AIBU to find references to 'a hobby' on Mumsnet odd?

[Jane143]

Why is it whenever a hobby is mentioned it’s always referred to as ‘a hobby’
why the secrecy or it a Mumsnet rule?
am I being unreasonable to find it a bit odd?

But we would all be in bewildered awe and probably select you as Mn Chief Poster. That's got to more than make up for everyone knowing who you are and immediately going to ferret around your social media to check the good looks of your spouse, the size of your conservatory and whether you have Room for A Pony? Right?

But if she availed herself of the infinite possibility of namechanging available on Mn, you might still have recognised her on the paddle-boarding post, but not been able to follow her along to the child witticism or the workplace gossip.

Though anyone who includes anything identifying in their username is probably not the sharpest.

If you Advance Searched Me now, you'd probably find out that I have one child whom I had at 40, after planning to be childfree my entire life. But because I NC today or yesterday, you won't also know that I wrote a book on unusual phobias/once entered an order of enclosed nuns/lost an arm in my teens, or anything else that would identify someone.

Between stamp collecting, bird watching and my dildo collection, I just never know which one to mention.

There are 24 of you, huh?

Interesting. Very interesting.

Is this because of the MN theory that there are only about ten actual posters but we just name change a lot?

I think it can be outing when combined with other info. Often other info is crucial, but what the hobby is isn't so that gets left out for privacy purposes.

I never understand why people are so desperate to know what the hobby is, most often it just doesn't matter.

It’s almost always cycling. Totally outing-there are so few MAMILs

It’s just not a term anyone uses in real life conversation ! Who talks about hobbies, using the term hobby.

As PPs have said, they think it will be 'outing' even when it's something incredibly normal that millions of people do.

I also think some people do know that the responses will be skewed if they say what the hobby is. For example, someone who says 'AIBU to think my husband shoudn't spend two evenings a week gaming / playing football / playing in a pub darts league' will absolutely get a different response on Mumsnet from someone who says 'AIBU to think my husband shouldn't spend two nights a week practising with his string quartet or taking a watercolour painting class'. There's always a more negative response the hobby is one that Mumsnet has deemed laddish or a bit common.

I'm always amused at how many Mumsnetters have dilemmas relating to a teen who 'competes in a sport at a high level'. I mean, if that sport is tennis or football or athletics, that's impressive and probably quite important to invest time and money into. Not so much if it's, eg, petanque.

Dissing petanque?

Pshhhhh!

Well, if I was to be complaining about DH and his hobby (I haven't done a thread or anything but just as an example) I would say what it was because it's pretty common. I wouldn't specifically mention mine because it's a bit more niche, so someone who knows me might recognise me.

My DH has a hobby that takes him out of the house for hours-
IT'S CYCLING FFS!!!!

The problem when people don't say that it's golf, or metal detecting or archery is that the thread fills up with people saying is it cycling? Is it ballroom dancing? Is it rugby?

Unless you are a regular name changer then being cautious about personal details is very sensible.

My DH’s hobby is indeed cycling, but if I happen to mention my DC’s more unusual hobby, or my own and possibly where in the country we live it becomes easier for my two good friends (also MNers) to recognise me, especially with a quick advanced search.

It’s not any single piece of info that outs you, it’s the combination.

Everyone should namechange regularly. Limits the exposure.

That ‘think’ does my head in.

I’ve noticed that it’s used about all sorts of twaddle, not just hobbies.

‘I work with children, think, private nursery’.

As if any of that is beyond our wit.

But added to everything else a person has said it could our them especially as some people seem to enjoy trying to play detective and read all a posters past posts to try and catch them out.
I don't see why it matters if some posters want to keep some information private to protect their identities

😂😂😂

Boules are expensive!

I'm sure it could be outing if I mentioned my fondness for chainsaw juggling while pole-dancing. Oops...

When it's a man's hobby I always assume it's Warhammer.

Cycling, golf, cricket.

men seem skilled in finding hobbies that take up much time / whole days out of the house.

If they compete in their sport at a high level then it is probably the result of years of hard work, dedication and family support.

Regardless of whether you happen to find it impressive, it’s important to them.

And actually loads of kids will compete at high level in football and never go on to become professional players due to the volumes in that sport.

Less well known sports might actually mean thst the child will have a chance of making it their career if they are very good.

I was on a thread recently where I stated that I sing in a church choir - and the OP (sarcastically) responded I'm glad you have a hobby.
I'd never describe singing as 'a hobby' anyway - but I'm now wondering if I had provided too much information and the OP felt I was breaking MN rules by giving too much detail.
Clearly I should have stated that I have a hobby connected with religious buildings and robes 😆

Worried about being identified. If you name the hobby it can derail thread.
So eg your AIBU is related to logistics of getting your child to their hobby and their dad not helping if you say it’s brownies there will posts about scouts being better, a de rail about how brownies used to let boys join, someone saying their brown owl hated them in 1986 etc.

Aren't they just! I wanted to buy a set, after playing at our neighbour's house a few weeks ago, but then had to remind myself our banks are in different post codes 🤣