AIBU to think an older spare iPhone is enough for a child?

[FeelingLikeADinosaur]

Name changed for this. For context, I’m not blessed with children of my own. An elderly relative asked me if I had a spare mobile phone as their grandchild (primary school age) has broken theirs in some incident or other. I have an iPhone that I’ve kept aside as a backup and said I could pass that on and my elderly relative sounded grateful. Not long after, my elderly relative calls me all upset because the youngster’s mother really isn’t happy because my spare iPhone isn’t new enough for their child as apparently it won’t support the social media apps they need and they’re now expecting my elderly relative to stump up the cost of providing them with a working mobile. I get that my spare iPhone is an older model than the child’s broken one, but isn’t something better than nothing while their mother saves to buy a replacement and the mother should be managing their child’s expectations with this? Or AIBU and it really is that important for kids to have the latest technology and my elderly relative should step in if they can?

Iphones and ipads are horrible for becoming obsolete very fast and not supporting apps. We have a couple of (otherwise perfectly functional) ipads just useless because most apps won't download.

An older android would probably be fine.

YANBU, but it’s not your kid, your money, or your problem.

It must be very old as even my iPhone 4 from 2011 supported social media apps…

Are you sure it’s not social media apps but the school homework and lunch payment apps?

This situation, or something very similar, was on an entitled CF post. And no one thought it was reasonable for a mum to complain. A lot of children don't have phones, and even some rich Silicon Valley parents make of a point of only allowing dumbphones for their teenagers.

No primary school child needs an iPhone at all let alone with access to social media apps.

Point out to your friend they are in no way responsible for replacing the iPhone.

This is fixed very simply, if the mother actually wants to solve the problem rather than trying to wrangle a new phone out of a kind-hearted relative. Iphones don't "time out" like Android phones used to (no idea if they still do, it's the reason I stopped using them). The mother just needs to update the OS to the latest one. Job done. I'm still using my iPhone 12 and literally every app works perfectly (although its battery life's a bit naff now).

Having said that, I missed that the child was primary age. They shouldn't be allowed on SM anyway, it has age restrictions for a reason. But if they want general apps like games or messaging their parents then they just need to update the operating system.

No child needs social media.

If the phone still functions for calls and texts (extra bonus for maps and internet browser too) then anything other than extreme gratitude for your donation is just brattish. I mean, even if it didn't work at all it would still warrant a 'thanks so much for trying to help us but unfortunately it didn't work'.

The mum's attitude makes me think the child is probably very spoiled and entitled. What a shame for the elderly relative.

Well like previous posters I'm entirely distracted by the fact that a primary school aged child shouldn't have a phone at all, let alone social media FFS. Yanbu

I think they're saying the phone doesn't work with certain apps to manipulate the grandmother to buy a new iPhone.

My DD has an iPhone 11 and it's works fine.

It’s bad enough that a primary child has a smartphone , even worse that they have access to social media. Demanding a new(er) iPhone is just the cherry on a shit cake.
DD just gets my old phone when I renew my contract and she’s a teen and perfectly happy with that.

This is why I switched to android, our very expensive at the time MAC is now just a glorified hard drive as all the photos are on there!

Why is relative expected to stump up the cost for a phone the child broke??

It’s hard to say without knowing…….

1. What model is the phone? Some are obsolete now due to software updates.
2. what did the Mother actually say to your relative? She may have just said oh thank you but the phone doesn’t actually work with current updates and apps, without actually complaining?

But if they’re actually expecting them to shell out cash for a new iPhone, and your relative hasn’t got the wrong end of the stick, then they are DBUR!!!!

This child sounds like a spoiled brat.

The fact that a primary school child has social media says what shit parenting is involved here.

I'd tell this lady to get your old iphone back and not get her any phone at all.

Apple products date horribly and become very slow.

With so much evidence against mobile phones for under 14s then why not suggest a brick phone?

That’s very strange, Mac’s generally outlast PCs IME……… my friend had one that was still going after 17 years!

Its still functional but basic as the IOS hasn't updated in about 5yrs. They are typically obsolete are 8 years, which given how expensive they are, I think is shocking.

https://www.macworld.com/article/673939/this-is-how-long-macs-and-macbooks-last.html

Thanks, some good points here. Very true, sadly, about how fast some devices go obsolete. My spare is an iPhone 5 so probably only good for calls and messaging. The mother is expecting my elderly relative to pay to fix or replace the child’s broken one but I’m not sure why!

Was the relative involved in any way in the incident when the phone was broken?

No, nothing to do with them!

Tell the elderly relative not to pay. Tell the mother to stop taking advantage of the elderly relative and to take a look at schools mobile phone policies, many of which are going down the route of no smart phones in school even for travle to and from and giving a list of brick phones which will be acceptable.

Agree. I only got my DC a phone in year 6 because they started walking home from school and it was indeed the spare iPhone which passed to all 3 of them at that age so by the time it reached the youngest it was very old. I upgraded for them all by year 8 but at a young age they just need to be able to call and text. They can have an iPad for games at home.

Sounds like their parenting is different to mine! Mine did get out old iPhones for many years until their teens when their phone became so important and then we started inheriting their old phones. Currently using perfectly functional 12 that one of them upgraded ages ago.
But it’s not about the phone. It’s about why your relative is getting pressure about something that not their problem.