AIBU to be annoyed my daughter’s party package changed last minute?

[cakeandparty]

I booked my DDs party over six months ago, paying a deposit. It’s quite pricey but included all the catering and balloons, party bags and cake so I thought all I had to do was show up.

I’ve called them a few times to settle the balance but the manager has never been in. I finally got through to her today and she casually said that they no longer include cake or party bags. I asked when this changed and the reply was march.

The party is on Saturday. I have two days now to sort a cake and party bags. When I pointed this out she said that she could sort the party bags but unfortunately not the cake.

It isn’t that I can’t get one; I can, although it’s a pain, but I just think I could so easily have turned up on the day and had neither cake nor party bags (as I can pay on the day; it’s just easier to get it all sorted beforehand.)

Feeling a bit stressed at what a near miss it was, to be honest!

I would deduct £50 off the final payment as well. A cake and party bags are pretty essential parts of a party! (Or ask for £50 refund if already paid), especially as you said they’re still advertising these on the website.

The thing is, what MN wants is a big row between me and the role play place and a big drama preferably spreading over more than one thread. Unfortunately, that’s the opposite of what I want; I want to enjoy DDs birthday and if this means shelling out for a cake myself I’m OK with that.

I will be having a conversation with them after the event in which I’m going to point out that the terms did change from when I made the original booking.

However, while I didn’t include this in my OP, they changed the times and offered me £50 off a few months ago but when they sent the final bill over this wasn’t included. So I have questioned this. I don’t want to be demanding £50 for the time change and £50 or whatever for the cake.

It has been a bit of a shambles truth be told!

“I don’t want the day to be tainted”
by any confrontation with them (and they moved your party time too and promised you a part refund and didn’t honour it and still paid!) but you’ll spend the day with the voices of mumsnetters ringing in your ears about what a pussy you are…

I haven’t paid 🤷‍♀️ I’ve emailed back querying the £50 they agreed to take off. I do expect that to be stuck to, but then to then say ‘and I want another £50 off and I want and I want’ is just turning into argumentative territory tbh, and frankly, I can’t be bothered!

What are they providing now? A party is not much without a cake! Have you missed an email, in spam perhaps, that advised you of this earlier?

so why are you here?

It seems like you are arguing against posters who are supporting you to get some discount and who agree YANBU

Well, it’s the exclusive hire of the venue (role play place) food, drinks, party bags which they agreed to include when I challenged them - so for all the ‘you are such a fool’ posts I don’t think I am. I stood my ground with the party bags, and I have argued politely with them re the £50. I just think quite honestly that’s enough arguments about a three year olds birthday! 😂

@HGHGHG I’m not ‘arguing’ with anybody, just explaining that if people are hoping for a huge drama there isn’t going to be one - I don’t have time for that!

I just don’t understand why you posted. Surely you knew every was going to say ‘you can’t pay the price you were quoted when you didn’t receive what you were quoted for’?

Well, I don’t really know why either I am sure. I also texted a couple of friends grumbling about it and I don’t know why I did that either but they didn’t seem to mind; I’m sorry you do.

I don’t know if I’m more outraged by them pulling the cake and party bags or you for not saying anything

Of course I don’t mind.

You’re coming across so pleased with yourself for not feeling the need to kick up a fuss about this. You absolutely don’t need to kick up a fuss but one thing I would do is explain to them they should make it clear re party bags and cake on their package in case some poor kid does end up with no cake one day. That would be a real shame.

Hope your daughter has a lovely party.

It depends what you mean by ‘not saying anything.’

I have said to them that those things (cake and party bags) were included at the time of making the booking. They have agreed to include party bags but cannot include the cake. Given that I have already disputed the cost of the package owing to a change of times I’ve decided to let the cake go and just get a couple of Colins or whatever. I don’t personally feel anyone should be outraged. Besides, one cannot be outraged in front of a Colin.

No, not pleased with myself. Just a bit bewildered at it all.

I mean, to boil it down there are three things they have changed.

1. the price. I have disputed this.
2. the party bags. I disputed this and they agreed to include them.
3. the cake. I did point out that this was included in the original booking and got a ‘yeah sorry can’t do anything about it:’ I agree they should have knocked some money off but given I’ve ‘won’ with the first two I guess I just don’t see it as critically important that I get £30 more off or whatever.

I wouldn't cause a scene either, but I actually think you'd be doing the business a favour if you complain, fully, after the party. They

• unilaterally changed the time
• forgot to apply their apology discount,
• unilaterally cancelled both the party bags and cake, which are part of your contract with them
• didnt take any steps to communicate the cancellation to you proactively (meaning you could have found out on the day)
• only reinstated the party bags when you challenged
• are still advertising both the bags and cake on their website, misleading future customers

If this small business doesn't get their act together and start valuing their customers, they'll not last long!!

I’d source the cake and party bags elsewhere and then ‘pay on the day’ the balance minus the cost of the cake and bags. Follow up with a written communication that includes copies of the receipts and making clear in the communication you were only told 2 days before the party so too late to go elsewhere, and that had YOU not contacted THEM you would not have known until the day and your daughter’s party would have been ruined so you took the only action left open to you. Point out too their website still advertises the cakes and bags. Then let them try to take you to court to recover their remaining money if they have the nerve. I wouldn’t fancy their chances. Personally I’d leave a bad review too to warn other parents.

OP why are you being so passive over this. It does not matter that they are a small business or that you feel bad for them or whatever. They promised you X, you paid for the service on the basis of getting X, and now, at very short notice they have changed the goalposts and expect you to suck that up at additional cost? Fuck that.

It's not on. That is not how you do business. It is not being difficult or unreasonable to point out that their shifted goalposts are costing you £50, or £100 or whatever it is, and stating that you expect that to be taken off the bill.

You would be incredibly unreasonable to send a grovelling email after the party, gushing about how amazing it was and then adding a wee bit at the end asking very politely whether they would possibly, maybe, consider a partial refund? Just no. If you must wait until after to raise this then keep it factual and concentrate that you are out of pocket. How nice or otherwise the party was is neither here not there.

I don’t think it’s passive - it’s just more win some lose some. Yes, I expect them to honour the £50 off and I have stood my ground with the party bags just don’t want to keep endlessly arguing over what should be a special day

@CastleCrasher to be fair with the timings they did ask first and that was months ago, so no issue with that - if I got £50 off! Which I don’t see how they couldn’t as it’s in writing.

I don’t want to argue with anyone here. I was a bit taken aback yesterday and cross but I’m fairly sanguine now. I wouldn’t use them again for a party booking as it’s been a bit chaotic but honestly the main thing is DD has a ball and I’m sure she will, even if it’s a Colin!

This, buy the cake then say you would like a free pass to the activity.

You have a contract with them. They broke it.
What an awful experience.

Blimey. Just speak to them and get it sorted. Do it BEFORE the party. You don't even know what they'll offer yet, whether it's a refund or a free party (as you said they'll "probably" offer). No one has said anything about a fight with juicy content that'll last a few threads. People are telling you what to do and why you should confront them politely, and you won't do it. Why ask here for advice then?

It is sorted. Thanks

Happy birthday Miss Cakeandparty.

Why wouldn’t you list all the discounts you want? They listed and are implementing all the changes they want? Don’t be a pushover

So you're saying it's a bit of a shambles and are so done with the fuss. If that's the case why come moaning on MN? What did you expect? If you are billed for a service you don't receive, ie the birthday cake I would be expecting that to be reflected in the price.
Your child is turning 3, as long as they have fun is the main thing.
There is bound to be a point where you could nip out for 10mins or so to discuss things with the manager or can you not be bothered doing that either?

This £50 off is great but it’s absolutely nothing to do with the cake/party bags not being included, if anything, as you rightly say it’s just showing even more that they’re a bit of a shambles overall.