AIBU to ask how to help my teen with nightmares?

[WillTheRealDeanGaffneyPleaseStandUp]

My 15 year old is having lots of nightmares. Her dad is unwell which has caused a lot of disruption so I think that's the cause but she won't talk about it. She's been offered counselling but has refused. She's very private and dismissive when I try to talk with her.

She says the nightmares are more feelings than actual images iyswim.

She has good sleep hygiene and has no issues falling asleep but wakes up a lot. She squeezes her hands and her (short) nails dig into her so she has taken to wearing gloves to bed.

This has been going on for weeks. She had a bad night last night and is like a zombie this morning.

Can anyone suggest anything so stop/reduce the nightmares?

Eta - she has never really had nightmares before and not to this degree.

I had awful nightmares as a teenager and they've returned now I'm menopausal and having hot flushes. So in my case I suspect it's spells of overheating due to fluctuating hormones - could it be this in your DDs case? Maybe lightweight, sleeveless, pure cotton nighties and a lightweight duvet would help.

Put a coloured light bulb or accessible visual image or object, this maybe also tactile - when she wakes she can focus on this to ‘ground’ herself in the safety of her bedroom in that moment which is distinctly different to her nightmare

There are other grounding techniques you can use if she googles she can pick on she likes, they take practice to become embedded as a response to over ride whatever else’s is occurring

Breathing techniques also help to regulate

As the person is asleep when this happens you can use the above to manage the response so it’s less distressing and subsides

She really does need to talk about her fears about what is happening to help process things so things are not stuck and manifesting as nightmares

Sorry to hear that @3beesinmybonnet . I really hope they settle soon for you.

I dont think it's temperature but I'll suggest it to her.

@Projectprincesschaos I know she needs to talk to someone. She gets mad if she thinks I'm trying to get her to talk. School were aware and checking in with her but she wouldn't talk to them. She wouldn't engage with Camhs (she was vaguely open to the idea but she'd shut down again by the time they contacted her), we have looked at paying for something of her choice but she just wouldn't entertain it.

Hiwever, I like the idea of a physical object. She likes messing about with things so it might appeal to her. I'll have a chat with her. Thanks.