To be so upset by what my aunt said and did when I went to visit

[Droopydroopingdropped]

Hello
I know I am probably being unreasonable and my aunt had every right to say what she said but I feel horrible and just want to get things off my chest
I can't talk about this to anyone in real life as they will think me too shallow
Anyway I visited family abroad after 6 years and the first thing my aunt said when I arrived at her house was "You look so different, oh you've changed so much."
When I visited last I was 50, still having periods and also had met the man I am now married too so I was all giddy and glowy. Six years on and, although still in love, life throws a lot of stress at you etc plus I am post menopausal.
I thought I looked okay but she kept mentioning it, saying oh my hair was so thick before now its thin, I look drawn, I dont look like before.
Just basically making me feel like shit.
She wouldn't cook either so would just eat snacks for herself and then fry me a load of chips
After a few days of this my skin came out in horrible boils
I endured 3 weeks but luckily there were some other relatives who took me out for meals and tried to send food for me because they all know what this aunt is like.
She would ask what I would like to eat but then just make chips
When I came back to the UK I got diagnosed with fatty liver!
I feel traumatised by my experience and I don't want anything more to do with this aunt who seems to be angry that I have had the audacity to age.
I did manage to stay with a cousin for a couple of nights but her husband didnt really like me being there.
I spent so much money for the flights and buying gifts for everyone and bar a few of them they just made me feel awful especially the aunt!
She is my mum's youngest sister, never been married, she lives with her unmarried brother who also has gone a bit weird.
I am researching fillers and plastic surgery, she has given me a complex.

Tactless and rude, though!

Thinking of my Irish and Italian relatives and Nigerian/Ghanaian friend's, they fit your original description. I'd have to ask if the Aunt was well and show over the top concern, to find out what's going on. Tbh, they'd have to be ill or in financial crisis to not feed you. I'd be discussing this with wider family to find out what went wrong.

She’s already spent enough money. Not her fault the host wasn’t welcoming or thoughtful.

I have been to both India and Pakistan. There are fruit and vegetable stalls/carts all over the place, and street food in most areas too. Even if it is the most remote part of the most remote rural village, there were obviously means to procure food since her aunt had a stocked fridge of chips/potatoes! In three weeks, you can take a bus/bike to the nearest store and stock up on things you like to eat or move out to a place you are able to cook for yourself. Even on tiny remote islands where there are hardly any provisions, you can always find ways to eat as a tourist so someone who is from the place surely can get produce in to cook a meal!

No it wasn't her fault, and yes she had spent enough money on getting there, but sometimes you just have to cut your losses and make the most of a difficult situation. I love staying with my in laws in East Africa, but I'm confident at saying yes and no, even when they try and force feed me (with the best, kindest of intentions I hasten to add, not like this case).

I've also stayed for months in rural South Africa where there are not really any shops or food deliveries, but you can buy an avocado, eggs and some oranges from local stores or food stalls. It's just not true that for three weeks the only option for meals was chips!

There are loads of places on the planet without delivery services - ludicrous comment.

No but assuming she wasn’t chained up, she didn’t need to stay as long, especially as she was offended enough to consider fillers etc

What’s wrong with some posters here. Appalling results in poll! OP was invited to stay. It was an expensive trip. She was a thoughtful guest and took presents. Her aunt was rude and unwelcoming and a poor host. I’d have been very disappointed too. Guests shouldn’t have to go out looking for food!

Not only does a few weeks of chips not cause fatty liver disease, a few days of chips does not cause boils!

Then you should have left as soon as it all started to go sideways.

Maybe consider doing the Freedom Program. You would be less of a passenger in your own life.

And the fatty liver …. Is she justified to blame the aunt for that?

I travelled extensively, including in some pretty remote areas devoid of tourists and I have never come across a village that wouldn't have a market stall of some description. Fair enough, OP couldn't cook but I refuse to believe that she could not find a fruit stall in the vicinity to supplement her chip diet with something healthy.
Also she says her cousins took her out for a meal which would suggest there were restaurants available.
Nobody is suggesting that her aunt is a picture of hospitality. We just find it genuinely strange that OP couldn't do anything at all to improve her nutrition.

Good grief, ghost the woman, she sounds awful! Sorry you had to put up with this @Droopydroopingdropped I know/have known some women like this, several I am related to, and I have quietly given them a wide berth.

Was being diplomatic

This is very weird…

Not according to google:
While major food delivery apps operate in over 100 countries, comprehensive, modern services are largely absent, limited, or non-existent in areas with limited digital infrastructure, economic isolation, or political conflict
. Countries lacking formal, widespread apps include North Korea, Iran, and several nations experiencing acute humanitarian crises, such as parts of Yemen and Sudan.
Wikipedia +3

• Conflict and Political Constraints: Countries like North Korea, Iran, and sometimes Yemen or Venezuela lack the digital infrastructure or international companies necessary for apps like Uber Eats or Glovo.
• Infrastructure & Economic Limitations: In many developing nations across Africa (outside major hubs like South Africa, Kenya, and Nigeria) and parts of Central Asia, formal courier services are largely replaced by traditional, direct-from-restaurant delivery.

You sound quite petulant

I know. Lots of MNers are having a lovely time having a go at her, as if they can't possibly imagine that different cultures could be different from British ones. Can't think why.

It's interesting you mention UberEats and ready meals as not being available there because it makes me wonder if that's what you rely on at home and neither are healthy choices. Maybe you just mean you couldn't leave your aunt's house to go proper shopping as she would be upset? Was it impossible to be assertive about this? There really are few places in the world without markets, corner shops, street food or something of the sort to create a basic meal.
Obviously, you won't be going back to stay there again but you can improve your health and appearance to boost your self esteem if it bothers you but mainly you need to disregard awful Auntie's comments and move on.

That literally says there aren't delivery services in lots of places on Earth. Try actually reading it.

Or they can imagine and they disapprove, perhaps?

Sure.