026 12:50

I imagine the calls for older people to release the equity in their homes is - as is usual with threads like this one - driven by envy and spite.
For some reason which I cannot fathom, people at the beginning/middle of their mortgages seem to think they are somehow disadvantaged because they haven't acquired the equity people much further down the line have.
It shouldn't come as any surprise to anyone that a house bought two years ago that it has not increased in value at the same rate as a house bought 50 years ago, but it seems to be driving ridiculous bad feeling towards pensioners.
To all those griping about the value of pensioners' houses: If you are paying off a mortgage now, the overwhelming likelihood is that your house will increase in value over your lifetime.
The years of raising children are the most expensive years of your life - there is nothing unique about struggling as a young family, and before another urban myth is trotted out, it has not been commonplace to have just one breadwinner in a family for decade now.
The truth is, every generation has its struggles. Young families now are finding housing difficult. My generation found it easier to buy a house, but struggled with very high interest rates and negative equity.
Stop being so entitled and accept the old person living in a house worth much more than they paid for it WILL be you one day. I only hope that your children are kinder to you.

lol, I don’t even know what to say to this nonsense and I’m not even young.

Katypp · 24/07/2026 17:35

panfrydish · 24/07/2026 17:31

But if you look over the last 40 years you will see a very different pattern. The 80s was responsible for huge growth for example particularly in London.

We aren’t going to see that huge growth again because of a number of different factors eg demographics, lending criteria, wage stagnation, affordability etc

But you don't know that any more than I do.
Posters on here are very keen on hyperbole to prove their point - no house growth, no pensions, working until you drop - when the fact is no one knows how things will pan out.
If someone had told me when I was 30 I would be living in a house worth £350,000 I would probably have reacted the same.

Katypp · 24/07/2026 17:35

panfrydish · 24/07/2026 17:33

lol, I don’t even know what to say to this nonsense and I’m not even young.

Why is it nonsense? I'm interested.

Powerbungalow · 24/07/2026 17:37

StealMySunshining · 23/07/2026 16:42

That still doesn’t answer my question.

What is the difference between an 18 year old working 16 hours a week and a parent working 16 hours a week? Both are work. Both are liable for the same rate of NI and taxes. Both will pay in to the system at the same rate. So what’s the difference? Is one more valuable or important than the other? Because I can’t see it.

Surely the single parent has a harder time than the student? Because of all the other stuff they need to deal with

OP posts:
panfrydish · 24/07/2026 17:38

Stats I have provided earlier on in this thread from the DWP shows that of the 1937-1946 cohort of people in the UK, only 36% of them were in FT work for more than 75% of the time. So who are all these people working from dusk til dawn from the age of 15-65?

Quite

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 17:38

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 17:30

Oh my god what are you talking about? This is an anonymous, online forum. Get a grip. Stop quoting nonsense at me and stop stalking me across Mumsnet, it’s pathetic.

Across mumsnet? One thread. Is lying a habit?

Powerbungalow · 24/07/2026 17:41

FaceIt · 23/07/2026 19:27

YABVU

After all the blood sweat and tears to have a beautiful and warm comfortable home, I would rather starve than be ripped off by an equity release company or sell up and pay ridiculous amounts in rent.

Do you actually know anyone that’s done it? Because I do, and it was definitely not a happy way out for them.

So they can starve and freeze in their beautiful house that is run down because they can't afford to maintain it

Cool

OP posts:
StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 17:43

Differentforgirls · 24/07/2026 17:38

Across mumsnet? One thread. Is lying a habit?

Did you not search for me to see if I was a new poster or not? And from that you have concocted this wild narrative that I am somehow on a mission to destroy you. Again, get a grip. I don’t care about you. I am contributing to a discussion about pension policy.

GasPanic · 24/07/2026 17:44

Katypp · 24/07/2026 17:15

House price growth isn't measured in just 10 years but over the course of, say, 40 years, it is pretty much unheard of for house prices not to rise substantially.
If you want to cherry pick a decade, I'll give you 1988-98, when interest rates rose steeply and house prices slumped into negative equity in some cases.
Prices recovered then and they will in the future.

My house was bought for x in 2005. To keep place with inflation it should be worth about 1.8x now.

It's actually worth about 1.5x. So it hasn't even kept up with inflation over the 20 year time period. What it will do over the next 20 years or so I don't know, but I doubt it will "rise substantially".

There are flats around my area that are struggling to keep up with their 2005 purchase price.

It's only certain types of houses and certain parts of the country where prices have risen by large amounts.

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 17:45

panfrydish · 24/07/2026 17:38

Stats I have provided earlier on in this thread from the DWP shows that of the 1937-1946 cohort of people in the UK, only 36% of them were in FT work for more than 75% of the time. So who are all these people working from dusk til dawn from the age of 15-65?

Quite

None of the posters who are up in arms have said anything about those statistics yet. But I guess the DWP is also out to get the poor pensioners. I knew the figure was lower than people would think but even I was surprised by how low it actually is! Only 36%!

Powerbungalow · 24/07/2026 17:45

PullingOutHair123 · 24/07/2026 08:14

Of course it’s compounding. Giving it a name doesn’t make it ethical. It just gives the family a spiralling debt.

It's not a debt in the way a family would need to pay back, they wouldn't be inheriting the house

OP posts:
panfrydish · 24/07/2026 17:46

Katypp · 24/07/2026 17:35

But you don't know that any more than I do.
Posters on here are very keen on hyperbole to prove their point - no house growth, no pensions, working until you drop - when the fact is no one knows how things will pan out.
If someone had told me when I was 30 I would be living in a house worth £350,000 I would probably have reacted the same.

You have confused me, we don’t know what?

The changing demographics? We know we have an ageing population, there are more over 60s than over 20s now.

We know that lending criteria has changed, you can’t get 95% interest only mortgages, you can’t self certify without any proof.

We know that wages have stagnated and economic growth has eluded us for nearly 20 years.

Affordability is a factor because interest rates of 5/6% with today’s actual prices have the same squeeze on incomes like the higher interest rates of the past.

Of course a house you buy today should be worth more in 10 years, due to inflation but decades ago we had huge above inflationary gains and today many properties aren’t even keeping pace with inflation.

What do you think is going to drive huge property price growth like we saw in the 80s and 90s?

StealMySunshining · 24/07/2026 17:48

Powerbungalow · 24/07/2026 17:37

Surely the single parent has a harder time than the student? Because of all the other stuff they need to deal with

But you see I don’t think that’s relevant. Both individuals are working the same number of hours and contributing the same NI and taxes. Why should their individual circumstances matter? Because if we are saying that they do, then we start making moral judgements about who “deserves” more or who has worked “harder”, which is where the current cohort of pensioners fall down.

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