AIBU to deeply value children's thank-you letters

[MaddestGranny]

As a child, I was taught to write thank-you letters for presents received on birthdays and at Christmas. It felt a bit like torture, because my mum gave me no help whatsoever and I had no idea what, or how much, to say.

When I had my DD, I'd make a list of 'the-giver-and-the-gift' at birthdays & Christmas as an aide memoire, so that, afterwards, I could help DD write a (minimalistic) thank-you letter (when she was v little, a little drawing with "thank you, love from, XXX"). We'd then make an expedition to the post-box to post them.

Now, DD supports DGS to write his thank-you letters. I've just received one. It's a home-made card with a little drawing and "thank-you for my presents, Granny. I loved all of them". I find it a joy to receive them. One of the earliest - a v early nursery age drawing - I have in a frame together with the envelope it came in.
I notice, and my DD notices, that we seem to be unusual in our adherence to this tradition.
Am I , are we, being old-fashioned, quaint and BU?

It’s nice and all, but all I associate them with is children being forced to write them.

Me too! Sad as that is. I always send thank you texts now.

I'm the same. I had to write thank you letters as a child and then taught my children to write them. My mum always loved receiving them and I found she had saved all the letters when we were clearing out her house when she died.

I think it’s a lovely thing for a child to do…

a little picture or just their name when learning to write and eventually the whole sentence ‘thank you for the book’

I think we live in a very self centred world and kids learning to write a little thank you to express a little gratitude is a good thing.

Still do it now as an adult (though words now not a little drawing!) as I live to let the sender know how thankful I am to be thought of.

I think it is such a lovely thing to give to the sender of a gift to show thanks and gratitude .

it’s not forced it our house - but modelled as kind and loving behaviour.

I forced our children to write than you cards.

I’m pretty sure they have virtually died out now and a text will suffice. Like Christmas cards, they’re quite meaningless and unvalued.

Me too. I always say to my sil that they don't need to do them.

Having said that I got some thank you letters in the post that were beautifully drawn and lovely writing today and it really lifted my spirits. I don't think they were forced either.

While I would be grateful for the gesture if I received a thank you drawing or letter from a young child I don’t think I would value it, or keep it unless it was literally my own child or grandchild.

Yeah YANBU to like it but YABU to think it’s commonplace, it’s definitely on the way out (thank God). I also associate it with being forced to do it usually for some distant relatives I never met who sent gifts I didn’t want, need, ask for or like.

I think if someone has spent time, money and effort to give a present, they should be thanked. I’m happy with a text these days, but I’m disappointed if there’s no acknowledgement.

It’s nice that you value them but when they are a miserable chore for a child, I don’t really understand why you’d want that. I agree that teaching children to say thank you is important but nowadays a quick video or voice message works just as well.

I think if someone has spent time, money and effort to give a present, they should be thanked. I’m happy with a text these days, but I’m disappointed if there’s no acknowledgement.
My DD would get her letters written in advance of receiving the gift, just leaving a gap to insert "the money", "the book" etc!
A thank you is very important to me. I have one nephew who has never acknowledged gifts (his sister does) as my SIL says "boys don't bother with thank you's", well my DSon does!
Obviously I stopped sending him gifts as he isn't interested. Apparently he was pretty miffed when I managed two Glastonbury tickets for his sister in '24, but...you reap what you sow.