AIBU to think this is harassment, not just anti-social behaviour?

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Last 2 weekends my house has been attacked by kicking the door egged and now throwing beans including in my garden this weekend it’s escalated and they tried to bash my door down but ran off - I think this is linked to my 14 year old telling a boy she didn’t want to be in a relationship with him
my daughters terrified we had to leave at 2am last night
police want her to give a statement but because they are wearing balaclavas glasses and gloves and hoodies it’s hard to identifie I got cctv tracing them walking to ours ring door bells in my street show them circling our property before attacking it on 2 nights

I feel hopeless about the police getting conviction or that conviction changing anything

please give me suggestions what we can do
it’s just me and my daughter and they know this
they police are saying criminal damage and anti social behaviour I think it’s harassment

Do you know the boys parents? It could be a starting point to figure out if it is him first.

No I don’t

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, It sounds horrendous. Get your DD to give a statement saying who she believes is responsible and hopefully the police can have a word with them. Don’t go near any of them or their parents yourself. That would just cause more trouble.

You’ve said ‘it’s just me and daughter and they know this’. Who are ‘they’? The police are useless imo, you need to gather as much info as you can and keep pushing.

Do you have any male friends or family who could stay over next weekend and be ‘seen’.

I agree, that's harassment

The police are going to work on the assumption that there's no proof that it's linked to that boy

Now is there anyway you can get proof? He could be getting people to act on his behalf though.

So sorry this is happening. I second the suggestion to see if any male friends or family members can stay. Keep reporting to the police - go to your MP too

Highlight it as a potential domestic related stalking. I.e. you have reason to believe the suspect is known to your DD and has a romantic/sexual interest in your DD, and that things have escalated since her rejection.

I would get cameras at every angle of the house, and sprinklers out the front. I would post their pictures all over Facebook local groups, asking if anyone knows who they are.

That’s exactly what he is doing whucg muddies the waters I do have quite a bit of proof im
not sure it’s enough for a charge

It’s just so horrible a house we once loved and felt safe in we feel we can even go back to

I don’t want to scare you, but please can you ring the fire brigade and ask them if they can fit a fire proof letterbox casing behind your letterbox in light of this harassment? If they don’t do them in your area, I think you can also buy them to fit yourself. I’ve heard a couple of times of this sort of thing escalating. I’m sorry you have to put up with this.

yes We aren’t returning until all this is done

Disgusting to put up with such idiots.
Can someone come and stay to support you or a male ?
Bunch morons.
Police should be ashamed

Sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands…..I know I would.

I would raise a complaint with the police & get your local councillor or MP involved. This sounds terrifying for you both.

I agree. That's a woeful response from the police imo.

Maybe try your local police & crime commissioner, too. I don't think a councillor would be able to do anything much, since police authorities were abolished they don't really have much of a role in policing.

This sounds like harassment. It’s more that criminal damage or any social behaviour because it is directly in response to a rejection.
The police should be trained to identify this and her statement could include the circumstances leading up to the incidents.
Insist on more support from the police (and maybe inform the school?) and remind them about reducing Violence Against Women and Girls strategy.
If they do t help you maybe try your local MP

But why isnt your daughter giving them a statement? I appreciate she’s scared but does she understand how it’s limiting what the police can do? Otherwise all they have is cctv of masked kids?

there are things you can get that like burst open and spray paint so you know who it is. I'm not sure for like things like this but could you chuck paint over them? I know it sounds bazzare and especially if you are scared but then you know for a fact who it is coz it will be obvious with the steins. If it were me, I'd do this... I am a bit of a weird thinker though

This is awful. Try & get Paladin (stalking charity) involved because they'll make the police take action. We all know that when this behaviour is rooted in male rejection, it's extremely dangerous.

Re the police. We had prowling gang in the area attempting to steal motorbikes. I was told by police to drag them into the house & teach them a lesson. Apparently you won't be prosecuted if you do this, but you will be prosecuted if your cricket bat finds them outdoors. No way would I risk this because the little shits are almost always carrying machetes, plus I don't trust the police as far as I could throw them & would likely finish up dead (Henry Nowak, bless his heart) or locked up on an overinflated sentence.

Good luck, stay safe, don't trust the police.

They have been awful we can’t go back to our home children’s services have said she should stay with her dad she’s in bits as she needs me more than ever she has adhd ocd and can’t even be left to go to the toilet alone she needs me in bed with her at the moment as she is terrified and I’m sure has ptsd yet they won’t even fit a fire box until late August no update from police refused to help me get a protective order. I don’t qualify for help with housing we don’t know what’s happening one day to the next are just wants to face a home, I’m done in I have sent an email to mp last night but I don’t know which way to turn

Police say I don’t have evidence of this as they have balaclavas but I KNOW it’s them - am I in my remit to message her and tell her to ensure he’s not near us or do I just leave to police I do t want to make it eitse gif my daughter snd I may be wrong but there’s no one else who is angry with her

Message who? Sorry it’s not clear what you mean. The thing is although these thugs may well be put up to it by this lad, the police actually dont know who they are if they are wearing balaclavas. The issue here is lack of evidence even though Im sure you are right. Can you or your daughter identify the lads in balaclavas ?