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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU wearing pants in summer

16 replies

Necoblast · 19/07/2026 20:49

I'm 18 and live with my father. Anyways, I want to dress modestly because of personal beliefs but my dad thinks that I should wear shorts in the hot weather. I told him that my pants are made of a non-hot material and they don't get hot. They also keep away the mosquitos and the UV rays, and they stop my legs from getting scratched from spiky plants that exist outside. I don't think that my dad believes me and he seems concerned about the heat as well as the possibility that my modesty is not mentally healthy. He says that we live in a free country and we don't have to dress that way here.
He says that my unwillingness to wear shorts in hot weather could be anxiety and I have to challenge the belief that I have to cover skin. He also seems to believe that my pants are hot because they “look hot”.
I'm 18, so I know that my brain is not fully developed and I don't fully know what is logical. I made a guess that most people on this website are probably over 18, so they probably could give a second opinion.
Should I make a compromise and maybe buy pants that “look not hot”? Although I would have to wait until he has the time to drive me to the store. Maybe he is right and maybe I don't know what is hot and what is not. I am not “sympathy farming” and I don't seek attention. I will delete this tomorrow. I just want advice and that's it.

OP posts:
Funchythesnowwoman · 19/07/2026 20:52

Wear what you want.

PinkyFlamingo · 19/07/2026 20:53

When you say pants do you mean underwear because it's confusing because you then talk about shorts?
And what has it got to do with your Dad what you wear?

EmpressaurusKitty · 19/07/2026 20:54

Assuming you’re talking about trousers not knickers, cotton or linen ones should be comfortable in the heat.

You can’t delete the thread by the way, you’d need to report it to MNHQ & ask them to do it.

AMurderofMurderingCrows · 19/07/2026 20:54

PinkyFlamingo · 19/07/2026 20:53

When you say pants do you mean underwear because it's confusing because you then talk about shorts?
And what has it got to do with your Dad what you wear?

No I think it's trousers OP means.

EnjoyingTheSilence · 19/07/2026 20:54

If this is real, your dad is weird and controllling. Can you live with any other family member?

AnonymityAnonymity · 19/07/2026 20:55

Wear what you want to wear OP.
You shouldn't wear shorts to please your Dad if you don't want to wear them.
You are 18. You are an adult. It's entirely up to you what you wear.

LittleOrangeEgg · 19/07/2026 20:55

Wear what you want, your dad doesn’t get a say

Overtheatlantic · 19/07/2026 20:55

Are you an American living in the desert?

bridgetreilly · 19/07/2026 21:14

Cool maxi dresses are the best.

nomas · 19/07/2026 21:16

Bare skin is not always helpful for heat. I can't even sleep in shorts. I need to wear very light cotton pyjama bottoms and a camisole.

Your dad seems to want you to dress to conform rather than for your comfort.

Please tell him that you know your body best.

Necoblast · 23/07/2026 00:50

I do not live in a desert and I do not live in America. The summer is abnormally hot this year and last year and the year before that and…
Also my dad is not controlling he just does not seem to know how fabric works

OP posts:
olivepicanto · 23/07/2026 00:55

Wear whatever you want but pants are a must.

PoppieCock · 23/07/2026 00:59

So strange

EBearhug · 23/07/2026 01:00

I think pants here are trousers, not knickers.

It's your choice. If you prefer trousers, wear trousers. When I was 18, I wore shorts right through winter.

Something that covers you all over is meant to be best in hot weather, so loose long clothing, be it a dress or trousers in cotton or linen or the like is a good choice.

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/07/2026 01:04

Where what you like. However, if the modest dress thing is some weird trad wife bullshit, also don’t let the internet tell you what to wear.

MeanwhileinGilead · 23/07/2026 01:07

Tell him you're happy with the clothes you have, you're freely chosen what to wear and are comfortable with what you're wearing, and there's no benefit to his repeatedly bringing it up.

Or start nagging HIM to wear a skirt - that could be cooler and more comfortable than shorts.

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