Last night, my boyfriend and I were in the living room, I was watching TV and he was on his laptop at the table. He got up and said “I’m going for a lie down, I don’t feel great again” and I said okay no problem. He does have anxiety so when he says he isn’t feeling great I know he will be feeling dizzy as he gets vertigo with it and needs to go and lie down in a dark room. About 45 minutes or so later, he came downstairs clearly in a mood. I had to repeatedly ask what was wrong with him before he told me that he was upset that I didn’t come upstairs to comfort him or make sure he was okay. I just left him to go to bed knowing he didn’t feel great. I told him that I thought that’s what he would want, to go and have a lie down by himself and wait for the dizziness to pass. I didn’t do it out of not caring, I just thought that me going with him wouldn’t be helpful. This isn’t the first time he’s dealt with this, if it was the first time then I’d be more concerned and have gone up to check on him and ask what he needs. But we know that it’s anxiety, it’s happened many times before. So I thought he was just going upstairs to sleep it off or wait for it to pass. He is calling me cold and saying i don’t care, but I didn’t know that that’s what he wanted from me. If he was unwell or had a virus or something, I would have been more attentive, but I used to have anxiety in the past and know that in that situation I would’ve wanted to be left alone. How was I supposed to know that he wanted me to go with him?
I am now feeling guilty and questioning myself. Am I in the wrong? Whenever he has anxiety, I always do my best and try to get him to calm him down or get him anything he needs like water etc. but he chose to take himself away so I assumed he wanted to be alone!